An Easter Education

"Is Easter the Easter bunny's birthday?" went the innocent question from my daughter Kris last year. Even as I laughed and pulled her in for a cuddle, I began wondering how I would tackle this. I grew up in a country where Easter was not a national celebration; it was significant only to the Christian community and we all knew that the central figure in the Easter story is Jesus (the bunny was way low-profile back then). Kris is growing up in an environment where all the major Christian festivals may be national holidays, but where Jesus is far removed from the mainstream celebrations and associated imagery. Santa becomes the star at Christmas, and Easter is the bunny's time in the limelight.

So it's quite understandable that Kris thought Easter revolved around the bunny. Of course I wanted to set her straight, but how do you explain death and resurrection to a three-year old and not leave her scared, or scarred? At the time, I simply told her that Easter was about Jesus, who was 'taken away' by the 'bad people', but that He managed to come back and save everybody, and that is why we celebrate Easter.

Kris putting the marzipan crosses on Hot Cross Bun Cookies

Don't get me wrong, I'm not against Santa or the bunny. I think they add a fun element to these celebrations and I happily share Kris's excitement in the Easter egg hunts and hat parades. We enjoy making Easter bonnets and bunny masks and as you can see here, we've been busy baking to share treats with our friends. But at the same time, I feel it's essential to remember what's really at the heart of this celebration, and more importantly, to take the time to help my child understand that too.

Easter sugar cookies. Left: bunny-scape. Top right: Easter egg cookies. Bottom right: Easter gift basket.

Kris is now a year older, and wiser (sort of :D). Because of tv and her peers, she now has words like 'dead' and 'kill' in her vocabulary, which gave me room to be more specific about the Easter story this year. We've been going through her kiddy Bibles, reading the stories from them, and this has led to some memorable conversations. I will always cherish the priceless expressions that race across her face as she tries to absorb it all.

Our talks have also had another unexpected effect: in teaching Kris, I am learning afresh too. In searching for words to explain our faith in its simplest terms, I found myself reconnecting with it more profoundly than I ever have before. And it feels like I'm discovering the beauty of it all over again, which when you think about it, is exactly what this period should achieve.

Easter Sunday then dawned and we had a quiet morning at home. I was feeling rested and renewed. We video-chatted with my family and when my mother asked Kris why we were celebrating, she said it was because Jesus died and came back to save us.  I lit up with her answer .... and then deflated a moment later when she said, "but the bunny is the bigger part about Easter." {sigh}.

It's going to take quite a few Easters before she really gets it. I know it's a slow and lifelong process. Her questions haven't abated in the week since, and I'm encouraged that she wants to keep reading from her Bible, instead of me making her do it. Of all the things we do together, I especially treasure the time we've spent discussing Jesus over the past few weeks. I only hope I'm able to sustain her interest, and help her budding faith flourish. 
 

An incredibly fragile royal icing filigree cross atop a simple vanilla cake with cream cheese frosting & toasted almonds.

Not Just an Economic Crisis

And so again after a visit to Renu's blog, I'm compelled to convert a comment into a post, because one thought led to another which led to a third ..... so on and so forth, till its just too long in the comment form.

Straight off, let me say that I struggled mightily with economics and finance in my formal education and still do not fully understand the intricacies of both. But what I do understand very clearly is this: you violate His laws, you will pay a price someday. As you sow, so shall you reap, or to borrow my sister's favourite acronym, JKVB - Jaisi Karni Vaise Bharni (and now look at the amazing coincidence that as I was going through some of my regular blogs, I came across Goofy Mumma's latest!)

In many places, I recall the current economic crisis being described as the failure of the capitalist philosophy. I disagree.

I see this crisis as the failure of regulatory authorities who should've ensured organizations didn't overstretch their limits. I see this crisis as a failure of organizations themselves in that they were over-ambitious. Most importantly, I see this economic crisis as an after-effect, the result of a much more deeper cause: a moral, ethical & spiritual failure.

Very simply, people got greedy.

Right from childhood, we're taught that greed is bad. In fact, Christianity considers it as one of seven deadly sins. Deadly sin. I find it really amazing that people get so immersed in their careers and money-making that they forget these basic truths along the way. Many will scoff at anything to do with religion & spirituality; they outright dismiss simple values as 'touchy-feely crap' and see them as having no connection to the "business world".

And yet, when this crisis first erupted, and companies - supposedly well-established industry giants - started collapsing one after the other, the first thing people ran towards was God. Churches, in New York City especially, reported record attendance as desperate souls from the corporate world turned to Him for some way out of the mess they'd gotten themselves into.

I repeat: you violate His laws, you will pay a price someday. You can't ..... restrict God to a slot in your life. You can't say, ok God, I'll come see you in so&so place of worship, I'll give some money to xyz charity and that's it, be happy with that, what I do in my job is my business, not Yours.

Many people (including some members of my own family), believe that their "security" and their "status" lies in the size of their bank balance. Everything else comes in second to the all-important goal of money. Instead of work being a part of life, it becomes their whole life, to the exclusion of God, their own health and personal relationships. So when you make that sort of uncontrolled greed your way of life ....... how do you expect to walk away unscathed? And for a crisis of this magnitude to have occurred, its not just a few people here and there who went astray, but entire generations, entire societies that are to blame.

Anything taken to an extreme is bad; so the fault does not lie in capitalism per se, but in the unchecked, unbridled capitalism and materialism. I still believe in the capitalist philosophy, so long as we operate within a moral and ethical framework at the individual and the larger organizational and societal levels.

The values of hard work, honesty, saving and spending within your means are extolled by most faiths, and they are meant to guide us in all aspects of life. They are NOT irrelevant or outdated in present times however "modern" we consider ourselves, and whatever our accomplishments, none of us is above them. Provided we adhere to these guidelines, we have every right to enjoy the fruits of our efforts.

More Money, More Faith?

I got started on this post quite a few days ago when I read this terrific piece by Amrita, but with one thing and another, blogging took a backseat and I couldn't complete it with the same steam that I had begun. I also needed time to think, to do a little introspection and get my thoughts in order. I feel very passionately on these subjects and can be very vocal on them, so some distance was needed if I wanted to produce a coherent post. Hopefully, I've succeeded.

My first instinct right after reading Amrita's post was to rant about how people needlessly fritter small fortunes away on flowers, garlands, fireworks and other frivolities.

Does He really need them? In the grand scheme of things, what are a few flowers offered at any one place of worship when you compare it to the vast variety He Himself has created? And fireworks ..... the lakhs and lakhs spent on them! One explosion of sound, a few seconds worth of flash and glitter and poof! Its over. How does that match up to the unimaginable wonders that exist in His universe - the stars, the shooting stars, planets, comets, galaxies that have endured since beyond our comprehension?

But then a small voice in my head said: Don't I like attending mass in a clean church with fresh flowers and candles at the altar? Don't I appreciate the paintings, sculptures and other ornaments that adorn the interiors? Don't I get excited to see the extra lights and decorations at festivals? Don't I watch fireworks displays as enthralled as any child?

What about in my home itself? Don't I like to have a well-decorated altar? Don't I light candles and place flowers there? Don't I like to jazz up my home during festivals? Christ was born in a shabby little manger and there were definitely no sparkling lights, no shiny decorations around at that time ..... so why do I bother with them at Christmas?

Now let's move outside to the buildings themselves. Don't I pause to ooh and aah over a beautifully built church / temple / mosque or any other place of worship? The more exquisite the architecture and the embellishments, the more money involved in its construction. But as I gaze at them in awestruck wonder, do I care about how much it would have cost? Even if my thoughts turn to money, do I begrudge it, do I think it a waste? No ....... its for God, I'd say.

But can any human creation possibly compare to His creation???

So then why do we do it?

These things are a token of our faith, our humble efforts to honour God. I emphasize 'humble' because again, in comparison with His works, anything we do is just that - humble. And more importantly, these are mere tokens; they cannot be the sum & substance of our faith.

Many priests whose sermons I've had the privilege of hearing, constantly stressed the need to go beyond mere ritualism and tokenism and actually live our faith. This simply meant keeping the ideals of love, service and forgiveness paramount in all aspects of life, something I believe all the great religions of this world preach.

But sadly, many people seem to believe that the more money they spend on religious activities, the more God will be pleased with them. Its far, far easier to hand out some notes or write a cheque than it is to practice "love, service and forgiveness" in the daily grind of life. But ultimately, it isn't how much you have, but how you live your life that matters.

Its not that we shouldn't spend money at all on our religious functions; just as long as we remember that whatever we do, we do it to glorify Him, not to glorify ourselves. And as we spend, I think we should also remember that we are duty-bound to help those in need. There has to be a balance between celebrations, donations and trying to live our daily lives by His word for faith and worship to be truly meaningful.

Great Expectations

I began this year, determined to stay optimistic and positive. But have you ever noticed, that the moment you take some important decision is exactly when life / fate / God puts you to the test? Its like He thinks, hmmm, so Shalom has decided to do so & so; well, lets see how she handles this. And BAM!!! Something happens that tests that decision's strength to its limits and my optimism flies out the window.

I am not naturally optimistic. In fact, I am the exact opposite, a total pessimist. I came to this self-realisation in college, and was quite disappointed because I'd always believed myself to be the "glass is half full" type of person. Its easy to be so when things are going great, but when problems hit, or any challenge comes my way, I realised that my instinctive reaction is full-on panic. I immediately think of everything that could possibly go wrong, and how completely unprepared and unable I am to deal with the situation.

But then I also realised something else: after the force of that initial panic ebbs a bit, I pray, and prayer and effort get me through the challenge quite well. So that's my modus operandi, that's how I function. I don't deny the panic, but I don't let it stay too long either (and here, fans of Lost might recall the pilot episode where Jack describes something similar, but I'm digressing, so back to the topic). I have to fight off the panic, I have to consciously choose to be optimistic and say, yes, I can do this, and I can do it well.

So now back to the start of 2009, where I was revelling in my optimism and the strength of my faith. Just a day later, and something happened, or rather didn't happen, that put a dent in my optimistic armour. Over the next few days, that dent became a mighty gash, and I panicked like I've never panicked before, all thoughts of optimism forgotten. I actually questioned God, why are you doing this to me NOW? We had had other plans in place, big plans, so how were we going to manage this ..... situation, along with all that???

I broke down in front of hubby, who bravely comforted me, suppressing his own worries in the face of my obvious distress. His one solution for me if I'm in doubt, is to talk to my mother who'll put us in a right perspective. And as always, talking to her helped control that panic, and then hubby & me both felt comforted. Practical as ever, she said we didn't know anything for sure as yet, and even if what we suspected turned out to be true, we could indeed manage it quite well.

Thus bolstered, I went ahead with my trip to Bombay, eager to see my mom, dad and sister. A couple of days later, something happened in the morning that completely clarified the situation - I threw up. Very resignedly, I then accepted it: I was pregnant.

After that, the changes hit almost instantly. Barely three hours into a shopping trip, I, who could happily spend a whole day shopping, suddenly turned to lead, plopping down in the nearest chair. I, who have always been a foodie, couldn't bear the sights or smells of most foods. I would bolt from the room if mom started cooking. I could keep down merely a fraction of my usual quantity of food. And though the number of times I actually threw up were very less, I spent hours feeling miserably nauseous.

When we returned to Bangalore, I went to see a gynec. At my first ultrasound scan, I lay down, and was craning my head to see the screen, not that there was anything much to be seen. I thought I could distinguish this line, so I asked the doc whether that was it. She said yes, that's your baby, and its about a centimeter big right now.

Oh, I thought, okay. She rolled the sensor thingy some more over my tummy, pressed a few keys on her keyboard, and then all of a sudden, this steady thump, thump, thump filled the room ...... and my mind went blank. I knew what I was hearing ........ but I had never imagined, never thought that there would be a heartbeat this early. Barely a centimeter big, but with a heart that thumped away strong and sure at 123 beats per minute!

Till that point, I think I'd been completely overwhelmed by the sheer responsibility we faced and how we would go about managing it; I was grappling with the nausea and crying jags so much so that I hadn't really thought about the baby itself.

Only after hearing that heartbeat, did it strike me that this is not a thing or a situation, its a new life, a new person. Hubby's best friend had a baby some months ago, and we just dote on that kid. I used to look at the new parents, and the pure love on their faces as they held their son or played with him, or just looked at him, moved me very deeply. I thought of all my blog friends here who are mothers, and the way you write about your children regardless of their ages, with so much love and joy ......

..... and it started dawning on me that we had been blessed!!!

The panic and the worry subsided then, for both hubby & me, and we started getting excited about our child. I won't say that its been all hunky-dory since then, because I went through the most intensely awful nausea, and its only in the past couple of weeks that its started to phase off. That affected my mood at times too, and it was again a struggle to not sink into a pessimistic slump.

But then, my family used to pep me up, and I would try to focus on my blessings to fight off the gloom: that we could conceive so easily when there are couples we know who have struggled to; that my parents happened to be here when we first found out and they eased hubby & me into this stage; that my mom-in-law then stayed with us a month taking care of us; that other than the nausea, I have had no serious problems ....... and so, managed to hold on to that optimism.

Last week, I completed my first trimester. This time, at the ultrasound, there was no need to strain to see anything as the image on screen was quite clear - head, body and limbs ...... our child, fully formed!!! And to our surprise, very active too, though I can't feel it yet since its only about 3 inches big! By God's grace, baby & I are both healthy so far, and I pray, and request your prayers too that we remain so.

Phew!!! Sometimes I still can't believe it ...... I'm going to be a mother!!!!!

New Year, New Attitude

At the Christmas Mass I attended this year, or rather, last year, the sermon was delivered by a visiting priest from Indonesia. He introduced himself, very humbly, as a "baby priest" and wanted to give a sermon that was "short, but meaningful".

He began with a story from his village back home, where many people raised cows for a living. During summers, the grazing grass would turn unappetizingly dry and seeing this, the cows wouldn't feed. The people therefore developed an amusingly ingenious solution: they made green spectacles and placed them over the cows' eyes! The cows' world, especially the grass, then seemed invitingly green and fresh, and they would continue to feed as usual. The reality, the priest said, was dry grass, but with the green spectacles, the people (and the cows!) found a way to deal with it.

The priest then said that compared to his past visits to India, he'd observed something different this time: that the people seemed to be less enthusiastic about Christmas, that the spirit of the festival was somewhat subdued here. He agreed that it was only natural, given the attacks against Christians in many parts of the country, and the terrorist strike in Bombay. But Christmas, he said, is at its heart, a festival of hope and joy, that God loved the world so much that He sent His Son to live as a human.

The priest concluded by saying that we should not get so overwhelmed by the negativity in our world that we completely forget the positives; the reality of our world undeniably has a lot that's wrong, but by putting on 'spectacles' of optimism and hope, we can find a way to deal with the problems our societies face.

For me, this was a very fitting and much-needed Christmas message, something that I want to take along into the new year too. With all that goes on around us, I think its easy to become depressed and/or cynical ...... but that's NOT how I want to live. I want to be optimistic, I want to feel hopeful and joyful.

I don't mean that I'll be skipping along merrily, believing problems will just disappear on their own, but in the sense that I won't let those problems keep me down and keep me from doing my duty. I won't forget that though there is a lot that's regrettable in our world, there is a lot to be thankful for as well .......

...... (and now, very strangely, the songs running through my head are a mix of Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive and Chumbawamba's Tubthumping!!!) Must be the lack of sleep ...... we brought in the new year the way I like it best - attended Mass and then had a not-so-quiet dinner with family.

Here's wishing you all a TERRIFIC NEW YEAR - Keep the optimism, keep the faith!