Thursday, November 23, 2006

Great Greats

On a lark, Dad googled our "family name" today....and it turned up one very surprising result - a genealogy of my family dating back to the 18th century, made by some distant, distant, relative I've never even heard of. It also contains references to my great-great grandfather and my great-grandfather. Apparently, my great-great grandfather was a philanthropist....he set up a school for children from all walks of life to study in. A school that was later managed by my great-grandfather.

I had never before paid any thought to my ancestors....they were after all, dead and gone a very long time, and I'm a child of this "here and now" generation. But as I read about their incredible achievements, I was struck by a profound sense of awe and....words can't describe the emotion that welled up. These men stood for equality at a time when it was unheard of....championing the cause in their little corner of the world. I won't say anything more, I'm still too overwhelmed. Just wanted to record this.

Sunday, November 19, 2006


As brand "me" enters the online matrimony market, my darling sis has given me a label - LSD - short for 'light social drinker'. One of the matrimony sites inquires about drinking preferences, so the folks and I checked the LSD option without giving it much thought, although mum had a feeling eyebrows would be raised among the extended family.

Raised eyebrows were the least of it. There were looonng debates across the continents. Tears were shed too. "Why should you mention such a thing when you're looking to get married???" Why not, we countered. I'm no party animal or a binge drinker, I said.....I indulge in one drink on a handful of occasions and I like trying out new cocktails. I appreciate a well-crafted drink and always stay within my limits. I see no shame in it whatsoever, and definitely, not something to hide from a prospective mate.

All our arguments don't seem to have achieved anything - they still believe that "such things" are unmentionable topics, especially for a girl. But the inbox flooded with mails expressing interest in me suggest otherwise. It's really mum who handles this, but I'd seen a few 'profiles'.....and then I started noticing something, which made me go through all the profiles. Only a handful had ticked the LSD option; all the 30-40 others were apparently 'non-drinkers'.

This shocked the hell out of me. One or two men may be teetotalers, but for so many to state that they don't drink just reeks of bullshit. And if they're all such puritans, why would they then contact a girl who 'drinks'? The hypocrisy in this just leaves me shaking my head. Why, in this day and age, is it so shameful to state that you drink? I'm not talking about bingeing or anything like that, but an occasional drink in the company of friends & family. If you behave responsibly, why can't you frankly acknowledge it? Do you think that saying you don't drink puts you on a higher moral plane? Why the pretense, especially on a forum where you're looking for a life partner? Isn't honesty in a relationship more important than keeping up so-called appearances?

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Responsible Decisions

This is something I'll try and do regularly: post a brief about spectacular sermons. This evening the priest spoke about the decision to love and follow God. He said that many people follow God based on "feelings" - they're powerfully moved by something or the other and "feel" very strongly for God and so, they decide to follow Him. But what of tomorrow, or the next day, when that "feeling" may not be as strong? Therefore, the decision to follow God must be based in our very beliefs and convictions, and not in something as transient as a feeling. The decision to follow God calls for responsibility, which doesn't change according to our feelings.

He drew a wonderful, and apt, comparison with a parent or a spouse: you may feel great love towards your children or your partner today....but in the course of life, there are times when we get angry with the ones we love; our feelings are not necessarily affectionate all the time. Does that mean we leave them, or stop caring? No. We maintain these relationships, because at the heart of it, there's a conviction that this person belongs to us and that we're responsible for them all the time regardless of how we feel.