Red Moonrise

Older & Grateful

2010-02-28T17:35:00.002+05:30

A lot of people crib about getting older. Many women especially, are very touchy on the subject and will either give you the "its rude to ask a woman her age" line, or else, outright lie about how old they are.

I don't understand why.

Too many people are snatched way before their time. Too many don't make it into their 50s, 40s or even lesser. Too many don't even make it past childhood.

Thinking of all those millions of unknowns who die young, I promised myself some years ago, that I'd never, ever lie about my age, never moan about getting older; instead each birthday, I would just truly thank the Lord that I had made it through one more year.

The thought for this post came to me yesterday, on the eve of my birthday, and I felt that I must take the time to put this up, despite the numerous distractions that have kept me from this blog for so long.

I woke this morning, not with the euphoric thrill of childhood birthdays, but with a more mellowed contentment that I had arrived at another birthday with so much to be thankful for. I began my daily routine, interspersed with calls from family members, wishes also pouring in online, and that sense of contentment grew.

Then we got the news that a neighbour at home in Bombay, my sister's best friend's brother, had died in an accident yesterday. A young man, barely in his 30s. Completely unexpected, and even more tragic because that family lost their mother just last month. That dear lady's death too was just as out-of-the-blue, a sudden heart attack.

I actually staggered when my mother informed me. I can't begin to imagine what that family must be going through: two deaths in two months, both before their time. And I came back to the thought that propelled this post: why many people hate the fact that they are ageing.

Growing old is such a blessing! Its nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to hide and you realise that all the more in the wake of tragedy. Each day, each year you live is a privilege, a miracle, that so many, too many, don't get.

I don't know who said this originally: "I'm not getting older, I'm getting better!"

"Better" or not is debatable; "older" is indisputable. Why even bother denying that???

Today, I turn 26. Some might scoff that its easy to be frank when the number's small, but no matter how high that rises - 36, 56 or Inshallah 96 - I will always gladly & gratefully celebrate growing old :)

Looking Back at 2009

2010-01-16T00:50:00.001+05:30

I'd wanted this to be my last post of 2009, but with one thing and another, couldn't get to it. Though its not as timely as I'd intended, I still must go ahead with it to keep a record of one of the most defining years of my life.

I have always been a creature of stability, but stability was the one thing that was a stranger last year. Barely had 2009 begun, than I was knocked off my feet with the realisation that I was pregnant. Before I could fully come to terms with it and its life-altering consequences, the physical changes hit full force, and I spent the first two months of the year in a nauseous daze. This period was a total emotional roller-coaster: wonder, resentment, guilt, excitement, depression ...... I swung between them all and more.

All thanks to God, that terrible energy-sapping nausea passed off over the next couple of months, and slowly, from the lowest point of my life, I blossomed into the best I've ever felt ...... refreshed, rejuvenated & revitalised!!!

As those first flutters of movement started within me, I began truly bonding with my baby. The nesting instinct kicked in, and I realised that while our then flat had been adequate for hubby & me, there wasn't much room to accomodate a baby and the 101 things needed to comfortably raise it. So thus began our house-hunt.

Most of our family & friends couldn't understand why we wanted to shift when I'd entered my last trimester, and I don't blame them because I too previously used to perceive pregnant women as incredibly delicate. But my actual experience was the exact opposite: I felt immensely strong!!! Firmly believing in 'God only helps those who help themselves', I put my good health to good use by actively looking for a more spacious flat.

It wasn't easy. It took much longer than I'd thought with many false hopes along the way. But right when I'd slump to thinking that maybe this wasn't possible, I'd hear some messages, either in church or on Joyce Meyer's show, encouraging me on. The message with the greatest impact came on Joyce's show. It was:

If you want to walk on water, you have to get out of your boat.

This awesome sentence not only motivated me towards getting the new flat, it has transformed my attitude towards life in general. I have always clung to stability, facing change only with great reluctance. But this one simple statement gave me the strength to be more accepting of changes, to deal with uncertainty without being afraid and renewed my faith in God and His guiding power.

That power led us to our new flat, at the beginning of the ninth month. With the support of family, the shifting and transition took place smoothly. Three short weeks before my due date, we moved in. Ten days later, my baby moved out :)

Life since then was a total whirlwind! Right after coming home, we were absorbed in planning my daughter's baptism, to be held just three weeks away due to the work schedules of my dad & sister. The occasion was a success; most of our family could make it & it was lovely to have our home bustle with so many relatives.

After this, the first major event of Kris's life, things settled into a routine.... for a bit! Both my mom & MIL had come to stay with us. Under their care & support, I recuperated and hubby & I both received a proper initiation into parenting. There were so many things that seemed so frighteningly huge at first: feeding, diaper-changing, massaging, bathing the baby ..... even just learning how to carry her properly, soothe away her tears. But with the guidance of our mothers, we learned.

Around this time, I heard another message on Joyce's show:

God is a God of excellence; if you want to be a real worshipper, you must be excellent too, especially in the mundane, ordinary things of life.

It hit home, and it hit hard. No, its not that overnight I have become this super-excellent person (just look at this blog post, for example ...... its been languishing half-done in my drafts folder since last month!) But that awareness that I can improve - that I'm expected to improve - has set in, and now, in every big or small thing I do (and in many things that I've yet to get around to doing!), there's a voice going "excellence, excellence" in my head. Honestly, I wish I could shut it up sometimes; its bloody difficult pursuing excellence especially when your biggest faults are laziness & procrastination. But I cannot hush it.......

So anyway, that again spurred me on to give my best towards everything. These messages, and the absolute belief that God was watching over us, gave me the strength & courage to accept uncertainty when our new routine was shaken up: first my mom had to leave way earlier than expected, then MIL had to go home for a few days, leaving hubby, me & our baby alone for the very first time.

Well, we were not completely alone; we did have a truly wonderful maidservant who took care of the cleaning. But still, it was my first time running the house, handling the cooking & taking care of the baby by myself (while hubby was at work, at least), ....... and I did it. Hubby & I both did it. We used to function well as husband & wife; now we learnt to function well as papa & mama too :)

The last few weeks of 2009 were again a bustle of activity as we prepared to travel to the UAE, to spend Christmas with my family. Not just hubby & me, everybody was apprehensive about how Kris would handle her first flight. Very fortunately, she remained as cool as ever through the journey (I pray this continues whenever she travels!)

The few days that hubby was here too now just seems a blur, but a wonderful one! Christmas was heart-warmingly crowded, with my uncle & family and some other relatives all gathered at our place. Hubby had to leave a couple of days later, and so he was the only one missing here when 2010 entered.

For me, 2009 zipped by so fast, I still find it unreal sometimes that we're in 2010, more so because 2009 was such a momentous, life-changing year! It was not just becoming a mother, it was also those two messages that make me feel like a different person. Which way this new year will take us, I don't know. The only constant is the infinite grace of God, and in that infinite grace, the support of the wonderful family He has blessed me with. As long as I have these two things, I'll be fine.

So now, finally, I can bid a proper (and a looong overdue!) goodbye & thankyou to 2009, and look forward to the rest of 2010!

A very happy & blessed year ahead to all who read this!!!

A for Avatar!!!!!!!!

2009-12-20T10:29:00.003+05:30

I don't have time for a long post & doubt will get the time for one during Christmas week. But this was just sooooooooooooo amazing, I absolutely HAD TO write something about it.

First, let me scream it out here, coz I can't do this at home:

AVATAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, that's done & I feel loads better :D

I can't believe I was thinking of skipping this film. Only at the insistence of my family did I go to watch it ....... and I am sooooooo glad I did, coz this is undoubtedly THE BEST FILM EVER!!!!!!!!!

I don't have time for a detailed review. Honestly, I don't think I can even frame up coherent sentences about it right now, the mind is still reeling from the after effects of the film. But I had to just say this to anyone who reads this post:

Please do not miss this movie ..... its the ultimate cinematic experience.

For those who may think that it's just some alien sci-fi flick ...... it's not. It has drama, romance, emotion and a very beautiful message at the heart of it. But more than the actual story, it was the story-telling that blew me away.

I'm just over-awed at the depth of human imagination that can convey a message through a story that's set in this incredibly surreal alternate world. The big picture, the little details and everything in between has been so well thought of, its just ......... damn, I don't have the words to do this justice. Its just something that you MUST experience for yourself!!!!!

So once again, PLEASE DO NOT MISS THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!

(Notice how I'm over-emphasizing text throughout this post. I don't usually do that, but I don't know how else to express my immensely enormous enthusiasm over this film. I'm just sorry that this is the largest font size in blogger :D)

Our First Conversation!

2009-12-03T15:00:00.001+05:30

My 3-month old girl: Heh!

Me: Heh!

She: He-eh!!

Me: He-eh!!

She: HE-EH!!!

Me: HE-EH!!!

And so on and so forth for another minute or so, volume getting louder & louder, till:

She: HE-EH-(hic)-EH!!!!!

Me: ????

She: HE-(hic)........(hic)........

Reduced to hiccups by the sheer force of her "Hehs", thus ended our first mother-daughter chat!!!

When "Justice" Itself Is Injustice

2009-11-27T12:45:00.001+05:30

In the initial weeks after the 26/11 attacks, when Ajmal Kasab became the face of the worst terror strike our country has seen, a debate raged as to whether or not he deserved a fair trial.

I remember commenting on one blogger's furious tirade for him to undergo every physical torture possible, that, no matter how heinous the crime, the system had to be allowed to function; if we set a precedent of executing even one criminal without trial, slowly but steadily the system would lose meaning. So even though my gut reaction demanded that he be mercilessly crushed right away, my sanity reasoned that the justice system had to function.

In the year since, the justice system has "functioned", it has "functioned" to the extent of 31 crores, and is still "functioning".

31 frikkin CRORES!!!!

Thoughts of 26/11 haven't been far from any Indian's mind over the past few days, and one of the things I wondered about was how much it was costing to keep Kasab alive. But never did I imagine it would work out to 31 crores! And counting!!!

Yes, he absolutely deserved a fair trial, but come on, when the whole damn world knows he's guilty, how can it possibly take so long to sentence him??? How much more evidence, how many more witnesses does the court need??? The mind reels when it thinks of all the good uses that much money could've been put to.

Is our coastline better protected than it was last year?

Are our policemen better equipped than they were last year?

Are we more secure than we were last year?

NO.

But yes, Ajmal Kasab is better protected and more secure and probably more well-looked-after than he's ever been in his whole life, courtesy the Indian government. The system that should've dealt with this in a matter of months, if not weeks, has churned on for nearly a year, until the whole thing is nothing but a farce. This prolonged pursuit of justice itself is the greatest injustice being done.

No one is going to feel any better the day Kasab dies, because killing him doesn't bring back those lost that day. No one is going to heave a sigh of relief, because we know there are many more Kasabs out there. But Kasab must be killed, and must be killed soon, for no other reason than to stop this ridiculous drain of resources, resources which could be diverted elsewhere to actually accomplish something positive.

Keen on Clean: Thanks Mom & Dad!!!

2009-11-20T23:25:00.001+05:30

So this is one of those times when I've read something that just compels me to post immediately (or as 'immediately' as my lil baby will allow :D) I was casually bloghopping this morning, when I saw on someone's blogroll, a post with the intriguing title "No one ever thanked their mom in an acceptance speech for keeping the house clean".

I was ridiculously happy on reading it; I mean, there I was battling an oncoming headache, trying to think positive and keep it at bay and then I read this post, was grinning from ear to ear, all potential aches & pains vanquished!!! That's how great it feels to know that there are other people who take cleanliness very seriously, because as I have resignedly observed, most of the people I know, don't.

And I guess that's due to the fact that as Sraboney Ghose titled her post, no one ever thanked their mom in an acceptance speech for keeping the house clean. As my mother noted several times over the years, housework is a thankless job; there's no reward in it other than your own satisfaction of living in a clean home and the occassional recognition from those rare souls who think like you.

Growing up, both my parents raised us to be particular about cleanliness. We pitched into help and did whatever mom asked us to do (sometimes a bit later than when she wanted it done :D). We enjoyed living in our clean & beautiful home, but I have to admit that most of the time, especially in my younger years, I took it for granted. It was only towards the end of my teens and later that I really started observing other houses, seeing the very noticeable difference between others' and my home, and realizing the worth of my mother's tireless daily efforts.

But this post is not so much about her's or my dad's hard work, as it is about my response to it. Sraboney's post drove home a point: it struck me that, in comparison to how much sweat & blood they've given to the maintenance of our home, I haven't thanked them nearly enough. Sure, I've mentally thanked God countless times for parents like them, but I haven't said it to them as often as I should have.

I have been a homemaker for almost two years now and try daily to live up to the same values my parents instilled in me. I have an additional responsibility now of fostering the same in my little girl, and its easier said than done. Looking back at my own life, I know how many years it took me to realize what my parents had done (and are still doing!), let alone acknowledge & appreciate it.

My mother once said that its thanks enough when she comes to my home and sees that I'm living the way I was raised, that I run my home the way I was taught. But a verbal (or written!) expression of gratitude never hurt anyone, right?

I might never have a chance to deliver an acceptance speech in front of the world, so I guess my blog is as public as it gets for now. Nonetheless, Mom & Dad, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU FOR RAISING ME TO KEEP THE HOUSE CLEAN!!!

The Life Behind the Fiction

2009-11-14T23:45:00.000+05:30

It was through the magical writing of Enid Blyton that I first realised and appreciated the power of a book in transporting the mind to a different time & place. I have many happy memories of being curled up with one of her books, reading with delight, secretly longing to solve those mysteries, go on those rambling walks, attend those wonderful schools and of course, sneak away for a midnight feast or be a part of those amazing tea parties!!!!

So it was with an increasing sense of disillusionment that I read this article this morning, about a forthcoming biopic which describes the popular author as she really was.

First thought: how could the woman who created such wonderfully warm worlds be the complete opposite in person??? She is said to have been quite the adulteress, but what truly shocked me was her own daughter's description of her as "arrogant, insecure and without a trace of maternal instinct".

However, the article also states that the author's father left her mother & her when she was 12, and that emotionally, she remained a child. Writing was therefore her way of escaping that pain.

Every Enid Blyton work that I've read, I've loved. There is an innocence and purity in those stories, and nearly all the characters she developed have real integrity, so as a child, I guess I naively transferred those qualities to the woman behind them and that's the impression that remained till date.

Its difficult to reconcile the sweet, motherly person I'd imagined her to be with the reality revealed by that article. I feel sorry for the child she was and sorrier for the woman she made of herself. Its saddening to know that the stories I've treasured all these years stemmed from a desire to avoid a painful reality.

Someday, my daughter's bookshelf will definitely hold a collection of Blyton's best because I would love for her to experience the same wonder, the same sense of revelation and excitement those stories gave me. Will I relive them the same way though? Sadly, perhaps not.

A Tagful of Tasty Memories :)

2009-11-11T12:50:00.000+05:30

I've seen this tag on a few blogs and have elected to go ahead and do it, because complete and total foodie that I am, how could I pass up an opportunity to write about:

"Five memorable meals ever eaten: It could be anything that makes the meal memorable - the food, the place, the place you were in your life when you ate, the company, the weather, the ambiance - heck, the guy who served the food!"

In doing this tag, I face a problem of plenty. I come from a majorly foodie family and consider it one of my greatest blessings that I was born to the couple who're the best cooks in not only my family, but among all the families I know. So food has always been an integral part of my life, or rather, amazing food has always been an integral part of my life.

Understandably then, it becomes difficult to pick just five out of a lifetime of memorable meals, but it was a process I thoroughly savoured :D

1. Festive Meals - As long as we were based in Bombay (a timeframe which spans the first 22 years of my life), our routine for Christmas, New Year's & Easter was almost always the same. Breakfast was at home, a meal which in the later years was mom's homemade bread and roast chicken. Our mouths would start watering the day before with the house fragrant with the aromas of baking bread and roasting chicken! Lunch would be at my maternal grandparents' home where my grandmom would lay out a spread of Indian delicacies. I say "Indian" because she travelled all over India with my granddad and her cooking reflects that diversity in addition to the flavours of our native Kerala. The Christmas sweets post-lunch also were just as versatile. Dinner was at my paternal grandparents' home where my grandmom favoured Western flavours more. So we'd have a roast again, and she'd make a yummy stuffing to go with it. Surprisingly, what my sister & I both looked forward to were granny's salads, because the dressings would be 100% rich mayonnaise (not the healthy yoghurt like our mom usually made us eat!), and aside from the veggies, there'd be crunchy croutons (again, not on our mom's usual menu as its deep-fried bread), and of course, extremely generous chunks of cheese!!!

2. Murg Shifta at Ivy Restaurant - This is a place close to home in Bombay. We checked it out some years ago, and have been hooked since our first meal. My favourite is this heavenly, melt-in-your-mouth chicken kebab - the Murg Shifta. The first time I bit into one was the first time I was moved to tears by the sheer exquisiteness of food. Whenever we've visited Bombay after settling in the UAE, no matter what else needs to be done in the short time we're there, we ALWAYS eat from this restaurant. If we can't go there, then dad orders in advance and then picks up the food. This restaurant was also the setting where I had a meal with this dude who'd come to see me; food came second to the conversation that day as we each evaluated whether or not we could spend the rest of our lives together, though I made it a point to mention the Shifta and how it was a favourite :D I later married that dude, and when we visited Bombay post-marriage, we all went to Ivy again (or as he puts it, we returned to "the scene of the crime"!!!)

3. Stamp of Approval - My mom & grandmom came to visit us a few months after my marriage. As soon as she freshened up after reaching home, mom came straight to my kitchen to check out what I had prepared for dinner, and on seeing the dishes, she couldn't resist sampling one of them. As I had learnt how to cook only after marriage, this would be the first time she would taste a dish by yours truly. Though baking had become a passion some years before and she liked the cakes & desserts I made, I think its somehow different when it comes to the food you eat on a daily basis. So there I stood, making tea and watching with some nervousness as she took a bite of a chicken preparation - one of her recipes itself :). To my dying day, I will never forget that look of surprised admiration & pleasure that lit her face!!!

4. With My Oldest Friends - Most of our socialising in Bombay was with the families of my dad's two oldest friends. Their kids are my oldest friends and we've gotten together countless times at all our homes. The atmosphere is always comfortable & relaxed the way it is when everybody goes back donkey's years and every get-together was loads of fun. But there are two meals that especially stand out in my mind as I do this tag. The first was my 15th birthday party, which was just 11 days before my tenth standard board exams. When everybody else was feverishly cramming, we partied on till 3 a.m.!!! (And yes, I did do pretty well in the exams too :D) The second meal was a get-together when I visited Bombay in January this year. Hubby couldn't get leave, so I had gone alone. I knew I was pregnant, but as I hadn't seen a gynec yet, my parents & I didn't share the news with the others. That night, us "kids" played cards like we've done nearly all our lives, and we laughed and laughed with the same abandonment as when we all really were kids and even as I was laughing, I was filled with this bittersweet feeling that this would be the last time we were together like this. My life, at least, had changed forever, and the next time we would all meet, I'd have a kid of my own.

5. Thankful for the Blessing - The first trimester of my pregnancy brought on nausea so intense that for the first time in my life, the mere thought of food made me sick. The culinary sights & smells I'd savoured all my life suddenly became so unbearable that not only did I keep out of the kitchen, I'd stay shut in my room if somebody else was cooking. My diet was reduced to a chutney sandwich for breakfast and either a simple khichdi* or chapati** & curd for lunch and dinner. With my energy level at an all-time low, I couldn't make even these basic meals; first my parents, then hubby & my ma-in-law took over the kitchen. So the first day I re-entered my kitchen and was able to stand there and cook a decent meal was a huge blessing for me. As I made a proper, tempered dal*** and marinated mackerel for frying, I actually had tears in my eyes! I was that happy and that thankful to have regained my old strength and abilities, and I vowed then that I would never take them for granted.

So these are some of my most delicious memories :) Anyone else wanting to take a tasty trip down memory lane, feel free to pick up the tag!

* khichdi - rice, lentils (and vegetables if you want ..... I didn't!) cooked together.
** chapati - Indian flatbread.
*** dal - lentils cooked to a soup consistency.

Going Ga-Ga Over Gu-Gu!

2009-11-06T22:45:00.000+05:30

My baby girl is nearly 10 weeks old now, but even within this short span of time, she's changed (and changing!) so fast!!! Its not only her appearance, but also her personality. The near-silent, frail little child who only uttered the softest mewling cries post-birth is now a sturdier, bigger version who's not shy at all about being heard!

While previously she only tested her vocal range in terms of how loudly she could yell, these days she's started making those typically baby gurgling sounds and its the cutest thing ever!!!

Her word of choice as of now is "uh-gu" with the ocassional variation thrown in, so when she's awake & content, that's what our vocabulary gets reduced to :D We're gu-guing and gurgling and coochie-cooing, and sometimes (when we go a bit overboard, I think :D), she looks at us with this half-curious, half-amused expression almost as if she's thinking: "What the hell???? These guys are supposed to be the adults!!!"

But its not as if we're only indulging in baby talk; I've read about the importance of speaking to babies early on itself and so I keep talking to her just about everything and anything, not at all difficult if you're me ..... I can yammer on and on and relentlessly on ...... all in the hope of hearing one little "uh-gu" :) That's the sound that makes our day these days!

The Best of Us!!!

2009-11-02T15:30:00.000+05:30

I'd mentally started off on this post a hundred times, but floundered when it came to taking it forward. It wasn't for a lack of things to write about; rather, just like it happened after marriage, I feel waaaay too much for words to express.

So I'll just simply shout it out from the rooftop (or rather, my laptop :P), that

I have a DAUGHTER!!!!!

God!!!! I remember the first time I used the words "my daughter" in a conversation some weeks ago, I stopped mid-sentence, wondering if it had all really happened or if it was a dream. Well, it did really happen, so here's the when, where & how:

'When' was 31 Aug - she surprised us by arriving a week before the due date :) 'Where' was Bangalore and 'how' was a normal delivery (thank You God again!!!!), following a completely "uneventful" - to use the word from my medical file - pregnancy (more heartfelt thanks to God).

But while the pregnancy itself was uneventful, life in the last trimester and in the two months since certainly has been very eventful, hence the long absence from the blog. I missed this space terribly, missed writing, not to mention the dear friends I made here (thanks to all of you who enquired about us!), and I definitely will catch up with everyone soon. Now that I've put up this initial piece, hopefully the blogging will pick up pace again.

In the meanwhile, here's my darling little Kristyn, born a mini replica of her papa, but now slowly starting to look like me. Either way, she remains the best of us :D

On the Palm

2009-06-08T13:30:00.000+05:30

With a couple of occasions to celebrate, we joined up with my uncle & his family to do something a bit out of the ordinary over the weekend. We drove onto Dubai's famous Palm Jumeirah island to see the Atlantis resort (pictures uploaded on my photoblog).

Atlantis is the only commercial establishment there open right now; the rest are in varying stages of construction, currently stalled due to recession woes. The residential apartment complexes and villas are up and ready, and its nice to see from the monorail that runs the length of the Palm.

There are many attractions within the Atlantis, including its water park, aquarium and what I think is a dolphin show. I believe they have an area where you can swim with the dolphins and feed sting rays. Someday perhaps, it'd be fun to try, but in this murderously hot weather, none of us was game to be out in the open for too long. So we just rode the monorail and clicked loads of goofy photos with the resort as a backdrop.

Having lived in Bombay and Abu Dhabi, we're no strangers to reclaimed land, but I have to say, the Palm is certainly the most creative of them all and also the most controversial. On the one hand, it is a stupendous engineering feat, but on the other, the project has also drawn intense criticism for the resultant environmental damage.

I fell into the latter category initially, but having actually been there, I'm torn between both viewpoints; I can't decide if its a testament of human ingenuity for mastering a bit of Nature, or of human stupidity for messing too far with Nature.

Either way, it is a sight worth seeing at least once!

Spellbound: How It All Started

2009-05-30T15:15:00.000+05:30

April 2002.
It was almost the last week of our vacation in Dubai. We were staying at my aunt's place and on the particular weekday afternoon that this story begins, my uncle was at work, the older of my two cousins was at school, my parents were off browsing kitchen appliances or something, and since at 18, I didn't give a damn about cooking, I was stuck at home with my sister and the younger cousin running amok, and my aunt who was escaping for her siesta.

I had already emailed & chatted with my friends back in Bombay, the younger kids were getting on my nerves, there was nothing good on TV and what I was desperately craving was a good book. Reading has always been my favourite pastime and though there was a library just up the road, it would open only in the evening, meaning that I was facing a long afternoon of utter and complete boredom.

On arrival itself, I had checked out my cousin's book collection, but the reading choices of a 7-year old are obviously limited. I definitely didn't want to read Panchatantra or Aesop's Fables, and of Enid Blyton's many books, I've always preferred the school and mystery series over the magic tales on my brother's bookshelf.

But there was something else on that shelf, something that I'd already sneered at and then dismissed without another thought. On that afternoon though, Bored Beyond Belief, I reconsidered. An old friend's passionate pleas echoed in my head: You have to read it, you just HAVE TO.....its awesome!!! I had just as passionately argued back: its hocus-pocus for kids!!!! To which my friend emphatically declared that there was NOTHING kiddish about it!!!

Thinking some book was better than no book, I resignedly curled up on the sofa with Harry Potter & The Chamber of Secrets, and with a highly skeptical look on my face, I read ........ and read, and read, and read ........ till the next thing I knew, it was evening and my blissful solitude was shattered by everybody else returning home and making plans for dinner out.

How can I go out, I thought wildly. How would I find out who the heir of Slytherin was?? What if it were Harry himself??? What was this monster in the Chamber???? What if it killed off one of the characters, characters who, in just a few brief hours, I already thought of as friends.

And then an even worse thought struck me: what of the story after this book???? The fourth book in the series - Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire - had been released some months earlier and with it, Pottermania had hit India big time. I had scoffed at the fools who'd queued outside bookshops hoping against hope they'd be lucky to get a copy ...... but now I totally empathised!!!

My mother has always been against buying fiction, and she has a point: with us being members of two libraries, we usually got to read the latest books for a negligible monthly fee, and, most importantly for my mom, we didn't fill up precious storage space with books that we'd likely never re-read. So I knew there was no convincing her to let me buy the book. And the chances of getting a copy from the libraries back home any time soon were very, very slim, what with so many Potter fans around.

The only hope seemed to be the library up the road. I insisted on going there that very evening, though I still hadn't finished the second book. I practically ran there, hoping, yet not daring to hope too much in case it was all in vain. But, Hallelujah!!!! There they were, all four books in the series sitting pretty on a shelf!!!!

However, now I was in a dilemma: which to take??? The situation demanded some quick thinking and advance planning (Ma, you'd have been proud!!!) I knew for sure that the first book had been lying around in one library back home and since I'd already begun from the second book, I figured the first could wait some more. But I was still only halfway through the second ...... would I be able to finish the third and the fourth, which is a really chunky volume, especially since I had just a week, and that too with many outings planned???

I had to try, didn't I? :D

And with a single-minded determination that would've produced wonders had I applied it to academics, I gave my goal my all. Not stopping to savour the thrilling end of the second book, I dived straight into the third. But the leap to the fourth was not as direct; I had to go back and re-read the third book's climax, because it is just ....... beyond thrilling!!! My vocabulary can't do justice to just how shockingly brilliant it is, so lets leave it at that.

However, that little deviation cost me precious time: with everything else that was going on, we now had just two days left in Dubai, and the mighty Goblet of Fire loomed large before me. I was facing my single greatest reading challenge in the midst of more going out and the added burden of packing ........ and I can both proudly and humbly say, that I did it!!!! I finished reading Goblet of Fire in two days!!!

Back in Bombay, I caught the first Potter movie on TV before I could read the book (and someday perhaps I'll do a post on exactly why I loathe all the Potter films so much!), and eventually re-read the others too. My mother not believing in instant gratification, we had to wait a while for the fifth book; it arrived a few months after the release as a wonderful surprise gift from the parents :). Same with the sixth book. I was working when the last one released, so that was my treat to my sister & me.

April - May 2009.
By mutual agreement, my sister had kept the Harry Potter series. So naturally, on this visit home, reading the whole saga from start to finish was high on my list of things to do. I have lost count of how many times I've read them all in these past seven years; but on each occassion, the magic of J.K. Rowling's writing is still powerful enough to make me forget all other hobbies & interests. No other books have captured my imagination as completely as this lot, and I think that will be the subject of a future post - why I love this series so much. In the meanwhile, in the current reading session, I am off to embark on the final part of Harry's tale, as spellbound as I was the first time.

Not Just an Economic Crisis

2009-05-25T22:30:00.000+05:30

And so again after a visit to Renu's blog, I'm compelled to convert a comment into a post, because one thought led to another which led to a third ..... so on and so forth, till its just too long in the comment form.

Straight off, let me say that I struggled mightily with economics and finance in my formal education and still do not fully understand the intricacies of both. But what I do understand very clearly is this: you violate His laws, you will pay a price someday. As you sow, so shall you reap, or to borrow my sister's favourite acronym, JKVB - Jaisi Karni Vaise Bharni (and now look at the amazing coincidence that as I was going through some of my regular blogs, I came across Goofy Mumma's latest!)

In many places, I recall the current economic crisis being described as the failure of the capitalist philosophy. I disagree.

I see this crisis as the failure of regulatory authorities who should've ensured organizations didn't overstretch their limits. I see this crisis as a failure of organizations themselves in that they were over-ambitious. Most importantly, I see this economic crisis as an after-effect, the result of a much more deeper cause: a moral, ethical & spiritual failure.

Very simply, people got greedy.

Right from childhood, we're taught that greed is bad. In fact, Christianity considers it as one of seven deadly sins. Deadly sin. I find it really amazing that people get so immersed in their careers and money-making that they forget these basic truths along the way. Many will scoff at anything to do with religion & spirituality; they outright dismiss simple values as 'touchy-feely crap' and see them as having no connection to the "business world".

And yet, when this crisis first erupted, and companies - supposedly well-established industry giants - started collapsing one after the other, the first thing people ran towards was God. Churches, in New York City especially, reported record attendance as desperate souls from the corporate world turned to Him for some way out of the mess they'd gotten themselves into.

I repeat: you violate His laws, you will pay a price someday. You can't ..... restrict God to a slot in your life. You can't say, ok God, I'll come see you in so&so place of worship, I'll give some money to xyz charity and that's it, be happy with that, what I do in my job is my business, not Yours.

Many people (including some members of my own family), believe that their "security" and their "status" lies in the size of their bank balance. Everything else comes in second to the all-important goal of money. Instead of work being a part of life, it becomes their whole life, to the exclusion of God, their own health and personal relationships. So when you make that sort of uncontrolled greed your way of life ....... how do you expect to walk away unscathed? And for a crisis of this magnitude to have occurred, its not just a few people here and there who went astray, but entire generations, entire societies that are to blame.

Anything taken to an extreme is bad; so the fault does not lie in capitalism per se, but in the unchecked, unbridled capitalism and materialism. I still believe in the capitalist philosophy, so long as we operate within a moral and ethical framework at the individual and the larger organizational and societal levels.

The values of hard work, honesty, saving and spending within your means are extolled by most faiths, and they are meant to guide us in all aspects of life. They are NOT irrelevant or outdated in present times however "modern" we consider ourselves, and whatever our accomplishments, none of us is above them. Provided we adhere to these guidelines, we have every right to enjoy the fruits of our efforts.

More Money, More Faith?

2009-05-05T17:40:00.000+05:30

I got started on this post quite a few days ago when I read this terrific piece by Amrita, but with one thing and another, blogging took a backseat and I couldn't complete it with the same steam that I had begun. I also needed time to think, to do a little introspection and get my thoughts in order. I feel very passionately on these subjects and can be very vocal on them, so some distance was needed if I wanted to produce a coherent post. Hopefully, I've succeeded.

My first instinct right after reading Amrita's post was to rant about how people needlessly fritter small fortunes away on flowers, garlands, fireworks and other frivolities.

Does He really need them? In the grand scheme of things, what are a few flowers offered at any one place of worship when you compare it to the vast variety He Himself has created? And fireworks ..... the lakhs and lakhs spent on them! One explosion of sound, a few seconds worth of flash and glitter and poof! Its over. How does that match up to the unimaginable wonders that exist in His universe - the stars, the shooting stars, planets, comets, galaxies that have endured since beyond our comprehension?

But then a small voice in my head said: Don't I like attending mass in a clean church with fresh flowers and candles at the altar? Don't I appreciate the paintings, sculptures and other ornaments that adorn the interiors? Don't I get excited to see the extra lights and decorations at festivals? Don't I watch fireworks displays as enthralled as any child?

What about in my home itself? Don't I like to have a well-decorated altar? Don't I light candles and place flowers there? Don't I like to jazz up my home during festivals? Christ was born in a shabby little manger and there were definitely no sparkling lights, no shiny decorations around at that time ..... so why do I bother with them at Christmas?

Now let's move outside to the buildings themselves. Don't I pause to ooh and aah over a beautifully built church / temple / mosque or any other place of worship? The more exquisite the architecture and the embellishments, the more money involved in its construction. But as I gaze at them in awestruck wonder, do I care about how much it would have cost? Even if my thoughts turn to money, do I begrudge it, do I think it a waste? No ....... its for God, I'd say.

But can any human creation possibly compare to His creation???

So then why do we do it?

These things are a token of our faith, our humble efforts to honour God. I emphasize 'humble' because again, in comparison with His works, anything we do is just that - humble. And more importantly, these are mere tokens; they cannot be the sum & substance of our faith.

Many priests whose sermons I've had the privilege of hearing, constantly stressed the need to go beyond mere ritualism and tokenism and actually live our faith. This simply meant keeping the ideals of love, service and forgiveness paramount in all aspects of life, something I believe all the great religions of this world preach.

But sadly, many people seem to believe that the more money they spend on religious activities, the more God will be pleased with them. Its far, far easier to hand out some notes or write a cheque than it is to practice "love, service and forgiveness" in the daily grind of life. But ultimately, it isn't how much you have, but how you live your life that matters.

Its not that we shouldn't spend money at all on our religious functions; just as long as we remember that whatever we do, we do it to glorify Him, not to glorify ourselves. And as we spend, I think we should also remember that we are duty-bound to help those in need. There has to be a balance between celebrations, donations and trying to live our daily lives by His word for faith and worship to be truly meaningful.

Recipe: Fruit Teabread

2009-04-25T18:40:00.001+05:30

I love food and trying out new recipes, but as I've said before, I don't have the patience to blog about them. Usually.

But now that I'm at my parents' and the planning of daily tasks and menus is handled by my mother, my creative juices seem to be flowing stronger. Plus, with a proper oven here, I can fully indulge in my first culinary love - baking! So as I set about making this Fruit Teabread, I decided to put in the extra effort and share this recipe here because:

a. its incredibly easy and no-fuss: you don't need to bring out electric beaters / food processors, just simple hand mixing will do.

b. its very versatile: instead of the fruit, you could put dates or nuts like chopped almonds / walnuts, or you could do fruit and nut, or chuck it all and go wild with chocolate chips!!!

c. though the name says 'teabread', its closer to a cake, great for kids' tiffins or evening snacks (I made this one for my dad's teatime snack).

d. the way my mom showed me to make this, its healthy too!

FRUIT TEABREAD

DRY INGREDIENTS

- 300 g whole wheat flour (atta)
- 50 g oats
- 100 g unrefined sugar (read the Notes at the end of the post)
- 150 g dried fruit (or nuts etc. I used mixed peel, dried blueberries & cherries)
- 5 level tsp baking powder
- 1 tsp salt

WET INGREDIENTS

- 300 ml milk
- 60 ml ordinary vegetable oil
- 3 eggs, lightly beaten
- 1 tsp vanilla essence
- Few drops food colouring (totally optional, but the kid in me LOVES coloured cakes, so :D)

This makes 1 900 g loaf.

METHOD

1. Line a loaf tin with wax paper, or grease it with oil. *

2. Mix all the dry and wet ingredients separately.

3. Make a well in the centre of the dry ingredients, and pour the wet ones in.

4. Mix ONLY to the point where all the dry ingredients are coated. DO NOT overmix this. Also mix everything only when you're ready to bake; if you leave the batter standing too long before, the efficiency of the baking powder reduces.

5. Pour batter into prepared tin, and bake at 180 degrees C for 1 hour 25 min or till golden and pulling away from the sides.

6. Cool in the tin for 10 minutes, then turn it out onto a wire rack to cool completely.

* My loaf tin struggles to release the finished product, hence wax paper makes our life a lot easier. If your baking dishes are more well-behaved, just greasing them will be fine.

NOTES

1. This recipe was taken from the Good Housekeeping cookbook. The original calls for 350 g plain flour (maida) and 275 g sugar. But since my dad's diabetic, we try to make such dishes as nutritious as possible, without compromising on taste. And so I used lesser whole wheat flour (300g) to accomodate the oats (50g) as well. I drastically cut back on the sugar, as the dried fruits I was using would also add an element of sweetness, and it turned out sweet enough. But you can absolutely use the entire prescribed quantity of sugar, or lessen it and then add some honey / golden syrup into the wet ingredients.

2. The use of oil, instead of butter, is another plus on the health factor.

3. VERY IMPORTANT: The baking time listed was as per the original recipe. Ovens vary tremendously ....... my loaf was done in 50 minutes! Given the quantities, I think this teabread should take at least 30 min in most ovens, but do keep an eye on it from then on. If a skewer / toothpick inserted into the centre of the teabread comes out clean, its ready.

The Week That Was......

2009-04-18T16:05:00.000+05:30

...... was pretty much a whirlwind. On second thoughts though, ordinarily, it wouldn't really have been hectic, but with me halfway through my pregnancy, I tend to tire out a lot easily than before.

We landed in Kerala right before Easter and spent a few days with hubby's folks. The rainclouds came along with us, so we were at least spared the usual heat for the most part (but not the humidity :( ) There was one excellent thunderstorm, and I can say 'excellent' because obviously, I enjoyed it from the warm & dry comfort of home :)

Between an Easter dinner at a relative's place and an engagement, we had a lot of socializing to do. I've observed that Kerala socializing is still largely segregated on a gender basis, especially in smaller gatherings. So I spent most of the time talking to various aunties and ammachis *, swapping pregnancy stories - basically, who threw up and how much, what foods make us nauseous and so on :D

But the highlight of this trip was that I got a chance to get all decked up in one of my silk saris!!! Despite it being meltingly humid (and me eventually wishing I could take the sari off), I think I carried myself a lot better than in previous attempts, so yaaay on the gracefulness-in-a-sari front!!!

The next day saw me on a plane early in the morning, headed for my maika* (sadly alone; hubby's leave situation is such that we need to preserve it all for when the baby comes). I landed in Dubai by noon, and got off at the spanking new Emirates terminal.

Like most places here, its all bright-lights and sparkling-tile gloss. But what had me absolutely gobsmacked were these huuuuge elevators that take you down to the ground level to Immigration and Baggage Claim. I guess they could take 30-40 people at a time, and they're completely automated with doors that sound an alarm (like subway trains) before closing. I was maha-impressed by that!!!

I got out fairly quickly, and settled in for the drive to Abu Dhabi. Again, I was gobsmacked by the many, many changes I saw ...... and its just been some 7 months since I was last here! The construction on the Bangalore Metro (at least in the MG Road area) has been as is since I first saw it in early 2008; but the Dubai Metro has made such giant leaps forward since last August!!!

Even within Abu Dhabi emirate, there has been soooo much development. Skeletons of buildings already several storeys high are up where there was just plain desert last year. The most fascinating construction was this building near the Al Raha Mall - its in the shape of a circle!!! Whatever people may say about the UAE (and anyone who's lived here for any length of time can say a lot!), no one can deny that things move here. The autocratic government works to the extent that things happen, and they happen fast.

Anyway, with the travel and the impact of all these changes, it took me a couple of days to settle in. I'm here for a couple of months, in which time I hope to get into a good exercise regime (despite the tempting food options!), get out and see my old haunts which should, Inshallah, translate into some fresh photographs!!!

-------------
Ammachi - grandmom in Malayalam
Maika - a woman's parents' house in Hindi

The Tune Tag

2009-04-07T18:25:00.000+05:30

When Reflections tagged me to do this some days ago, I realised with a little jolt, that there's nothing at all on this blog about music. Pretty odd, considering how much it means to me. I learnt a couple of instruments till my teens and had a decent voice back then, but it was always listening to music that was ........ uplifting.

Uplifting. That's putting it mildly, but I had to struggle even to come up with that word. And that's perhaps why I've never written about music (despite requests from my equally music-mad better half to sometimes contribute to his blog too). I've almost always experienced music on the level of pure 'feeling', sometimes on an entirely spiritual plane, and its very difficult for me to translate that into words.

Looking back, the earliest memory I have of feeling the power of music is at age eight. My parents, grandparents, uncles & aunts were all watching a Malayalam film, His Highness Abdullah, starring the family favourite, Mohanlal. I was watching too, in parts, but I was more interested in playing with my sister. There's this one song, its like a contest between Mohanlal's character and a highly accomplished singing guru. I don't know the actual name of it; I refer to it as the 'Anandam' song because that's the word most repeated at the end.

When it first started up, I wasn't really listening. But as it progressed, it caught my attention. I was suddenly as engrossed as everyone else watching the movie. The changes in the melody and the raagas completely fascinated me, and by the time the song reached its climax, I was spellbound. I don't know who the other singer is, but K. J. Yesudas sang for Mohanlal, and the sheer power and passion of his voice and the melody towards the climax left me breathless. My throat felt tight, my heart ached, and I had shivers down my spine ...... but in the most beautiful way possible.

In terms of this tag, which requires you to list your 10 favourite Soulful, Slow & Melodious songs in any 2 languages, hubby told me that this Anandam song isn't exactly 'slow'. But among the very few Malayalam songs I've heard, it is certainly the most soulful & melodious, and holds a very special place in my heart (Nancy, this selection is for you, since you specially asked for it :))

Getting back to the main requirement of the tag, I'm listing 10 favourites in English and Hindi. Again, not all might meet the 'slow' description, since more than tempo, its the soul & melody of a song that grabs me. It took me a while to do this, because I was facing a problem of plenty: how do I restrict myself to just 10??? Anyway, here's my list, in no particular order:

ENGLISH

1. Unchained Melody - The Righteous Brothers
2. Everything I Do I Do It For You - Bryan Adams
3. Hallelujah - the Leonard Cohen & Rufus Wainwright versions
4. Hey Jude - The Beatles
5. Going Home - Dire Straits
6. Bridge Over Troubled Water - Simon & Garfunkel
7. Harvest Moon - Neil Young
8. May It Be - Enya
9. Father Figure - George Michael
10. Kiss From A Rose - Seal

HINDI

1. O Mere Dil Ke Chain -- Mere Jeevan Saathi
2. Zara Zara -- Rehna Hai Tere Dil Mein
3. Ajnabee Shehar -- Jaan-e-mann
4. Tum Se Hi -- Jab We Met
5. Tu Hi Re -- Bombay
6. Aksar -- Shaan (the singer, not the movie ...... its a lesser known track from one of his albums)
7. Dil Kya Kare -- I love both the original version by Kishore Da and Shaan's later take for Instant Karma.
8. Saaiyan -- Kailash Kher
9. Sar Kiye Yeh Pahar -- Strings (the best thing to come out of Pakistan)
10. Tere Khayalon Se -- Shankar Mahadevan

I now tag Amrita, Deeplydip, Mumbai Diva, Smriti and Thought Warp to do this.

The Success of Secular India

2009-04-02T11:45:00.000+05:30

My mom sent me the article below, entitled "Indians and Pakistanis are no longer the same people" by Vir Sanghvi. There was a time when I naively believed that we were the same - ordinary people with similar aspirations. But today, I believe we are the same only in that we are all human; however, as a nation, that collection of human beings has chosen a very different path, one that only leads downhill.

Despite that, I still wouldn't go to the extreme of saying that EVERY Pakistani is an India-hating, West-hating, Islamic fanatic, just as I don't believe that EVERY Indian is true to the idea of India.

Recent events, especially here in Karnataka, show a growing and alarming intolerance on religious, gender and linguistic grounds. Our neighbours across the border are a glaring example of just what intolerance can deteriorate into, so we, as a nation, need continual reminders to not stray onto that path, consciously or subconsciously.

Which is why I liked this article. It reminded me that all our successes and achievements, whether individually or nationally, are at least partly rooted in our national ideals of democracy, tolerance and most importantly, secularism.

*************

INDIANS AND PAKISTANIS ARE NO LONGER THE SAME PEOPLE

by Vir Sanghvi, Hindustan Times, The Mint

The same people? Surely not.

Few things annoy me as much as the claim often advanced by well-meaning but woolly-headed (and usually Punjabi) liberals to the effect that when it comes to India and Pakistan, "We're all the same people, yaar."

This may have been true once upon a time. Before 1947, Pakistan was part of undivided India and you could claim that Punjabis from West Punjab (what is now Pakistan) were as Indian as, say, Tamils from Madras.

But time has a way of moving on. And while the gap between our Punjabis (from east Punjab which is now the only Punjab left in India) and our Tamils may actually have narrowed, thanks to improved communications, shared popular culture and greater physical mobility, the gap between Indians and Pakistanis has now widened to the extent that we are no longer the same people in any significant sense.

This was brought home to me most clearly by two major events over the last few weeks.
The first of these was the attack on the Sri Lankan cricket team on the streets of Lahore. In their defence, Pakistanis said that they were powerless to act against the terrorists because religious fanaticism was growing. Each day more misguided youngsters joined jihadi outfits and the law and order situation worsened.

Further, they added, things had got so bad that in the tribal areas the government of Pakistan had agreed to suspend the rule of law under pressure from the Taliban and had conceded that sharia law would reign instead. Interestingly, while most civilised liberals should have been appalled by this surrender to the forces of extremism, many Pakistanis defended this concession.

Imran Khan (Keble College, Oxford, 1973-76) even declared that sharia law would be better because justice would be dispensed more swiftly! (I know this is politically incorrect but the Loin of the Punjab's defence of sharia law reminded me of the famous Private Eye cover when his marriage to Jemima Goldsmith was announced. The Eye carried a picture of Khan speaking toJemima's father. "Can I have your daughter's hand?" Imran was supposedly asking James Goldsmith. "Why? Has she been caught shoplifting?" Goldsmith replied. So much for sharia law.)

The second contrasting event was one that took place in Los Angeles but which was perhaps celebrated more in India than in any other country in the world. Three Indians won Oscars: A.R. Rahman, Resul Pookutty and Gulzar.

Their victory set off a frenzy of rejoicing. We were proud of our countrymen. We were pleased that India's entertainment industry and its veterans had been recognised at an international platform. And all three men became even bigger heroes than they already were.

But here's the thing: Not one of them is a Hindu.

Can you imagine such a thing happening in Pakistan? Can you even conceive of a situation where the whole country would celebrate the victory of three members of two religious minorities? For that matter, can you even imagine a situation where people from religious minorities would have got to the top of their fields and were, therefore, in the running for international awards?

On the one hand, you have Pakistan imposing sharia law, doing deals with the Taliban, teaching hatred in madrasas, declaring jihad on the world and trying to kill innocent Sri Lankan cricketers. On the other, you have the triumph of Indian secularism.

The same people? Surely not.

We are defined by our nationality. They choose to define themselves by their religion.

But it gets even more complicated. As you probably know, Rahman was born Dilip Kumar. He converted to Islam when he was 21. His religious preferences made no difference to his prospects. Even now, his music cuts across all religious boundaries. He's as much at home with Sufi music as he is with bhajans. Nor does he have any problem with saying 'Vande Mataram'.

Now, think of a similar situation in Pakistan. Can you conceive of a Pakistani composer who converted to Hinduism at the age of 21 and still went on to become a national hero? Under sharia law, they'd probably have to execute him.

Resul Pookutty's is an even more interesting case. Until you realise that Malayalis tend to put an 'e' where the rest of us would put an 'a,' (Ravi becomes Revi and sometimes the Gulf becomes the Gelf), you cannot work out that his name derives from Rasool, a fairly obviously Islamic name.

But here's the point: even when you point out to people that Pookutty is in fact a Muslim, they don't really care. It makes no difference to them. He's an authentic Indian hero, his religion is irrelevant.

Can you imagine Pakistan being indifferent to a man's religion? Can you believe that Pakistanis would not know that one of their Oscar winners came from a religious minority? And would any Pakistani have dared bridge the religious divide in the manner Resul did by referring to the primeval power of Om in his acceptance speech?

The same people? Surely not.

Most interesting of all is the case of Gulzar who many Indians believe is a Muslim. He is not. He is a Sikh. And his real name is Sampooran Singh Kalra.

So why does he have a Muslim name?

It's a good story and he told it on my TV show some years ago. He was born in West Pakistan and came over the border during the bloody days of Partition. He had seen so much hatred and religious violence on both sides, he said, that he was determined never to lose himself to that kind of blind religious prejudice and fanaticism.

Rather than blame Muslims for the violence inflicted on his community - after all, Hindus and Sikhs behaved with equal ferocity - he adopted a Muslim pen name to remind himself that his identity was beyond religion. He still writes in Urdu and considers it irrelevant whether a person is a Sikh, a Muslim or a Hindu.

Let's forget about political correctness and come clean: can you see such a thing happening in Pakistan? Can you actually conceive of a famous Pakistani Muslim who adopts a Hindu or Sikh name out of choice to demonstrate the irrelevance of religion?

My point, exactly.

What all those misguided liberals who keep blathering on about us being the same people forget is that in the 60-odd years since Independence, our two nations have traversed very different paths.

Pakistan was founded on the basis of Islam. It still defines itself in terms of Islam. And over the next decade as it destroys itself, it will be because of Islamic extremism.

India was founded on the basis that religion had no role in determining citizenship or nationhood. An Indian can belong to any religion in the world and face no discrimination in his rights as a citizen.

It is nobody's case that India is a perfect society or that Muslims face no discrimination. But only a fool would deny that in the last six decades, we have travelled a long way towards religious equality.

In the early days of independent India, a Yusuf Khan had to call himself Dilip Kumar for fear of attracting religious prejudice. In today's India, a Dilip Kumar can change his name to A.R. Rahman and nobody really gives a damn either way.

So think back to the events of the last few weeks. To the murderous attack on innocent Sri Lankan cricketers by jihadi fanatics in a society that is being buried by Islamic extremism. And to the triumphs of Indian secularism.

Same people?
Don't make me laugh.

Recipe: My Favourite Dip!

2009-03-31T16:00:00.002+05:30

I am very passionate about food, I am very passionate about cooking, and I am very passionate about finding and sharing recipes. Sadly, that passion doesn't have the patience to note measurements (or take step-by-step photos!) as I cook so that I can share them with the blog world. Which is why I sincerely admire bloggers who do, like Renu, A and my more recent discovery - Lan. Kudos to you for your food blogs!!!

Anyway, even without precise measurements, I am still going ahead and sharing the following recipe here. Can't take credit for it; that goes entirely to my mom. I call it Herbed Cheese Dip; you can call it whatever you like :) And as it says in the title, this is one of my absolute favourite dips. Some of the reasons a particular recipe becomes a favourite is one, obviously because its yummy beyond belief :), two, because its incredibly easy, three, because its versatile and completely open to personal interpretation.

What I mean by the last point is that you can use this dip in many ways, and that the amount of specific ingredients depends entirely on your taste; use more or less of anything, as you like. So here it is:

HERBED CHEESE DIP

Ingredients:

1/2 cup feta cheese (or regular cheddar blocks / slices if feta's unavailable)
1 tsp mayonnaisse (healthier substitute: plain yoghurt)
1 green chilli deseeded (keep the seeds if you like the heat)
1 garlic clove (use more if you like the flavour)
5-6 mint leaves (or coriander, or both; again, use more as per taste)

Method:

Blitz all ingredients in mixie / blender till you get a smooth paste.

And that's it!!! Some important notes though:
- If you're using yoghurt, add it gradually till you get the consistency you like; if you add too much straight off, it might get too watery.

- You definitely don't need extra salt in this if you're using feta cheese; you probably won't with cheddar either, so taste the dip & then add salt if needed.

- This'll keep in an airtight container in the fridge for a few days.

Serving Suggestions:

1. The dip itself is vegetarian, but it goes well with all kinds of food like french fries, bhajis, potato chips, fried chicken, fish fingers etc.

2. If you make the paste a bit thicker using less mayo or yoghurt, you can use it as a spread for sandwiches, great for lunch boxes or a kids' party. For adults, you can spread it on crackers or Monaco biscuits and garnish attractively and voila! you have a canape ready!

3. If you have leftover white meat (not in curry form though!), you can blend it in too for a nice, chunky paste.

Enjoy!!!

Who Am I?

2009-03-25T12:55:00.002+05:30

My masters' degree dissertation required me to do a lot of reading on workplace diversity, and then on culture, cross-cultural management, sociology, psychology and other related areas. I'll be the first to say that the final product wasn't the most sound piece of research, but what I'll eternally be grateful for is the knowledge I gained in the process.

In a word, it was mind-broadening. Not only in terms of a better understanding of why people differed culturally, but most importantly, in terms of a better understanding of myself.

Much of the material prompted me to introspect, to analyse the way I perceived and interpreted the world. It forced me to confront my prejudices, to realise that though I believed in equality, I too had racist, sexist and all other discriminatory -istic tendencies in me. But perhaps the most valuable insight was a clearer understanding of my identity -- who I am.

I didn't just randomly decide to do a post on identity; it was this thought-provoking piece by Renu that set off the introspection again. Although her post largely centers on women retaining their maiden names post marriage as part of their identity, it got me thinking about the whole issue of identity itself.

What makes up a person's identity? We each get some parts of our identity simply by being born wherever we were - we're instantly a part of a family, a society, a nation. But I think for the most part, our identity is how we choose to define ourselves, what we choose to make of ourselves.

Most people go through life without a clear understanding of their identities; they just go with the flow because that's just how things are, or feel compelled to be whatever the current media trend tells them they should be because they want to fit in. I think its just a handful of people who're lucky to instinctively know who they are. Most of us have to grapple with the issue for a long time till we arrive at that understanding.

For me, it was this particular exercise that really helped me clarify my identity. While some things were immediately obvious, I still took a few days to sort through it, but the end result was a renewed self-confidence and a sense of being at peace with myself, and that's why I wanted to share it here ....... maybe it'd be just as useful to you. I don't remember now exactly where I read it or whose concept it is (I think it was put forth by an American college professor to his students, but I'm not sure).

Basically, you divide a circle into segments representing the most vital components of your identity; the size you give each segment depends on its importance to you. (In case you wondered, no, this drawing is not a representation of my identity :), its just an illustrative example.) The dimensions here are what most people tend to include; you may want to add / subtract, again based on what you consider important.

And that, really, is one of the key conclusions of this exercise: to realise what is important to you. For many women today, the main identity clash seems to be between that of family and career. I know that prioritising one over the other can be incredibly difficult; indeed for anyone, prioritising various aspects of your identity, deciding which is more important than the others is not easy.

But its not as if you need to rank them or anything, because different situations in life call for different facets of your identity to come to the fore. In some circumstances, you'll have to put work first, sometimes you may need to put your child's need before that of your spouse, if you're watching a sports event you'll cheer or boo as a citizen of whatever country, if you read about atrocities committed anywhere you feel for the victims simply because you're human too.

So the point of the exercise is purely to determine the aspects of your identity that matter to you. What is it that fulfills you? What brings you satisfaction? What is it that really makes you happy? Because isn't that ultimately the point of life, to improve as a person and to find happiness? And how better to get there than by starting out with a clear understanding of who you are.

*******

For the curious: who am I??? I have and always will be a faith-and-family-first kind of person, happy and proud to be an Indian woman. I try my best to live up to 'Shalom' - its the Hebrew word for 'peace' from which my real name is derived. I tend towards artistic pursuits, so getting better at writing, cooking, painting, photography matters a lot. I've never been the career-driven type, though getting a good education was important, and I'm currently gearing up to face the biggest challenge of my life, and what will become the most important part of my identity for a long, long time - being a good mom!

Hello New Blues!!!

2009-03-22T22:30:00.000+05:30

Yesterday was the first time I set foot in a department store in over two months - quite a break for a weekend-window-shopping-loving person. We headed straight to the baby & maternity-wear section, and it was such a thrill to see all the teeny-tiny lil clothes!!! Even the outfits for older kids were so unbelievably cute ...... ah, to be a child today!!!!!

But then we got down to the business at hand - getting the mama some clothes :) The maternity-wear selection was very basic at this particular store, but to my absolute delight ........ there was a pair of jeans very similar to my old favourites!!! I tried them on, and man, I cannot describe how incredibly comfortable they were!!!

In fact, I would recommend that if, like me, you struggle with a lil extra tummy weight (even ordinarily!), go in for a pair of maternity-wear jeans, seriously!!!

Bye-bye Blue Jeans

2009-03-17T19:30:00.002+05:30

During the past couple of months, I made hay while the sun shone (and even when it didn't!): everytime we went out, I wore my more form-fitting tops ........ coz who knows when I'll be able to fit into them again??? No more right now, as I realised a couple of days earlier trying one of them on ...... the tummy has already begun its outward push!

So yesterday, I decided to reorganize one of my cupboard shelves, stacking the slimmer tees in the back. Also resigned to the back were some pants and capris, among them being my favourite blue jeans.

Now this may seem silly, but I actually had a lump in my throat as I folded this pair up. I've had them for maybe five years now, and they've been the absolute best pair of jeans I've ever owned! Dark blue, bootlegged, comfortable stretch denim that fit faithfully through thick and, ummm, not-so-thick ...... (sigh!)

I knew the last time I wore them (which was about a month ago), that it would be the last time I wore them ...... for a while at least. I was ok about it at the time, but yesterday, actually packing it off, it was like saying goodbye to a dear friend.

It was then that I realised that they were pretty much a constant companion over the last five years. Though I wear all kinds of clothing, I'm most comfortable in t-shirts & jeans, and this particular pair were the most comfy. I wore them every other week and took them with me on every trip, long or short.

And what I loved best about them was that they're not an overpriced, over-hyped "brand"; I'd bought them from a small store in Bombay for around Rs. 600-700 and despite being well-used, they're still going strong, unlike the crap from Lee / Levis which costs double that, but starts fraying out in a year (personal experience!) Comfort, style and value - all my purchase requirements met, making it one of my best buys!

Anyway, its time to move on to preggy-proofing my wardrobe now. Maternity-wear fashion is gearing up in India right now; I've seen ads of some really smart designs so hopefully I should have a lot of options that'll make the shopping fun! Top priority: a pair of comfy pants to replace my jeans ....... temporarily!

And to my beloved blues - we WILL get back together someday!!!

Great Expectations

2009-03-10T10:40:00.001+05:30

I began this year, determined to stay optimistic and positive. But have you ever noticed, that the moment you take some important decision is exactly when life / fate / God puts you to the test? Its like He thinks, hmmm, so Shalom has decided to do so & so; well, lets see how she handles this. And BAM!!! Something happens that tests that decision's strength to its limits and my optimism flies out the window.

I am not naturally optimistic. In fact, I am the exact opposite, a total pessimist. I came to this self-realisation in college, and was quite disappointed because I'd always believed myself to be the "glass is half full" type of person. Its easy to be so when things are going great, but when problems hit, or any challenge comes my way, I realised that my instinctive reaction is full-on panic. I immediately think of everything that could possibly go wrong, and how completely unprepared and unable I am to deal with the situation.

But then I also realised something else: after the force of that initial panic ebbs a bit, I pray, and prayer and effort get me through the challenge quite well. So that's my modus operandi, that's how I function. I don't deny the panic, but I don't let it stay too long either (and here, fans of Lost might recall the pilot episode where Jack describes something similar, but I'm digressing, so back to the topic). I have to fight off the panic, I have to consciously choose to be optimistic and say, yes, I can do this, and I can do it well.

So now back to the start of 2009, where I was revelling in my optimism and the strength of my faith. Just a day later, and something happened, or rather didn't happen, that put a dent in my optimistic armour. Over the next few days, that dent became a mighty gash, and I panicked like I've never panicked before, all thoughts of optimism forgotten. I actually questioned God, why are you doing this to me NOW? We had had other plans in place, big plans, so how were we going to manage this ..... situation, along with all that???

I broke down in front of hubby, who bravely comforted me, suppressing his own worries in the face of my obvious distress. His one solution for me if I'm in doubt, is to talk to my mother who'll put us in a right perspective. And as always, talking to her helped control that panic, and then hubby & me both felt comforted. Practical as ever, she said we didn't know anything for sure as yet, and even if what we suspected turned out to be true, we could indeed manage it quite well.

Thus bolstered, I went ahead with my trip to Bombay, eager to see my mom, dad and sister. A couple of days later, something happened in the morning that completely clarified the situation - I threw up. Very resignedly, I then accepted it: I was pregnant.

After that, the changes hit almost instantly. Barely three hours into a shopping trip, I, who could happily spend a whole day shopping, suddenly turned to lead, plopping down in the nearest chair. I, who have always been a foodie, couldn't bear the sights or smells of most foods. I would bolt from the room if mom started cooking. I could keep down merely a fraction of my usual quantity of food. And though the number of times I actually threw up were very less, I spent hours feeling miserably nauseous.

When we returned to Bangalore, I went to see a gynec. At my first ultrasound scan, I lay down, and was craning my head to see the screen, not that there was anything much to be seen. I thought I could distinguish this line, so I asked the doc whether that was it. She said yes, that's your baby, and its about a centimeter big right now.

Oh, I thought, okay. She rolled the sensor thingy some more over my tummy, pressed a few keys on her keyboard, and then all of a sudden, this steady thump, thump, thump filled the room ...... and my mind went blank. I knew what I was hearing ........ but I had never imagined, never thought that there would be a heartbeat this early. Barely a centimeter big, but with a heart that thumped away strong and sure at 123 beats per minute!

Till that point, I think I'd been completely overwhelmed by the sheer responsibility we faced and how we would go about managing it; I was grappling with the nausea and crying jags so much so that I hadn't really thought about the baby itself.

Only after hearing that heartbeat, did it strike me that this is not a thing or a situation, its a new life, a new person. Hubby's best friend had a baby some months ago, and we just dote on that kid. I used to look at the new parents, and the pure love on their faces as they held their son or played with him, or just looked at him, moved me very deeply. I thought of all my blog friends here who are mothers, and the way you write about your children regardless of their ages, with so much love and joy ......

..... and it started dawning on me that we had been blessed!!!

The panic and the worry subsided then, for both hubby & me, and we started getting excited about our child. I won't say that its been all hunky-dory since then, because I went through the most intensely awful nausea, and its only in the past couple of weeks that its started to phase off. That affected my mood at times too, and it was again a struggle to not sink into a pessimistic slump.

But then, my family used to pep me up, and I would try to focus on my blessings to fight off the gloom: that we could conceive so easily when there are couples we know who have struggled to; that my parents happened to be here when we first found out and they eased hubby & me into this stage; that my mom-in-law then stayed with us a month taking care of us; that other than the nausea, I have had no serious problems ....... and so, managed to hold on to that optimism.

Last week, I completed my first trimester. This time, at the ultrasound, there was no need to strain to see anything as the image on screen was quite clear - head, body and limbs ...... our child, fully formed!!! And to our surprise, very active too, though I can't feel it yet since its only about 3 inches big! By God's grace, baby & I are both healthy so far, and I pray, and request your prayers too that we remain so.

Phew!!! Sometimes I still can't believe it ...... I'm going to be a mother!!!!!

Unforgettable: From the Oscars Red Carpet

2009-02-20T16:00:00.003+05:30

The biggest film awards show on the planet is a few days away, and I'm more excited about who wears what, rather than who wins what. Its great fun to check out the showstoppers, the showfloppers and the in-betweens ...... even my always-been-a-tomboy-don't-care-about-fashion lil sister enjoys commenting on the stars' attire!

But then barely a couple of days later, we've forgotten all about those dresses and moved on to the next big event. However, in the past two years at the Oscars, there have been two gowns that I have not forgotten. Or more accurately, not forgotten because of who was wearing them.

I haven't seen any of Helen Mirren's movies (except for Raising Helen and National Treasure 2, which don't count since she had minor roles in both), and am not really sure if I want to see The Queen, for which she won Best Actress at the 2007 Oscars. In fact, I hadn't even heard of her before she was nominated. But one look at her on the red carpet that evening and she made a lasting impression.

Here's Helen Mirren again at the 2008 Oscars.

I was completely speechless when I saw her ..... isn't she just stunning for someone in her 60s??? Sexy and classy, I felt she was the best-dressed lady at both events, totally outshining the younger lot.

I'm largely clueless about the fashion world, unlike my friend Deeplydip, so I have no idea who the designers are, or who supplied the accessories. I just know that despite seeing so many red carpet shows since that time, and forgetting still many more outfits, I still vividly recall Helen Mirren dazzling the eye in these two gowns.

And as so many female commentators noted at the time, I too hope I look that good when I grow up! Or even half as good!!!

Revealed: 25 Things About Me!

2009-02-18T12:45:00.001+05:30

For a communications class in college, we were asked to first talk about someone we loved for 5 minutes. Everybody managed it easily, going and on and on about whoever they chose. Then, we were asked to talk about ourselves for 5 minutes, and all of us were stumped after 1 minute. There were a lot of ummms and aaahs and other noises as we struggled to come up with things to talk about.

Point of the exercise: to realise that its very difficult for most people to just talk about themselves.

This incident came back to me as I was doing this "25 Things About You" tag passed on by Goofy Mumma a while ago (thanks again, GM :D). I love tags, and normally I come back with answers straight away, but that's the thing ...... you have to have questions first. This business of randomly talking about yourself is really hard! I've been thinking over this for 5 days now, eagerly jotting down things as they struck me, and finally, its done!

So, the rules:

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

And now, about me:

1. I'm a chocoholic.
2. I have a valid driver's license, but don't know to drive ....... yes, this happens only in India!!!
3. I have conversations with myself within my head, because if I talked to myself out loud, people might think I'm crazy :P
4. In school, I spent a week sitting in the corridor outside class with a bunch of friends - we'd been punished for talking too much and this is the one school achievement I'm proudest of!
5. I'm not at all an athletic person, I suck at most sports and games.
6. I started talking before the age of 1 and according to one relative, I haven't shut up since!!!
7. I LOVE junk jewellery.
8. I hate rainy, cloudy, gloomy weather, though I do enjoy a good thunder & lightning storm, but only if I'm indoors.
9. Most people's first impression of me is that I'm serious, studious and reserved ...... hee, hee, hee!!!
10. My favourite form of exercise is walking, but I don't care for treadmills and gyms; if I have the choice, I'd rather walk out in the open.
11. I would love to learn to play the guitar someday.
12. I love applying mehendi. As a child, I was so dedicated to getting the darkest colour possible, I'd keep it on all night and to avoid it falling off or staining the pillows, I slept with my hennaed hand wrapped in plastic!
13. I am immensely intrigued by the great civilizations and mysteries of the past; I love books and films based on these themes, and ......
14. ....... the one book I found absolutely un-put-downable was The DaVinci Code - I bunked college one day so I could read it at a stretch.
15. I am a total wimp when it comes to amusement park rides; even the minor ones leave me with such head-spinning, tummy-churning nausea that there's nothing amusing about it, but .....
16. ..... I have para-sailed!!! The initial lift-off makes you feel like your stomach will fall out, but after that its just awesome!!!
17. I had tears in my eyes when I finished reading the Deathly Hallows the first time!
18. I've always felt that there is an actress suppressed in me. Am I talking heroine material? Hell, no!!! I'd love comic roles; people like Whoopi Goldberg, Paresh Rawal, Rajpal Yadav and Philomena (of Malayalam cinema) are my idols :D :D
19. I cannot endure horror films.
20. At some point in my teens, I realised that I could either have food or have a figure. I chose food!!!
21. I am not the impulsive, risk-taking type; I not only look before I leap, I conduct in-depth analyses!
22. I started watching football in the 12th standard only because of a massive crush on Luis Figo, and then got swept away in the frenzy of the game itself. I still don't know most of the rules, but will religiously watch most major international football events.
23. The only person in the whole, wide world who can send me from the calmest, most cheerful of moods straight into a raging temper in 5 minutes, is my beloved sister :D
24. The one, all-important motto I try to live by is "Love one another as you love yourself".
25. At looonng last, the 25th item!!! And that is ....... I turn 25 this month!

And now, about passing this on. I want to know more about Agnes, Amrita, Moi, My Space, Renu and Smriti.

The Weight of Happiness

2009-02-11T12:00:00.000+05:30

Written last week, posted today thanks to the ever-unreliable services of BSNL.
------------------------

I suppose most women tend to be at their slimmest best for their weddings.

Not me.

I'd finished my dissertation - nearly a year's worth of sitting in front of the computer, my mind at work 24x7, constantly needing food-fuelling to maintain my momentum. After that, I landed a job with a 10-hour workday, again pretty much seated at a desk the whole time. Somewhere along the line, I met the man I would marry and due to various practicalities and constraints, our wedding date was fixed a scant three months later.

November was my last month at work, as I'd wanted to spend a month's quality time with my family. However, that month also brings Christmas along, highlighted by my mom's superb cooking and Christmas cakes and goodies. So even though I tried to compensate by going for walks regularly, the ultimate result was still that, at the time of my wedding, I was the plumpest (objectively, I still wouldn't say 'fattest'!) I'd ever been in my life. That's how my in-laws and the rest of hubby's huge extended family saw me for the first time, and by Kerala standards where big is beautiful, I was alright!

A few days later, after all the festivities were completed and it was just hubby & me here in Bangalore, I assumed the responsibilities of a homemaker and life settled into a happy routine.

Cut to May 2008.

My mom and her mom were coming for a week-long visit. At the airport, I rushed forward eagerly once I spotted mom, and the first thing she said as she hugged me was, "Baby, you've lost so much weight!"

"Huh", I said. "Really? Oh, I hadn't noticed."

And as strange as it may seem, I truly hadn't. It was only after my mother, who's seen me all through these years, told me that I'd lost weight, did I realise that I'd finally achieved a goal I'd been pursuing (albeit not very determinedly!) since the age of 16. Only after she told it to me, did I realise that my pants & jeans were slipping down my waist, certain loose-fitting tops and kurtis hung limply on me, and t-shirts that once had me sucking my tummy in, now fit smoothly and without any added effort from me :D

I was thrilled!!! I was beyond thrilled, I was ecstatic!!! I had finally, FINALLY done it, though unintentionally. How??? I kept asking myself. I walked regularly and played table tennis with hubby a few times a week, but surely that couldn't compare to say, the two month aerobics classes, or the three-month intense gym workouts that I'd once done (neither of which resulted in any significant weight loss).

Nor was I dieting - for a foodie like me, whose entire set of 32 teeth are really sweet, 'diet' is a bad, bad word. Some might think I was stressed out, or moping coz I was away from my family for the first time, but no, that wasn't it; I was happily married, blissfully thankful for the life I had and anyway, when I'm stressed, I pig out.

So how then? Observing my lifestyle, mom said it was simply that I was active throughout the day ..... I wasn't sitting at a desk for hours together, I was constantly moving about, cooking or puttering around the house, and that, she said, was making the real difference, of course, supplemented by the walks and table tennis.

And I was thrilled!!! I was beyond thrilled, I was ecstatic!!! Did I write this before??? Hell, yes, but I don't care because that's how ecstatic I am!!!

BUT.......

I was in the minority, the very small minority of people who were thrilled. On subsequent trips to hubby's hometown, everybody's first comment was how much weight I had lost, and all conversation would revolve around that for the next few minutes. Initially, hubby's parents kept berating him, that he wasn't taking enough care of me etc etc, till I sat his mom down, and clearly explained the above saga to her. She was sort of convinced then, but how do you explain it to scores of neighbours, friends and relatives, all firmly conditioned to think that a new bride losing weight like this surely means problems in the marriage?

And if I thought that it was only in Kerala that my weight would be an issue, man, was I in for a rethink! Friends and relatives in the UAE and more recently in Bombay were flabbergasted! Most people found it incredibly difficult to get over. Some of my more outspoken buddies exclaimed outright: "She's not happy!" with a sort of perverse glee (hmmm, I should seriously reconsider these friendships!)

Even after the initial few minutes of explanations, when the conversations were like an hour old, I would get quiet, serious-faced questions: "You're sure you're ok, na?", "There are no problems with your husband, right?" And so on and so forth.

Only four people in Bombay, seemed genuinely delighted by the slimmer me and told me that I looked great. Only one college friend disagreed with the rest, and said of course she's happy, look at her smile, she's glowing from within!

Obviously, I did expect reactions to my weight loss, but somehow I’d naively assumed that my friends would be happy for me. I certainly didn’t expect everyone’s parting comments as they hugged me goodbye to be along the lines of “Next time we see you, you should’ve put on some weight”. What the hell??!!

Even though I’ve lost weight, I still cannot be considered thin, nor do I ever want to ..... I rather like my curves :) And its not that I’m looking hollowed out or miserable; hubby & my family are my most brutally honest critics and they’re totally ok with my appearance. Most importantly, I am totally ok with it!!!

Honestly, I don’t expect this phase to last very long, I know that eventually I will gain more weight and I’m totally ok with that too. But still, it feels fantastic that at least for once in my life, I produced some head-turning, eye-popping, jaw-dropping reactions!!!

And I am thrilled!!! I am beyond thrilled, I am ecstatic!!!

In case you were wondering what the fuss is all about, I lost 9 kilos last year!

Back from the Break!

2009-01-30T23:15:00.000+05:30

I'll be the first to say that I've been a sloppy blogger lately. Three weeks since my last post, and not for a lack of things to write about. Much has happened, and I guess I've just been sorting my thoughts out.

My family had come down to India for a couple of weeks. We spent the first week at home in Bombay, a continuous bustle of activity, first in getting the house cleaned up (and then making sure it remained that way through the rest of the stay!), then in meeting relatives and old friends, squeezing in the all-important shopping whenever we could, and sometimes, just taking a breather and chilling out at home, enjoying each other's company again :)

We each rummaged through our cupboards and cabinets, going over stuff that we'd deemed to have too much sentimental value to throw out; wiped off the dust that had covered them during the past year, and then returned them to their places ..... to gather more dust during 2009!

I pulled out our old photo album collection, and we pored over the memories. My sis & I shuddered over some truly disastrous and censorable childhood pictures of the two of us and I fortunately managed to sneak them out; it was sis's job to hide them in a place where our doting parents wouldn't find them and be tempted to show them around {shudder, shudder}.

That week passed by all too quickly and before we knew it, it was bye-bye Bombay and Hello Bangalore. The new, sparklingly spacious airport at Bangalore seriously impressed the family, coming as we were, from the depressing dullness of the Bombay domestic terminal (they told me the international airport had deteriorated still further ..... sigh!)

I had braced them for the long drive home, given that we live quite far from the new airport and we'd arrived during the evening rush hour. But surprisingly, it took only two hours to reach home (I had expected three!).

Hubby had neatened and tidied up our apartment for his in-laws, and my family were quite impressed with all the decor improvements we'd made to the place. It was also my sister's first visit to our home and I was especially thrilled that she liked it. Of course, that delight may have just been for our TV, considering that a TV junkie like herself had just spent a week in Bombay without one!

We ended up spending most of our time relaxing at home, save for a couple of shopping trips, and the only sights seen were the mass of shops and humanity on Brigade Road. My sister discovered the game of squash at our clubhouse, and in the process, discovered the pitiful state of her fitness! A more shocking revelation was my dad's state of fitness: far, far superior than any of us had given him credit for, as he proceeded to run sis ragged almost every morning of their stay!

The highlight of the visit, and indeed, the reason for it, was (ahem!) our first anniversary. Yup, last week, hubby & I completed one year of married life. It was a quiet celebration ..... well, except for the balloons bursting!

Hubby's bro and sis-in-law joined us in the evening and we had dinner at Ebony, one of our favourite restaurants, located on the 13th floor of a building on M.G. Road. We sat on the balcony, enjoying a fine meal with a finer view of Bangalore at night down below us. The ladies were all suitably cloaked and jacketed against the chill breeze, but the men? Well, the men were men, and so manfully insisted they weren't cold. Right!

A couple of days later, the folks headed back (sigh!) But this is the optimistic me, so I'm glad for whatever time we got together and already looking forward to the next visit :)

Sweet & Sour Sauce

2009-01-08T19:39:00.003+05:30

Over the past year, I have discovered that the passion for cooking that runs in the veins of most of my family, surprisingly flows in mine too. I find the whole process extremely enjoyable, especially when it involves dishes off the typical home-cooking menu.

I follow in the footsteps of my mother, who believes that once you get the hang of cooking, you should feel free to experiment. She's the type of cook who feels that rigidly sticking to recipes and measurements takes all the fun out of cooking. Of course, if you're not careful, what should've been delicious can easily turn disastrous (as we've both found out!)

But nonetheless, experimenting with food is still real fun, and what I like best are dishes that are simple, scrumptious and can be tweaked to suit individual tastes. I had posted one such recipe earlier, and here's another one:

Sweet & Sour Sauce
Inspired by Kylie Kwong.

Ingredients:
1/2 inch piece of ginger
3-4 cloves of garlic
1 piece of jaggery (or a tablespoon of brown sugar, white will also do)
1 chilli - deseeded if you don't want it too hot (red chillies are better visually)
2 tbsp chopped spring onions (regular ones could work too)
1 tbsp chopped coriander
1 tbsp soy sauces (either dark or light or ideally a mix of both: dark for colour & light for flavour) 1 tbsp vinegar (I use apple cider vinegar)
Juice of 1 lemon
1 tbsp oil (olive, peanut or sesame preferably)
Dash of any other related sauces that you may have at home: eg - fish sauce, oyster sauce, Worcestershire sauce.
Stock (veg or non-veg) to increase quantity.
(I don't use salt because the soy and other sauces are salty enough; however this depends on your taste)

Method:
1. Mince the ginger, garlic, chilli and jaggery finely.
2. Mix all the ingredients together, except the oil.
3. Heat the oil separately and when hot (smoking hot according to Kylie Kwong, but not really necessary), pour over the sauce ..... it'll sizzle and crackle deliciously!

You can serve this sauce with steamed white meat or fish (chicken in the picture), or with momos or with pretty much anything you fancy. For a vegetarian version, simply omit the fish and oyster sauces.

What I love about this sauce is that you can't really go wrong making it. Just keep tasting as you go along till you get it the way you like. Also, these measurements aren't written in stone; you can easily add more or less of the ingredients according to your taste. You don't even need every one of them: the essentials are jaggery for the sweetness and soy for the saltiness, and ginger and garlic. The rest of what goes in is limited only by your imagination!

New Year, New Attitude

2009-01-01T16:10:00.001+05:30

At the Christmas Mass I attended this year, or rather, last year, the sermon was delivered by a visiting priest from Indonesia. He introduced himself, very humbly, as a "baby priest" and wanted to give a sermon that was "short, but meaningful".

He began with a story from his village back home, where many people raised cows for a living. During summers, the grazing grass would turn unappetizingly dry and seeing this, the cows wouldn't feed. The people therefore developed an amusingly ingenious solution: they made green spectacles and placed them over the cows' eyes! The cows' world, especially the grass, then seemed invitingly green and fresh, and they would continue to feed as usual. The reality, the priest said, was dry grass, but with the green spectacles, the people (and the cows!) found a way to deal with it.

The priest then said that compared to his past visits to India, he'd observed something different this time: that the people seemed to be less enthusiastic about Christmas, that the spirit of the festival was somewhat subdued here. He agreed that it was only natural, given the attacks against Christians in many parts of the country, and the terrorist strike in Bombay. But Christmas, he said, is at its heart, a festival of hope and joy, that God loved the world so much that He sent His Son to live as a human.

The priest concluded by saying that we should not get so overwhelmed by the negativity in our world that we completely forget the positives; the reality of our world undeniably has a lot that's wrong, but by putting on 'spectacles' of optimism and hope, we can find a way to deal with the problems our societies face.

For me, this was a very fitting and much-needed Christmas message, something that I want to take along into the new year too. With all that goes on around us, I think its easy to become depressed and/or cynical ...... but that's NOT how I want to live. I want to be optimistic, I want to feel hopeful and joyful.

I don't mean that I'll be skipping along merrily, believing problems will just disappear on their own, but in the sense that I won't let those problems keep me down and keep me from doing my duty. I won't forget that though there is a lot that's regrettable in our world, there is a lot to be thankful for as well .......

...... (and now, very strangely, the songs running through my head are a mix of Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive and Chumbawamba's Tubthumping!!!) Must be the lack of sleep ...... we brought in the new year the way I like it best - attended Mass and then had a not-so-quiet dinner with family.

Here's wishing you all a TERRIFIC NEW YEAR - Keep the optimism, keep the faith!

Christmas Wishes!!!

2008-12-24T20:51:00.002+05:30

So I'm sitting here right now with a slight backache, but I don't care coz I got it in a great way ...... we've been desperately decking up my in-laws place!!! I'm just thrilled I got to decorate more than one house this year.

And I'm absolutely over-the-moon THRILLED about my hair!!!! My sometimes-curly, sometimes-wavy, always-frizzy mane has been ironed into submission and is now swinging straight and shiny!!!

(I know its only going to last till the next wash, but oh, its such a treat for me!!!!)

That's all the time I have for this post ..... so here's wishing everyone who reads this a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

The Tricky Picture Tag

2008-12-17T12:36:00.003+05:30

I've been tagged by A (thank you!!!) Its another Q & A style tag, but with a photographic twist!!! The rule is that for every answer you have to do a Google image search and pick a picture on the first page with minimal explanation.

I'd seen this on a few blogs and it seemed quite tricky. It is, but its also a lot of fun to see what images turn up and these are what I got:

1. The age you will be on your next birthday: a quarter of a century!

2. A place you’d like to travel to: (so many, where do I begin???) Top destinations though: Italy and Ireland.

3. Your Favorite place: where the heart is!!!

4. Your favorite food/drink: CHOCOLATE all the way!!!

5. Your favorite pet: No pets allowed!!! (Don't mind them in the zoos or in the wild, but definitely no animals at home)

6. Your favorite color combination: Red and gold ...... like a red moonrise :)

7. Your favorite piece of clothing: Hardly wear them, but I love saris.

8. Your all time favorite song: (again, so many, where do I begin???) Everything I do I do it for you - Bryan Adams.

9. Your favorite TV show: Comedy - Friends; Drama - Lost.

10. Full name of your significant other: My beloved recluse would throttle me if I revealed this!

(Oh my God!!! I know the rules said 'minimal explanation', but how freaky is this???? Viggo Mortensen in the classic LOTR avatar was right there on the first page of results!!!! I think maybe it was the word 'recluse' that did it.......his character is mostly a loner initially. Damn, now I'm just dying to watch all three movies again, but the DVDs are with my sister :( )

11. The town in which you live in: Namma Bengaluru.

12. Your screen name/nickname: Shalom :)

13. Your first job: PR executive.

14. Your Dream Job: an artist - clicking photographs, painting and selling fabrics / glass / wood etc and maker of miscellaneous knick-knacks.

15: Bad Habit you have: Procrastination.

16. Your worst fear: Falling down stairs!!!

17. The one thing you’ll like to do before you die: See as much of this beautiful world as possible.

18. The first thing you’ll buy if you get $1,000,000: A world tour for the family!!!

Ok, so that's me done! I am now going to complicate life for Amrita and Smriti :D

Hope to see this one up soon (well, reasonably soon!!! :P)

Back in the Saddle!

2008-12-15T12:50:00.000+05:30

What an incredibly busy weekend its been! But in the happiest way possible!!!

I had been looking forward so eagerly to this Christmas, but recent events had considerably crushed that Christmas spirit and try as I might, I just couldn't make myself feel that bubbly joy I usually carry around this time of year.

But once I was past that initial gloom, I realised again how special this Christmas is: its our first together, in our first home. And then I was determined to do my best to make it a good one.

First, we (or rather I!) wrote out our Christmas cards. I have always loved the whole process of buying/making cards, bringing out the glittering ink pens to write out people's names and even sticking stamps on the envelopes! Although if I'd mentioned that last part to hubby, I'm sure he'd have insisted I go to the post office too!

Second, we put up our tree and started decorating it, carols playing in the background (with the occassional rock song in between ...... hubby was the DJ after all :-D). I happily started hanging up ornaments and draping ropes of bells and tinsel all around, and then hubby came in with the lights. Lessons learnt: always, always put the lights in first!

I wanted some of the lights placed inside, closer to the trunk, and those wires got tangled with the tinsel and blocked the ornaments till we had one twisted mess, so ultimately we had to take everything off and start all over again. But even when it was done, I couldn't help going back and adjusting some of the ornaments, redraping the tinsel, and the image in my head, strangely, is that of the mother of a bride - fussing away till the beloved daughter looks just so!!!

Then we moved on to our wreath and some other little bits and bobs. Hubby wanted to get a hook from which to hang our wreath because its a bit heavy, but I felt that just tape would do, and after much, umm, discussing and debating, we went with my solution.

Somehow, over the past few months, we've ended up with a selection of tapes that would rival that of any stationery store: so we have double-sided tape, clear double-sided tape, heavy duty mounting double sided tape, duct tape and the regular old Scotch cellotape. Using a complex combination of these, hubby at last got our wreath fixed firm (I hope!)

We finished up with the rest of the stuff that needed to be stuck, and then, in the middle of the mess that was our living room, we stood arm in arm, grinning ear to ear, surveying our handiwork, finally feeling Christmassy!!!

Now carrying that optimism on to Phase 2. In case you wondered what the title of this post means, well, I'm absolutely determined to make some sweets for Christmas and I plan to start the first one - coconut burfi - today. This time around, I will make sure I have a lot of time, I will measure my ingredients correctly (and then stick to them!), and I will definitely, totally follow the instructions to the letter ....... (deep, calming breaths) ......

Reminiscing.....

2008-12-10T18:00:00.003+05:30

Close to a couple of years ago (can't believe its been that long!!!), I was up on the online matrimonial mart. I alternated between anger and amusement at the proposals that were coming in, and I so desperately needed to vent that I even started up a separate blog for the purpose (taken offline now as its no longer relevant :))

A few days after my first post, I received a comment from a stranger ...... well, not a complete stranger, as I later found out. Preethi arrived at my blog through our mutual friend Thought Warp (who is incidentally the person who persuaded me to start blogging, by the way). Preethi gave me some very sound advice (thanks again!!!), and naturally I then went on to check out her blog and eventually became a regular reader.

While scrolling through her comments form after one fine post, a comment by another blogger caught my eye, and so I went to check out her blog. I instantly felt a connection with Reflections because she's a Potter-maniac like me (the first post I read over there was about the incredibly brilliant JK Rowling). And like most people, after a few of her posts, I couldn't help but become a regular reader there too.

Through Reflections, I found Renu and ISH. Renu's blog is a very comforting place for me ...... something about the way she writes reminds me of my mother and home. And about ISH, man, I wish I could write with as much spunk and punch as she does!!!

I was curious about another blogger whose comments I'd seen on these three ladies' blogs. The name Deeplydip intrigued me, and when I checked out her blogs I again liked what I saw. Styalogue is such a cool platform for sharing thoughts on fashion!!! It feels great to read and share thoughts on style, and it reminds me of all the fun times with my gal pals :D

Another fashionista I really admire is Agnes. This lady is all about effortless style, and so much more. The work she and her husband do is truly worth commending, so all the very best to you guys!!!

You might ask, what brought on this wave of flashbacks?

Well, yesterday a new friend - A - sent me some sunshine with The Proximidade Scroll Award. It meant a lot, considering what the award is for:

This award is given to a blog that invests and believes in PROXIMITY – nearness in space, time and relationships! These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers!

Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award

I have always loved writing. Even as a schoolkid, writing never fazed me the way it did a lot of my classmates. Because I loved reading too, writing seemed to me to be a wonderful way of self-expression. So you would think that when the blogging phenomenon took off, I'd have immediately joined in. I didn't.

Because somewhere over the years, I started struggling with the words. I had to do a lot of writing for my studies; project reports and things like that were easy. And so Thought Warp was after me for a long time to start a blog, but somehow I just couldn't find the words, the ideas needed to do so.

Even when I did start this blog, I struggled for a long time to get into the writing zone. Initially there was a lack of time (along with a lack of ability!) So I basically just read a lot of blogs, rather than posting anything in my own.

But somewhere along the line, the more I ventured out into the blogosphere, the more I read each of your blogs, the easier it became to write. Each of you has inspired and motivated me with your words, and now writing has become fun again!!!

Most importantly, I have come to know some terrific people I now consider friends, so in this spirit of friendship, I give all of you this award (I know some of you have already received it, and A, you gave it to me, but so what??? You all deserve it!!!)

Agnes

Deeplydip

ISH

Preethi

Reflections

Renu

Thought Warp

(Whew!!! After all this writing, I just don't have the energy to link up all over again!!!)

Awarded Again!!!

2008-12-06T16:50:00.002+05:30

On the blog front, last week was really special, as I got not one, not two, but three awards!!! And what made it more special was that they were from people who are totally rocking bloggers themselves - Reflections, Deeplydip and Agnes :)

Reflections and Deeplydip both gave me this Butterfly Award.

Reflections gave this to me for my photoblog, and I will very proudly display it there as well, but I'm going to pass it forward from here itself. So I now give this award to some of the coolest blogs/bloggers I know:

----------------------------------------

Agnes gave me this award, but I didn't know what it was for, so I Googled it and its about "acknowledging the values that every blogger shows in his/her effort to transmit cultural, ethical, literary and personal values every day." Wow!!! Thanks again, Agnes :)

This now goes ahead to:

Deeplydip
Goofy Mumma
My Space
Reflections
Renu
Thought Warp

The rules for all these awards are pretty simple: put them up on your blogs (giving yourself a pat on the back!), link back to the person who gave it to you and spread the cheer to deserving blogs!!!

Wishful Thinking

2008-12-05T19:50:00.001+05:30

Yesterday, one of the news channels ran a story on the kind of gizmos the 26/11 terrorists were carrying, and also on how intensively and extensively they were trained. As I saw the story, I was once again amazed by the tremendous wealth such organizations possessed, and even more amazed by the brains and the management behind such acts of terror.

And then I wondered, wished ......

What if the people who masterminded these acts of destruction put their considerable talent and resources to constructive use? If they invested all those millions wasted in weaponry, into schools and colleges, into creating jobs - honest, legal jobs - so that their youth could have a chance at a decent life, instead of being filled with hate and going down paths that lead only to death?

When I think about it this way, of all the good that could've been done with that much money, that much ability, the sense of loss is staggering!!!

How can these people be so blind, so stupid??? And then to keep saying that they're doing all this for their God ........ what an insult it is to God!!!

Here's a thought: instead of executing innocent people, how about lending a helping hand in whatever way possible? Instead of dying for God, how about living for God???

The Need of the Hour: Responsible Leadership

2008-12-02T16:22:00.003+05:30

There used to be this ad on tv a few months ago, I forget for what product. The political drama in the wake of the Bombay siege brought it to mind:

It had this typical Indian politician relaxing on the lawn of his bungalow, surrounded by sycophantic aides and giving an interview to a bunch of reporters about contesting an upcoming election, when a young man comes up to him and starts shooting questions about his qualifications - his education, previous work experience and so on.

The politician is surprised by this line of questioning, wondering how it matters for someone contesting an election, and asks why the youth wants to know all this.

The youth replies that its only natural to ask these questions of anyone applying for a job.

The politician is taken aback: job? What job???

To which the youth calmly states: the job of running this country.

The politician is left stunned.

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Running any country is a job, a monumental job that requires consistent and coordinated efforts at multiple levels. And because it entails the security and welfare of citizens, on which no price can be put, these jobs come with an enormous amount of power and responsibility.

As a management student, one of the earliest lessons we learnt was that authority and responsibility must go hand in hand. If you are entrusted with authority and power over something, you are also responsible to see that the work is carried out.

But in Indian politics, "responsibility" is a dirty word. Our politicians want to win elections, win power, and once that's done, the rest of their term is basically spent in calculating how to hold on to that power for the maximum possible time. But very few accept the responsibility that comes with the power.

Post the attacks, Maharashtra Chief Minister Vilasrao Deshmukh tells the media "If any responsibility falls on me, I have offered to resign." IF any responsibility falls on you???? You're "Chief Minister" of a state that has suffered the country's most brutal terrorist attack and you still have to wonder if any responsibility falls on you???

Deshmukh's on his way out, and good riddance!!! The lobbying to be his successor has been going on for a while and a new Chief should be named any moment now.

But it really doesn't matter who the new person is, all that will count is what he does with his power. Will he use it responsibly, promptly and unswervingly to get answers? To crack down harshly on the forces of terror? To put measures into place that ensure we're never this vulnerable again?

We are a nation that abounds with politicians, but is starved of leaders. And that really is the need in these extraordinary times, not destructive politics where people's actions are constantly geared towards maintaining power, but constructive leadership at all levels of government, where people put aside egos and personal ambition to work, actually work, for the betterment of the nation.

26-27/11

2008-11-27T16:32:00.002+05:30

Repeatedly. Relentlessly. Ruthlessly.
That's how they work. That's how they attack.
For what?
Money? Power? Revenge? Religion?
No excuse justifies this kind of coldbloodedness.
I feel wrung-out, and I'm only watching it on tv.
What of those right in the middle of this nightmare?
What of their frantic loved ones?
What of those bravehearts risking everything to end this?
Nearly 20 hours now ....... how much longer?
Life will limp back to normalcy.
But how 'normal' will it really be?
We think we live in a free country,
but as long as terror goes unpunished,
we all remain hostages to that bit of fear.
May there be justice at the end of this madness.

Life Aborted

2008-11-26T13:45:00.001+05:30

You know how you see / hear / read certain things and they kind of linger in your mind for a while? Give off vibes and feelings that you can't shake off? Sometimes make an impact so deep that you know you'll never forget them?

Fellow blogger My Space's powerfully written, powerfully moving short story is one of those reads giving me a feeling that I haven't been able to shake off, especially since it relates to one of those things that I cannot forget.

I was in the ninth standard, close to 14 years old, when one day the entire batch of us were taken to our school auditorium. It was for yet another "awareness" talk, where a group of doctors and other trained professionals lectured us on menstruation, sex, pregnancy and other issues girls on the verge of womanhood needed to know.

We entered the auditorium and took our seats, chattering away merrily like most young girls. Our headmistress introduced the main speaker of the day, a middle-aged male doctor. All I remember of him today is that he was tall and wore glasses. He said that the session would consist of him giving a talk, us watching a short film, followed by some q & a time and the subject of the day was abortion.

He got started on the talk, and for the most part, we were quiet, although softly whispered conversations and gossip, hushed jokes and giggles, passing of notes and comments continued throughout the audience.

Then he played the film. And we all slowly shut up ...... stunned into silence. A few minutes in and some of the girls closed their eyes or put their heads down, simply unable to take any more. I watched, and kept watching even as tears burned my throat and I felt as if something were shredding my stomach to pieces.

Time has erased many of the details of the film and of the rest of the session, but what imprinted itself in my mind were the images: little bodies that had human form but no features, twitching in agony, and the most horrific of them all ...... the tiny foetus that couldn't have been bigger than my palm, lying bloodied, battered and broken.

I don't write this to gross anyone out; this is what I saw, what has stayed with me ever since and what flashes through my mind every time I see / hear / read the word 'abortion'. For me, those images reduce the whole debate on the subject to just one thing: abortion is murder.

For those who've simply been careless, or for whom a pregnancy at the time is "not convenient", or for whom, as in My Space's story, having a son is most important - you commit the cruelest sort of murder because the life you decide to take is life at its purest, most innocent and most helpless stage.

And yet, the matter isn't black and white when you consider cases where the health of the mother and/or baby is at risk, or in the worst possible scenario - where a rape victim gets pregnant. It is an unimaginably traumatic choice to make, but a choice that nevertheless must be made.

How do you decide what is right in such situations? As strongly as I feel on the subject, I have no answer here.

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P.S.: November 2nd is celebrated as All Souls' Day. The Catholic Church observes a special Mass on this day to remember and pray for the souls of all the departed that they might rest in peace. On this All Souls' Day mass, the priest also prayed for the souls of aborted children. It never occurred to me to do so before, but its not something I'll forget now.

Be My Guest!

2008-11-21T19:50:00.002+05:30

I have always loved having people around; not strangers or new acquaintances, but familiar, friendly faces. Coming from a big, but far-flung family, some of my happiest memories are of when aunts and uncles would come back home for a visit.

I used to feel immensely thrilled at the prospect of getting together like in old times with everybody under one roof - either at my home or at my grandparents'. It didn't matter that there were more people than there was room - we would all adjust so that everybody could be conveniently accomodated in the limited space.

Then there was one of the best parts: the food!!! We are totally and completely a food-loving family, so over and above the sustenance aspect, food is a vital part of all our lives. My mother being a fantastic cook, great food on the table was a daily occurrence in our house ...... and it only got better when we had guests.

Whether the guests were over just for a meal, or were staying with us for a few days, the "Athithi Devo Bhava" (Sanskrit for "a guest is God") mindset that is the foundation of Indian hospitality, was all-important, with the result that people loved visiting our home, and I loved it even more when they did. The atmosphere would be warm & inviting, the food delicious and plentiful, and my parents - ever the gracious hosts.

Today, I am a homemaker myself. I only felt confident about having guests over 3-4 months into my marriage. Since then, we've had friends and family over for meals quite a few times, though in small groups. We've also had houseguests on three occassions: the first visitors being my mother and my grandmother, followed by my father-in-law and nephew a month later, and finally, my mother-in-law (MIL), who was with us last week.

As a child, I only saw the fun part of having guests, but the older I grew, the more I began to realise how much careful thought and planning went into ensuring that fun. However its only now, having actually been a hostess, that I can truly appreciate just how hard my parents worked to provide that unfailing hospitality time and again.

There were always hands to help: we had maids to handle the cleaning up, we kids would do whatever we were told, and Dad would be right beside Mom, slogging it out to get the food ready.

Dad was and is her right hand, but it was Mom who really was the brains of the whole show. Even in our daily life, it was her foresight and strategies that had our home running smoothly. Earlier, I wrote about our daily food as though it were matter of fact that it would be great. But what I didn't note was the great pains that Mom took to bring out that food, day in and day out, taking into account everyone's tastes and preferences.

And now when I try to do the same for hubby & me & our guests, I am repeatedly amazed by her love for us, her selflessness and her unswerving commitment to her family.

Mom always believed that you could handle anything if you kept things organized and planned things in advance, and it is only now that I really understand the importance of this. Because you may have help, like I did last week with sis-in-law and her sis also coming over to spend time with our MIL, but ultimately its my kitchen, my space, my setup. I need to be the master planner, I need to know what has to be done when and I need to do it all while making everyone feel comfortable and welcome, not only because that's how I was raised, but also because that's how I was received in their homes.

Honestly, I was anxious about how MIL's visit would go, but more than the anxiety was the desire to make her stay as enjoyable as possible, because despite the added work, I do love having people around.

And that I think is the necessary factor underlying great hospitality: the love for hosting guests, along with a spirit of service and the invaluable, combined effort of all the family. Its what creates that almost-tangible sense of warmth and welcome, what makes the difference between homes that you visit because you want to, and those you visit because you have to.

The Making and Breaking of Besan Ka Laddoo

2008-11-07T16:45:00.002+05:30

After my last post, some of you had asked about the besan ka laddoo. Well, I gave it a shot last week, feeling very festive with the twinkling lights and sparkling fireworks outside the window. I was quite confident, as the recipe seemed to be very simple: the one I was following said to take 4 cups besan to 1 cup each of ghee and powdered sugar; roast the besan in the ghee till it gives off an aroma, take it off the heat, cool & then mix in the sugar and some powdered cardamom (sliced almonds too if you want them), shape them into balls and voila! Besan laddoos are ready to serve.

It seems as if it should've been a piece of cake, but compared to what happened, cakes are much, much easier! If I were to describe step-by-stupid-step what I did and why I did it, this would be a reaallllly long post. So here's the concise version of the idiot's guide to besan ka laddoo.

It begins with my shock as what seemed to be a lil amount of ghee in the measuring cup suddenly looked like a mini-lake in the pan. I took out a couple of teaspoonfuls, considering we'd already had a lot of rich sweets earlier that week. Needless to say, the mix turned out to be too dry to shape into balls. I wanted to kick myself for that sudden attack of health-consciousitis. (Note to self: if you really want to eat "healthy", don't bother making sweets!)

Anyway, I thought I could still salvage it, something a quick call to mom confirmed - all I had to do was add more ghee. Now you would think since I had taken out only two teaspoonfuls, I would've replaced just that amount. But no, this is the idiot's guide, remember? I picked up the ghee bottle, yeah the whole bottle, and happily went glop, glop, glop ...... and some more glop, glop, glop all over the pan!

So now ....... yeah, you guessed it, the mixture was too wet!!! Usually quite a few types of dough tend to harden as they cool and I fervently hoped that this would too. So as it cooled, I tried forming a ball ....... it didn't exactly stay in a perfect round, but to my relief, at least it didn't break apart like in the first time.

Feeling better, I dropped the misshapen laddoo onto a waiting thali and started work on the next one ....... after which I stopped. This is why:

I had succeeded in making besan ka blobs!!! I stared in sheer disbelief for a few seconds, before my sense of humour caught up with me. I called out to hubby, who came inquiring if the laddoos were ready ...... and burst out laughing when he saw the plate!!!

Well, ultimately I just spread the whole mix onto the thali and even scored criss-cross lines over it, in a final hope that just maybe we could at least have besan burfi. But no, the moment I tried to lift a piece out, it would break apart! The end result was that we had to eat the umm, laddoos / burfi / powder with a spoon! But hey, it tasted exactly right, exactly like its supposed to. Hopefully, next time I'll get the look right too!!! :)

If you're planning to try this out, don't be put off by my experience, because in hindsight, its really not so bad. Just remember to get your measurements right; I don't think the ratios I used were correct, so if you'd like, check out this recipe here (I made pedas using their recipe and that turned out superb!) Also, roast the besan on very low heat (it must cook, but not brown) and oh yes, make sure your sugar is powdered really fine - did I forget to mention the intact sugar crystals in my mixture???

And a last all-important piece of advice: before attempting this recipe, talk it over with someone who's actually made besan ka laddoo - successfully!!!

Lighting Up for Diwali

2008-10-26T21:35:00.007+05:30

Yesterday night while coming back home, I was craning my neck out the window to see if I could spot any lights up for Diwali. I could, but only in the zillion-and-one stores we passed along the way, and those don't count, because businesses commercialize everything and create festivals even when there are none.

Closer to home, we passed some of our neighbouring residential buildings, but only one apartment had lights on in their balcony. I was more hopeful as we turned in towards our lane, but to my shock and disappointment, not a single flat had anything special going on.

I think one of the greatest things about India is how we go all out to celebrate our festivals, and after two years away from this festive cheer, I was really looking forward to Diwali because Ganesh Chaturthi and Navratri were pretty low-key here (at least where we stay), as compared to the atmosphere in Bombay. Even though none of these has a religious significance for me, it is nevertheless great fun to celebrate and I always have this warm feeling inside whenever any festival comes around, regardless of religion.

Anyway, earlier this night as we were coming back home, I still looked around, and one or two more places had lights on. At least that was something, I thought. But then we saw our building, and hubs and me both shouted out happily. There were our neighbours' balconies, all dripping with colourful lights!!! In front of the gate, children stood with sparklers and in the distance, we could hear the first of the firecrackers start to go off.

Its now a couple of hours later, and the firecrackers are going strong. My festive spirit has now received a rejuvenating boost and I'm all set to celebrate too! Out will come my candles and tealights! I'm also planning to attempt besan ka laddoo, one of my favourite sweets, which, back in the old days, a friend of my grandmother's used to make and send for me. Wish me luck on that front, and wish all who read this a Very Happy and bright Diwali :)

To Booze or Not To Booze

2008-10-23T18:30:00.000+05:30

Yesterday's B'lore Times led with an article on Health Minister Anbumani Ramadoss's current focus - total nation-wide prohibition. The Minister's concern is driven by the increasing number of youth getting addicted to alcohol. I agree that this is becoming a serious problem, but I don't feel that a complete ban on alcohol is the solution.

I grew up in a family where nearly everybody consumed alcohol. Now I don't mean that the elders were constantly talli, but whenever we had get-togethers with family or friends, the booze flowed freely and all adults were welcome to it. Even us children could take a sip from our parents' glasses whenever curiosity got the better of us. And after I turned 18, I was always offered a drink too at our family parties.

There was never any taboo attached to alcohol in our family. Adults were free to drink, but only free to drink as adults. That meant knowing your capacity, and always, always staying within the bounds of decent behaviour. As long as we behaved responsibly, there was no reason not to enjoy and appreciate fine liquor.

But during college and ever since, I've realised that the real reason why many people drink is not to appreciate good liquor, but more to "fit in" and appear "cool". And the more you drink, the "cooler" you're thought to be. I remember girl friends from very conservative families, staying overnight at whichever girl's house was empty on the pretext of group study, while actually it was a booze party. The following day they used to brag about it very excitedly; it didn't matter what they had been drinking, as long as they could boast about drinking.

Today, with binge drinking becoming the latest trend, the situation is even worse. I've seen photos of girls in UK and the US sprawled unconscious in bars and pubs after bingeing. I don't know if its the same in India, but even if it isn't, we've got a far worse trend of people drinking, driving and running others over. While I enjoy the occassional drink, I really don't know what the appeal is in boozing to the extent that you're either just a useless lump, or a total menace to society.

I don't think that drinking in itself is bad, its irresponsible, excessive drinking that's the problem. The point is that anything, consumed excessively is bad for you. Even basic stuff like sugar, salt or oil can be potentially deadly if you have too much of it.

Banning alcohol completely is not going to resolve the issue. All this would do is give the black market a good boost, and further increase the hype around alcohol, making it a bigger deal than it really is.

If you truly wanted to make a difference, the thing to do would be to tackle mindsets about alcohol. Easier said than done, believe me, I know. But ultimately, having proper attitudes is the only thing that helps you make the right choices so that you can have your fun without being a nuisance to anyone else.

Angela's Ashes

2008-10-17T17:30:00.001+05:30

I recently read a book called Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt. Its the author's memoirs of his childhood, and I picked it up because a friend had listed it as her favourite book and also because it had won a Pulitzer.

I was visiting my parents at the time, and had plenty of time to relax and read, so in this situation, it would've usually taken me 2-3 days to finish a book this size, 4 days at the max. I started reading one night after dinner, finished chapter 1 and then picked it up again only a few days later. I finally completed it only about 3 weeks later.

Why? Because the author recollects a childhood so unbelievably miserable, there was just no way I could spend too long with the book at one stretch. Definitely I could not bear the thought of reading it after I had enjoyed my mom's wonderful meals, not when he described the carelessness of his alcoholic father and embittered mother, his and his brothers' painful hunger, the many, many years they spent surviving only on bread and tea, and many more instances of desperate poverty.

His earliest memories are from when he was four, around the time of the Great Depression in America, and they were forced to move back to their native Ireland from the US because of their poverty. That's where things go from bad to worse and even more worse.

Though they have family nearby, they're forced to survive on dole money from the government, most of which the father drinks away. They live in a hellish house, with the street's only toilet right next to their door. The lack of proper clothes, nutrition and Ireland's bitter cold see to it that the author loses two younger siblings before he is five, another baby having already died back in the States. And the problems and tragedies just keep piling on.

But despite such a horrific childhood, the book is not written in a way to gain sympathy. Its just a straightforward narrative that's surprisingly funny at times, penned in such a way that you could almost hear someone narrating it in that typical Irish accent. And I think that, because its tone is never plainitive, or sad or bitter, but just matter-of-fact, is exactly what makes this book so hard-hitting.

We know that children, inspite of their innocence, are sometimes very insightful and see things much more clearly than adults do, and the author was no different. The book reflects that mix of innocence and insight in a way that just tugs on every emotional string.

All through their childhood, whenever their father returned home late at night, drunk, he would wake up the author and his brother and make them sing Irish patriotic songs and promise they would die for the country if the need arose. In school, their Catholic teachers made them promise to die for the faith if the need arose. Father wants them to die for the country, teachers want them to die for the faith, and the child McCourt wonders ..... doesn't anyone want them to live?

There were so many more such instances in the book that make you stop and think. One other thing that especially struck a chord with me was when the children have to live with their maternal aunt because the father takes off and the mother is hospitalized. The aunt is by no means rich, but is definitely better off than the author's family, yet still is a very angry and bitter woman (presumably because she is childless). She takes out all that anger on these children, and young McCourt again wonders, she has enough money for food, electricity in her house, her very own toilet ...... yet, why is she so angry?

This made me sit up and really count my blessings. Many people must be doing it, I'm sure, yet I don't think we remember to be grateful for things like having electricity, or food, or our own bathrooms, or even health, the fact that we have all our senses in working order, as blessings. We are so used to them, we tend to take them all for granted, and that's why I'm glad I picked this book up.

Reading it was certainly not easy, but it's worth it because it makes you realise how much you really have been blessed with, increases your level of awareness towards the poor and reinforces that we have a moral duty to help, whether it is by giving your time, effort or money.

Edit: would like to add running water to my list of taken-for-granted blessings ...... we didn't have water for a few hours yesterday, and it was hell.

The Addiction Tag

2008-10-07T22:30:00.000+05:30

Tagged again by Reflections, to post five of my addictions and here they are:

1. CHOCOLATE - my first true love!!!

2. Books - I am a voracious reader and I feel like something's missing if there are no books in the house waiting to be read. In my school days, I was a member of three libraries and during vacations, I would have at least four books at the same time - a Nancy Drew / Hardy Boys, an Enid Blyton school story, an Agatha Christie and an Archie comic - so I could pick & choose depending on my mood. Same goes now as well: I'm in the middle of a Christine Feehan goth romance & Yann Martel's Life of Pi - the latter has been on hold for a while coz it got a bit disturbing.

3. Music - I love listening to music, its how I unwind. I need a few minutes of not-so-quiet time every day - just me & the music & my thoughts, although this need was more pressing earlier when I was studying & working.

4. Games - no, no, I'm not the athletic type at all..... except for badminton & table tennis :) What I mean is, I have phases where I get hooked on to board games, card games, computer games etc. Spider Solitaire has caught my interest again and I'm desperately trying to crack the 'difficult' level. Also, last month my nephew re-introduced rummy to all of us and we had a blast!!! I am just dying to play again, and am irritating hubby constantly :D ....... would help if we got a pack of cards first though :D

5. Tea - this is the only, I suppose, serious addiction I have: I need my morning & evening cup of tea. Without it, I actually suffer headaches. Earlier, I thought I needed a mid-morning cup of coffee too, but now I have days when I can comfortably go without it, so yay..... although frankly, its not such a hardship to skip it considering the rubbish I make in the name of coffee! But it is definitely a must-have on weekends ...... why??? Because hubby makes coffee then, and it is a-ma-zing!!!

The rest of the instructions for this tag ..........The persons who have been tagged have to link the blogger who tagged them and also extend the tag to five or more bloggers and link them too.

So I pass this on to: Agnes, Diligent Candy, Preethi, Swats and Thought Warp.

Exploring Karnataka: From Palace to Pak!

2008-10-01T09:30:00.006+05:30

On entering Mysore, we were struck by the clean streets, tidy houses and well-kept gardens. Further in, we drove past the imposing St. Philomena's Church, which is built along the unmistakable lines of the Cologne Cathedral.

After a quick lunch at Hotel Ramanashree, we moved on towards Mysore Palace. This was the first time I was seeing any kind of Indian palace, and I was quite unprepared for the sheer beauty of it.

You step in through the gates and there's the palace stretching out on the left, with an intricately carved temple on the right, just as you enter. We snapped off a good many pictures outside because cameras aren't allowed inside and rightly so, as the continual flashes from a steady stream of tourists would surely cause the paint to fade.

But still, that didn't stop me from wishing that I could've taken some photos, because the interiors were just that gorgeous. A plaque outside had stated that the palace was designed in the Indo-Saracenic style, which means that it combines British and Mughal design elements. Floors, walls, ceilings, doors are all exquisite, intricately crafted works of art. The overall colours inside were vibrant reds, greens and blues with gilded borders that somehow work wonderfully together to create this richly vibrant look. All the doors were masterpieces in wood, and in some of the rooms, so were the ceilings!!!

We saw the throne room with its famous golden throne which is only displayed to the public during the Dasara festival period - pretty lucky timing for us! This was also the first time I saw a machine gun. Not that machine guns were used in the palace's heydays ...... they belonged to the many security officers present in this particular room :)

The main door leading to this throne room is this jaw-dropping, absolutely stunningly carved creation, made of what we believe is silver, or definitely some metal because it has that silverish, pinkish tarnished look. I would've loved to run my fingers over it, but unfortunately you only see it as you go down a staircase.

Then we entered what I suppose is a viewing gallery which looks out onto the big courtyard, where preparations were on for Dasara. The ceiling is in sections here. Each section is lavishly painted with depictions of various gods and scenery, set against what appears to be the sky, all of which is surrounded by a huge painted frame.

And here's where I noticed something surprising. Nearly all the frames had what were unmistakably angels outside and in several depictions, Hindu gods were shown as having angel-like wings! On second thought, it made perfect sense because this palace was designed by an English architect. Leaving the palace then I was struck by what a beautiful testimony to intercultural art and architecture this palace is.

By then it was already around 5 p.m. and we desperately needed a caffeine fix. We also had one quick stop to make before moving on: I mean, what is the point of going to Mysore if you don't buy Mysore pak???

So off we went in search of coffee and sweets, looking for Cafe Coffee Day for the former, and a shop called Bombay Tiffany's for the latter. Fortunately, both turned out to be on Devaraj Urs Road which must be the fashion street of Mysore - all the big brand outlets were there! After tasting various mithai, hubs & me settled on some almond barfi for him, my all-time favourite - peda - and of course, some totally sinful, melt-in-your-mouth-coz-its-loaded-with-ghee Mysore pak! Yayyyy!!!

Our original plan had been to visit Brindavan next, and so we were off again. Only we didn't realise how far the gardens were (19 kms fyi) from Mysore, and so by the time we reached it was already dark. We could've caught the musical fountain show but the crowd there was overwhelming, being a Sunday and nearing festival time. Plus there were too many unsavoury looking types there which made us all a bit uncomfortable given that they turn off all the lights for the fountain show.

The decision to leave was quick, and since it had been a pretty long day, we decided to head home. SIL and me were a bit sad as we had hoped to drive through Mysore and see the palace and the rest of the town all lit up. We also couldn't make it back to St. Philomena's Church. But as BIL pragmatically pointed out: leave something for the next trip!

Exploring Karnataka: Feathers & Scales

2008-10-01T09:30:00.002+05:30

Last Sunday, we set off on a day-long trip to see some of the sights near Bangalore. There were four of us: hubby & me, his bro & his wife (BIL and SIL for the rest of the post). On the agenda were the Ranganathittu Bird Sanctuary, Mysore Palace and Brindavan Gardens.

We'd decided to start at 7:30 a.m., so naturally, we only left at 8:15 :) We took the Kanakpura road out onto the Bangalore-Mysore highway, and planned to stop for breakfast at the much-hyped Kamath's. The place was packed as usual, though I don't know why, because the food doesn't live up to its reputation. It was all quite lacklustre and I found myself comparing it to the absolutely scrumptious fare I'd enjoyed at my local Adiyar Ananda Bhavan (A2B as its popularly known, and how I love that name!!!) Maybe its just that I prefer the Tamilian take on the dishes over the Kannadiga style ..... I am told that they are quite different and I will take hubby's word for it.

Anyway, after that filling but not satisfying breakfast, we proceeded on to Ranganathittu. I fell into a light doze and only snapped out of it when SIL made an offhand comment about how many crocodiles we would see.

"What???" I croaked. Crocodiles??? In a bird sanctuary?????

Childhood memories of Khoon Bhari Maang flooded my brain and I started having a silent, but potent, panic attack. What if something terrible happened? What if I lost a limb? What if I didn't make it back at all? I tried to pray, but images of Rekha being attacked by the croc still dominated.

Next to me, hubby calmly flipped through a guidebook and handed the part on the bird sanctuary to me. That's when I realised that Ranganathittu is a set of small islets on the Cauvery river and you have to go around in a boat (silent groans.......because I am not a boating fan) to see the birds. Whoever wrote the review apparently also flipped out after realising there were crocs, only to be reassured that the beasts are amply fed on fish from the Cauvery and so are uninterested in humans.

The worst of the panic subsided after I read this, though I still had serious qualms about what was coming up. But I didn't have any choice except to go ahead, and so ...... I did. One of the first things that reassured me on entering the sanctuary was the number of people there, all happily enjoying the place. I thought, hmmm ...... nothing seems to have happened to them, nothing will happen to me too.

From then on, I was my usual camera-crazed self ........ for a bit. We went up to this viewing platform with insanely steep steps. Climbing up was no problem, but looking at the steps from the top set off the panic again (yeah, I have issues with heights and with going down steps too :)) Basically, I have issues with a lot of things, but then I recalled this realisation I had a long time ago, even posted over here.

So I took a deep breath, told myself to focus and stop being a wimp and went down the damn steps. That same focus and hubby's firm hand got me on to the pokey little boat and then off we went. We were oohing and aahing over the many, many birds when hubs excitedly pointed out the first croc. And there it was, swimming just about ten feet away from us, not even looking at us. Seconds later, on the shore of the islet we were passing, a massive croc got up and turned its back on us. No baring of teeth, or snapping of scary jaws ....... just outright disinterest.

Well, that wasn't so bad, I thought. In fact, it had actually been pretty cool! Then on, I truly did enjoy myself. The birds were amazing, with the sweetest sight being the mommy birds feeding the little babies. Our boatman was quite the informative guide, who told us that these birds were the White Ibis, who'd come over from Nigeria, and that there were 50 crocodiles in the sanctuary (we barely saw five of them by the end, and I was actually disappointed :D).

We also saw cormorants, night herons, lapwings, wagtails ..... (or was it laptails & wagwings??? No, I'm sure I got it right the first time :)) On some of the taller trees, there were loads of what appeared like black leaves hanging from the higher branches. I looked at them curiously till hubby grinned and said they were bats! Thank heaven we were there in the middle of the day and nowhere around when those awful things woke up!!!

One of the best sights were the birds gracefully flying from islet to islet, swooping low over the water as they did so. SIL and me were frantically twisting left and right, trying to get those perfect shots of a bird with widespread wings that you see in magazines. Needless to say, we were unsuccessful. Wildlife photography requires the utmost patience and I stand in complete awe and respect of those people who patiently wait it out in the wild, to capture the animals in all their ...... animalness!

Our trip around the sanctuary was a scant half hour and it felt like we'd barely begun when we reached back. We walked along the banks of the river, trying to see if we could spot birds on the mainland, but didn't see any except the omnipresent crow! After some refreshing drinks from the small cafeteria, we then headed on towards Mysore ........ to be continued!

p.s.: In case you're wondering why there are no photos accompanying this post, well, that's because I'm seriously considering starting a photoblog (don't know why I never thought of it before). Hope to have it up by the end of this week.

Tag # 3: Q & A Time

2008-09-22T23:00:00.000+05:30

The tag game continues, many thanks to Renu :) An interesting bunch of questions to be answered, some to which the replies were instantaneous, others that required some thought.

RULE #1 - People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2 - Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people.

********

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?

I would be shattered, then murderously angry & would eventually cool down to indifference and therefore being single.

2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?

That all my family live close enough for us to meaningfully be a part of each other's lives.

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?

People who don't do anything positive, but will spend a lot of time and effort to screw things up for others.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

Invest the bulk of it for a steady stream of income that would let hubby & me: keep donating money to worthy charities; send my parents & parents-in-law to their dream destinations; buy homes in London, Florence, Bombay & Kerala; travel and see as much of God's gorgeous earth as possible .

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?

My best friends are hubby & my family and I obviously love them; have other close friends too who I love, but no, wouldn't be in love with them.

6. Which is more blessed: loving someone or being loved by someone?

I used to take it for granted that if there is a relationship between two people, any relationship - parent-child, or siblings, friends, spouses etc - love just automatically exists. But I have sadly learned this is not necessary: you may love, but it doesn't mean that you will get that love back, so definitely receiving love is the greater blessing, in fact, the greatest blessing.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you love?

Going beyond the man-woman love context to love in any relationship, I would wait as long as it takes.

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what will you do?

Wish them well and move on.

9. If you could root for one social cause, what would it be?

Taking basic education to the level of understanding and respecting differences in religions and cultures, coz just having a degree doesn't necessarily make you tolerant.

10. What takes you down the fastest?

Intolerance and discrimination.

11. Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?

I honestly don't know where I'll be; but in terms of what .... hopefully a mum of two and aunt to more nieces & nephews :), and a better artist, cook, writer & photographer than I am today.

12. What’s your fear?

Falling down steps .... seriously, I'm phobic about going down steps :)

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

An idealistic soul with a practical mind; devoted wife & mum yet an individual in her own right.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?

Married to hubby ..... I can handle anything with him by my side.

15. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously who will you pick?

I don't think you can love two people simultaneously. Love for me means a lifelong responsibility & commitment to one person; if someone else is also in the picture, it can't be love.....probably just a serious infatuation :)

16. Would you give all in a relationship?

Otherwise what is the point?

17. Would you forgive and forget someone no matter how horrible a thing he has done?

The basic prayer of Christianity is the 'Our Father' which clearly states that God forgives you in the same way you forgive others; if I don't forgive, I can't expect God's forgiveness either. I recite this prayer daily, and in my book, to keep saying it and then not even try to do it makes the prayer pointless. So even though I don't forget, I do try to forgive and continue to be good to those who have hurt me.

18. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?

Hubby has enhanced my life, so definitely with him :D

19. List of people to tag (alphabetically):

The Axe Effect

2008-09-20T16:00:00.000+05:30

Not that this blog is turning into some sort of house-pest-story center, but Mystique Wanderer (ahem!) kindly directed me to what he'd written on lizards, and that reminded me about our most recent lizard incident ..... cannot believe I forgot about this one!

I headed to the bathroom one night & pushed the door open only to see a lizard dash across the front of the door around to the back. Naturally, I screamed and dashed off to hubby, utterly traumatized at the thought of a lizard in my bathroom. Seeing my state, hubby very gallantly told me he would take care of it, and I went off to use the guest bathroom.

I could hear him moving around and the sounds of paper and plastic rustling, and when I came out, he stood there with a plastic bag securely knotted up in his hand, a big grin on his face. I asked him if the lizard was inside it. Yes, he replied proudly.

Amazed, I stared at him, wondering how on earth he'd managed to catch a lizard and that too in a matter of minutes. Just as I was about to ask him, my olfactory sense registered the presence of a very powerful fragrance.

"Did you spray your deo?????"

Still grinning, he described what he'd done: he managed to scare the lizard into coming out of the bathroom and onto the adjacent wall. He didn't want to kill it, but at the same time we needed it out of the house. So he placed a newspaper on the floor under the lizard and grabbed whatever aerosol was closest ..... in this case, Axe!!!

One good direct spurt and the lizard fell onto the paper. It was very much alive .... just moving around like a drunk. He scooped up the paper, lizard and all, into the plastic bag, tied it up and waited for me to make my entrance.

I just stared at him, stunned. The laughter only came after he went out, opened the bag and left it at the corner we leave our garbage in.

So there you have it, ladies & gentlemen, our version of The Axe Effect :D

Rat Tales

2008-09-18T11:35:00.000+05:30

I was over at Reflections' blog, reading her post on a rat ..... invasion ??? no, too harsh a term for a single rat. Anyway, it brought to mind my own rat story, which I started to type as a comment over there......then realised well, this is too long for a comment, so I may as well turn it into a post.

A few years ago, someone accidentally left the drain cover underneath the kitchen sink open once. I was curled up in the living room which faces the kitchen and was leisurely reading away when I sensed some movement in front of me......a big fat rat scurries from under the sink across the kitchen and goes under the fridge. And I just froze!!! I must've sat there like 5 minutes just staring at that spot when my sister entered & looked at me in her usual way..... like I'm a bit slow in the head.

I told her what I saw & in the next instant, she's beside me on the sofa, legs up and we're both staring at the kitchen floor. After a few minutes we see the miserable thing run back to under the sink and we both cover our faces with cushions & smother our squeals .... coz mom was taking her afternoon siesta & if she didn't catch her one-hour nap, she was prone to headaches the following day.

So there we were .... two teenage girls (ok ok, in all honesty, I was about 20), quivering with fear on the sofa, cushions held in a deathgrip, till mommy woke up & came to our rescue. When we told her what'd happened, she looked at us like the ninnies we were and then stalked off to examine the drain under the sink. After poking around there a bit (and yes, we were still on the sofa while our mother was in the danger zone) and not finding anything, she declared that the rat must've returned back down the drain. She put the cover back firmly in place, and went about her work. Only then did sis and me gingerly keep our feet back on the floor and return to normal (or abnormal, as some would term it!)

Anyway, I guess its always easy to fall apart when you know there's someone who'll watch out for you. Thank you Mom!!!

Onam in Pictures

2008-09-15T11:35:00.000+05:30

Being Christians, the festival of Onam is not one of religious significance for us, but definitely of cultural importance from the Keralite perspective. This year was the first time I've celebrated the festival in the land of its origin, and since the whole family on hubby's side was together, we went all-out to make it memorable.

Our humble first-time effort at making the traditional pookalam (flower carpet) in front of the house, a totally family affair with hubby & me drawing the main outlines and everyone else involved in plucking petals and carefully filling in the design. The second pic has a fork in the corner ..... our "sophisticated" pookalam shaping tool :D

Our Onam sadya (meal) served traditionally in the banana leaf.

A row of elephants at a nearby temple; there was to be a major procession later in the evening, but the rain decided otherwise. Fortunately, it let up enough for a fireworks display later that night. Unfortunately, my night-time photography skills aren't worth mentioning, forget about blogging :), so that's pretty much it for this post.

Awarded!

2008-09-08T11:35:00.002+05:30

Renu gave me this award, meant for sites and blogs that are smart and brilliant in their content or design. Many thanks to you, Renu, more so for the reason you said you have given me this. I am truly touched :)

And since appreciation always feels great, whoever came up with this award idea (good on you!) decided to spread the cheer. The rules are:

1. When you receive the prize you must write a post showing it, together with the name of who has given it to you, and link them back.

2. Choose a minimum of 7 blogs (or even more) that you find brilliant in their content or design.

3. Show their names and links and leave them a comment informing they were prized with ‘Brilliant Weblog'.

4. Show a picture of those who awarded you and those you give the prize (optional).

5. And pass it on!

Right, now most of the blogs I read have already been awarded, and deservedly so. And since I don't get out that much into the blogosphere, I doubt I know seven other blogs. But the ones I do know and like, here you go:

1. Jay: for his take on music, movies etc. I may not always agree with what he writes (:P), but I do enjoy his writing.

2. Thought Warp: a like-minded soul with some great poetry in there.

3. Moi: for her amazing photo-blog.

4. Global Themes: a collaborative photo-blog I just had to be a part of the moment I came across it. I think one of my buddies there has already passed this award on, but doesn't matter, I think it deserves another!

5. Bombay Addict: simply for being a Bombay addict; he writes on a lot of stuff, but his Bombay-based posts are what I really like.

Keep it brilliant people!!!

A Life of Joy

2008-09-01T15:10:00.007+05:30

A few days ago, I watched "The Bucket List". Two total strangers - an arrogant billionaire (played by Jack Nicholson) and an ordinary mechanic (played by Morgan Freeman) - with nothing in common except that they've both been diagnosed with cancer, wind up sharing a hospital room. Witness to each other's sufferings during the course of their treatment, they eventually become friends.

Confronted by the fact that he's got just months left, Freeman's character Carter starts jotting down a 'bucket list' - a list of all the things he would like to do before he "kicks the bucket". Nicholson's character Edward also puts in his suggestions, and since he's got nothing but money, says they should just go out and do it, instead of waiting for the cancer to claim them.

And that's what the movie's all about - them doing the things and seeing the places they've always wanted to, in the process bringing about a much-needed transformation in each other, so that they return better men to spend whatever time they have left with their families.

It may not be a great film for many people (hubby dear, your guru Roger Ebert gave it only a 1-star rating), but I quite liked it and sentimental fool that I am, even shed a few tears at the ending.

But there was this one idea / thought / philosophy in the film that I felt was very important, and which is what prompted this post. There's a scene where both characters are in Egypt, sitting atop a pyramid or something. Carter, who is a history buff, is telling Edward about the Egyptian concept of heaven. He says that when people died, they were asked two questions at the gates of heaven, and their answers determined whether or not they got in.

Question 1: Did you find joy in your life?

Pretty easy, right? I suppose most of us would have a resounding YES right away.

Question 2: Did your life bring joy to others?

Not so easy, isn't it? Can you answer 'yes' as quickly or firmly as you would have for the first? I couldn't. Not right away. I thought of my family and friends, and I'm ..... reasonably sure that overall, I'm a joy for them (though inside, there is this niggling guilt for all the times I know I haven't been).

My motto in life, the one defining statement I try to live by is Christ's "Love one another as you love yourself", which is why these questions truly struck a chord. It doesn't say that you shouldn't be happy, no. You absolutely should. But just as you would be happy and find joy in your life ..... you need to care that others do too.

The Horsey Truth about Railroads

2008-08-28T20:46:00.003+05:30

Received this in an email today. It's long, but worth reading!

________

The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used?

Because that's the way they built them in England, and English expatriates built the US Railroads.

Why did the English build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.

Why did 'they' use that gauge then?

Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.

Okay! Why did the wagons have that particular odd wheel spacing?

Well, if they tried to use any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads in England, because that's the spacing of the wheel ruts.

So who built those old rutted roads?

Imperial Rome built the first long distance roads in Europe (and England) for their legions. The roads have been used ever since.

And the ruts in the roads?

Roman war chariots formed the initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagon wheels. Since the chariots were made for Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing.

The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet,8.5 inches is derived from the original specifications for an Imperial Roman war chariot. And bureaucracies live forever.

So the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what Horse's Ass came up with it, you may be exactly right, because that's what the Imperial Roman army figured. Chariots were made just wide enough to accommodate the back ends of two war horses.

Now, the twist to the story.

When you see a Space Shuttle sitting on its launchpad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are solid rocket boosters or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at their factory at Utah. The engineers who designed the SRBs would have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site.

The railroad line from the factory happens to run through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad track, as you now know, is about as wide as two horses' behinds.

So, a major Space Shuttle design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the width of a horse's ass.

- And - You thought being a HORSE'S ASS wasn't important!

__________

I laughed so hard when I read this!!! But then I wondered, how many things do we do today simply because that's the way they've "always" been done? How many things we just blindly follow without even once asking why?

Lost in Subtitles!

2008-08-27T16:06:00.004+05:30

So last night, my sister and I sat down for a long-awaited (at least by me!) bonding session, or what she calls, "sistah-sistah bonding" :) Now, don't expect any heart-to-hearts or baring of souls; we bond over movies! We've got certain "classics" - movies that we've watched (and watched and watched and watched....) during lazy summer afternoons, usually with a game of Scrabble on the side.

One of these classics is the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy. We've got DVDs of all three, bought before they were released as a set. Unfortunately, the third movie DVD doesn't work, so we had the difficult (sigh!) task of choosing between the first two. We finally settled on the second one - The Two Towers - for its superbly filmed battle scenes.

Halfway through, my sister decides to switch on the subtitles ...... there are certain dialogues neither of us have caught, despite having watched it sooo many times. She activated the subtitle feature and then......a split second of stunned disbelief, before we burst into laughter!!! See, the DVD is um, not-so-original, and was made somewhere in the Far East, and whoever provided the subtitles was obviously not well-versed in English, so this action-packed epic instantly turned into a hilarious comedy!!!

Check out the names of the characters:

The tiny Hobbit hero Frodo Baggins became "Flordor Barkings"
The human hero Aragorn became "Alarwang"
The elf Legolas was "Keglax" or something like that.
The creature Smeagol becomes "Smartfy" (really can't see the leap of thought to this name).
Dark Lord Sauron's monstrous army of Uruk-hai were oddly referred to as "Bitch-Men"!
And finally, the best of all, the wizard Gandalf the Grey - "Grey Magic Person Gandofu"!!!

The dialogue was no less. Sadly, I can't recall most of it, except for this gem, where Aragorn is explaining to his immortal Elvish ladylove Arwen (thankfully her name was only missing the 'r'), why they can't be together:

The actual line is "I am mortal, you are elf-clan".

Subtitle: "I am ordinary, you are evil"!!!

And that was another riot: all references to elves somehow ended up as "evil"! Even the F-word found its way into one dialogue!!! Now I haven't read the books, but I'm guessing there's no way its mentioned in the mythical masterpiece!

So here's a suggestion: if you have DVDs from suspect sources, try watching it with the subtitles on. You might find the dramas and thrillers turning into comedies and the comedies getting even more comical :D

My Quirks :)

2008-08-18T17:29:00.000+05:30

Tagged again, this time by Renu. The Rules are:

1. Link the person who tagged you.
2. Mention the rules on your blog.
3. Tell 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger's blogs, letting them know that they have been tagged.

Right, so brace yourself for the quirks:

1. I am drawn to the colour red. Its my absolute favourite colour family and I can never have enough of it, so much so that during my college days, there were times when I would step out with a red t-shirt, red handbag, red shoes, red hair clip, red jewellery and even a red cell phone, prompting my beloved sister to inquire if a tomato had vomited on me! The dressing has toned down a tad these days :), but I still have plenty of reds all around me ..... just look at the name of this blog, for instance! Its not the white moon or the yellow moon, but the red moon that especially fascinates me, which kind of takes us to Quirk 2.....

2. ...... that its not just the moon, but the whole sky that I love (does that sound a bit crazy???) I am an avid, ardent, absolutely passionate skygazer (not that I know the first thing about astronomy or even care to know for that matter). Dawn sky, morning sky, noon sky, evening sky, night sky......I love it all! I skygaze quite frequently during the day, to the point that I sometimes forget what I was doing or saying before the sky caught my eye, which leads to Quirk 3....

3..... I am addicted to my camera....have been for over a year now. I could see the sky looking a particularly gorgeous shade of blue, or see an amazing cloud formation, or see trees and their flowers looking especially lovely against the sky, or see......just about anything beautiful, and I'm off running for my camera. I briefly studied photography in college, but just vaguely recall terms like 'f-stops', 'aperture', 'shutter-speed' etc. As with the astronomy thing, I'm not sure I even want to learn about photography...... I'm happier muddling about on my own and manically keep clicking away, much to the frustration of my family (though recently hubby has also started clicking stuff that appeals to him......it seems that I've infected him with the photo bug too......(evil laugh!!!)).

4. I am a doodler. Put a pen and paper in my hand and almost right off, I'll start doodling away. I love applying mehendi and am constantly trying out different designs, so its quite a common sight in my house to see newspapers, post-its, (my notebooks from college) and other miscellaneous papers covered with the typical mehendi motifs as well as whatever weird patterns emerge from my mind.

5. I detest spending time in beauty parlours. I could never understand how some women spend soooo much time in these places for the most frivolous of reasons. All my life, the only reason I entered a parlour was to get my hair cut. Thanks to my mother, I am quite particular about taking care of my skin and hair, but it is all based on natural, DIY kind of stuff. It was only after my wedding date was fixed that I got my first official facial and massage, and it was only for my engagement that I first got my eyebrows plucked. A massage once in a while actually would be quite nice, but I absolutely hate the fact that I now have to go to a parlour twice a month to keep my eyebrows neat. All that time and effort spent in going and coming, when I could be doing something else, anything else.

6. Right from when I was a child, I have loved making chapatis - the flat Indian bread. I remember hounding my mother, my grandmother or whoever else was rolling the dough out to pleeeeeaaaase let me help. They all thought the fascination would die out as I grew older, but till date, it hasn't. I enjoy the whole process, right from kneading the dough, to rolling it out and the final cooking. I actually find it very relaxing, and even when exams were around the corner, I would still ask my mom to keep a few aside for me to roll out. But the best part is when I make phulkas (a variation where you put the chapati directly onto the flame and it fluffs out into a sphere). For me, the moment where it expands into that sphere is extremely fulfilling, almost like attaining nirvana!

So there you have it, 6 quirks from the quirk. To continue the quirkiness, I tag some of the GT gang: Sha'ira, DR, DC, Lirun, Moi and NZM.

Hell's Chicken

2008-08-09T14:56:00.004+05:30

Well, I'm back for a month-long sojourn in the sandlands, and quite determined to capture slices of life this time round (as best as I can manage without being clobbered by my camera-weary family). Stepped out to pick up some good ol' Lebanese food last night......

...... and here it is, one of the sights that warms my non-vegetarian heart :)

Book Tagged

2008-08-04T15:23:00.001+05:30

At long last my Internet troubles have been resolved, and what do I find when I rejoin the blogging world???

My very first TAG, courtesy of Reflections. So, without much further ado, here are the Rules:

1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.

2) Italicize those you intend to read.

3) Underline the books you really love (and strikethrough the ones you hate!).

4) Reprint this list in your own blog.

----------

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen

2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien

3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte

4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling

5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee

6 The Bible

7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte

8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell

9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman

10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens

11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott

12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy

13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller

14 Complete Works of Shakespeare

15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier

16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien

17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks

18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger

19 The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger

20 Middlemarch - George Eliot

21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell

22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald

23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens

24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy

25 The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams

26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh

27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky

28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck

29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll

30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame

31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy

32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens

33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis

34 Emma - Jane Austen

35 Persuasion - Jane Austen

36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis

37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini

38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres

39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden

40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne

41 Animal Farm - George Orwell

42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown

43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez

44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving

45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins

46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery

47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy

48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood

49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding

50 Atonement - Ian McEwan

51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel

52 Dune - Frank Herbert

53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons

54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen

55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth

56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon

57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens

58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley

59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon

60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez

61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck

62 Lolita - Vladimir Naboko

v63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt

64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold

65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas (children's version.....does that count???)

66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac

67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy

68 Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding

69 Midnights Children – Salman Rushdie

70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville

71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens

72 Dracula - Bram Stoker

73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett

74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson

75 Ulysses - James Joyce

76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath

77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome

78 Germinal - Emile Zola

79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray

80 Possession - AS Byatt

81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens

82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell

83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker

84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro

85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert

86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry

87 Charlotte's Web - EB White

88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom

89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle - quite a few of them, though I have to say I prefer Hercule Poirot.

90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton

91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad

92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery

93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks

94 Watership Down - Richard Adams

95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole

96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute

97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas

98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare

99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl

100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

My Score - a paltry 10/100. I am a voracious reader, but usually of the romance novel and action-packed thrillers a la Clive Cussler with the occassional spiritual lift from Paulo Coelho, Robin Sharma and the like. My forays into "classic" literature have been few and far between, the last one being a four-day immersion into One Hundred Years of Solitude about a month ago. Brilliantly written, but quite disturbing......I have only just shaken off the after-effects. Catcher in the Rye is next on my list, but I'm in no hurry to pick it up.

In the meanwhile, I tag:

Jay

Preethi

Thought Warp

The Importance of Imagination

2008-07-10T18:42:00.002+05:30

In the continuing quirks of the blogosphere, I came across a post of another Pottermaniac (yes, if I haven’t ever mentioned it here before, let me do so now…..I am a diehard Harry Potter fan!!!). In this post, the blogger includes J. K. Rowling’s recent speech at Harvard’s 2008 commencement ceremony. It is a self-deprecatingly humourous and humble discourse titled ‘The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and The Importance of Imagination’.

What really grabbed me was Rowling’s impassioned advocation of imagination. Defining the term more broadly than its usual meaning, she says, “Imagination is not only the uniquely human capacity to envision that which is not, and therefore the fount of all invention and innovation. In its arguably most transformative and revelatory capacity, it is the power that enables us to empathise with humans whose experiences we have never shared.”

She then goes on to share some heartrending incidents from when she worked for Amnesty International, a time that she describes as “one of the greatest formative experiences” of her life. At Amnesty, she witnessed both the incredible evilness, but more importantly, the tremendous goodness of humanity towards humanity; a goodness which is possible because we can imagine what it would feel like to be persecuted and tortured, and therefore empathise with those who have actually undergone such brutalities, and therefore act..... act in whatever way possible with our talents and abilities to prevent such horrible crimes against humanity.

Rowling’s audience of Harvard’s graduating class of 2008 certainly have more talent and ability than most of us, and will assuredly hold important places in their societies. To these shapers of tomorrow, she asks that they use their power to fight for the powerless, because “We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better.”

I was so deeply moved by these words that I had to pass it on immediately to family and friends for one, simply because it is an inspirational message, and two, because we could all use a reminder now and then that we each have a moral responsibility to lend a helping hand to those lesser privileged than us in whatever way we can.

I was also curious to see how the speech had been received and so, came across this article on NPR. While most of the Harvard seniors were blown away by Rowling, some were less than impressed. It was interesting to see the reasons why some people took objection:

“…we’re Harvard….we should be able to get anyone….we’re settling here.”

“They should have picked a leader to speak…not a children’s writer.” And so on.

Here are people to whom appearances matter much more than the message, people so full of their own importance that the importance of imagination just passes them by. They may have completed their education from the best university in the world, but are yet to mature to the point of understanding that wisdom can come not only from “leaders”, but from others as well, a “children’s writer” included.

Ultimately, we survive and thrive as a species because in some way or the other, at some point or the other, we help each other out. Without these simple values of humility, empathy and compassion, Harvard-educated or not, you don’t amount to much as a human being.

Pasta and Chips Salad

2008-07-09T20:41:00.005+05:30

A few weeks ago I started to prepare our usual salad for dinner, which is basically just chopped cucumber and carrot, when my eye fell on the half-a yellow-pepper-from-the-day-before and some sweet and juicy mangoes that hubby kept cut and ready in the fridge. I sometimes get "creative" fits in the kitchen when I'm a bit fed up (literally!) of eating the same stuff. So I put together a salad of chopped cucumber, yellow pepper and mango with a dressing of lemon juice, cumin (jeera) powder and salt. It may seem like a strange combination, but it was absolutely yummy!

Today, I ended up having leftover yellow pepper and mangoes again, and also some farfalle pasta (the butterfly-shaped one) from last night's dinner. So I made the same salad as before, and added the pasta as well, after cutting it in half to make the pieces the same size as the veggies. I kept the bowl on the table and we kept helping ourselves now and then, when inspiration struck. I got a bag of balsamic vinegar flavoured chips (the latest Lays offering in India), crumbled them up and tossed them in. This may seem even stranger, but it was Deelicious!!! Its great to go from the mushiness of the mango to the creaminess of the pasta to the increasingly crispy crispness from the pepper to the cucumber to the chips......why oh why, did we eat so fast???

In Bloom

2008-07-07T20:09:00.004+05:30

A few years ago in Bombay, I realized how much a room came alive just by placing some flowers in it. I was lucky enough to have several small-time florists (and by florists, I mean guys with bunches of flowers and a tarp for a roof) all within walking distance from home. So picking up a few flowers became a weekly routine......nothing extravagant, just a couple of carnations, or some gerberra stalks, or a single shoot of orchids. Going about daily chores, or coming home after a long day and seeing those cheerful blooms always put the cheer back in me too.

In the few months that I've called Bangalore home, last week was the first time that I bought some flowers - 2 rosebuds to be exact and a sprig of fillers.

I miss the easy accessibility to flowers that I enjoyed in Bombay; florists - big and small-time - aren't exactly within walking distance here. But in all fairness, they're not too out of my usual way, and after seeing these babies, I'm definitely willing to go the extra bit to get them!

Lourdes - Part 2

2008-06-04T11:39:00.009+05:30

The main pilgrimage centre at Lourdes called 'The Sanctuary of Our Lady of Lourdes', was a short walk from our hotel. Pictured below is the Rosary Basilica. During the time of the major Catholic feasts and festivals, the town is overwhelmed by pilgrims from across the globe. However, since our stay didn't coincide with any of the main events, the crowd level was at a pleasant bustle.

You can call me fanciful, but I swear the moment I stepped through the gates of the Sanctuary, it was as if the buzz of the world right outside the walled compound hushed away...... a nearly tangible sense of peace descended over me. We had hoped to attend a Mass and as it turned out, one was just about to start, although in French. Though we didn't understand a word, it was one of the most moving church experiences of my life partly because of the priest who sang the hymns with such faith and conviction that language was not a barrier, and partly at the sight of people from so many nationalities harmoniously sitting together in prayer.

The Rosary Basilica as viewed from the back. The River Gave flows along the Sanctuary and is tied into Lourdes's miraculous legacy. Between February-March 1858, a 14-year old local girl, Bernadette Soubirous, saw 18 apparitions of the Virgin Mary at a place called Massabielle. Although Bernadette was surrounded by hundreds and thousands of curious onlookers during the later apparitions, she was the only one to see the Virgin. It was during one of the later apparitions that theVirgin asked her to drink from a stream (an offshoot of the Gave), which was quite muddy at the time. This was a form of penance for the sinners of the world. Since that time, the waters of the stream have had miraculous healing properties.

The young Bernadette devoted her life then on to the church as a nun, but died young in 1879 after a prolonged and painful illness. The Catholic church, quite rigourous when it comes to legitimizing miracles and visions, had taken four years to declare the apparitions as real after their occurence and Bernadette was sainted only in 1933. Another intriguing part about this humble saint is that her body has not decomposed. It can be viewed intact at another shrine in a place called Nevers, which was she had taken her vows.

This is the Grotto of Massabielle. The statue in the niche is that of The Virgin Mary in the spot where the apparitions occured. The stream that Bernadette drank from flows in the grotto beneath. The Basilica's foundations rest over this holy spot and the faithful gather here to pray and light candles.

Lourdes - Part 1

2008-05-23T10:52:00.013+05:30

Getting back to Tourope, I've decided to start at the end rather than the beginning. The little town of Lourdes in the south of France was not part of the package tour, but is renowned as a Christian pilgrimage destination due to the appearance of Mother Mary to a young girl (St. Bernadette) and the consequent miraculous powers of the river that runs through Lourdes. Our tour ended in Paris, and so my parents felt that we should make the extra effort and visit Lourdes.

We'd had an extraordinarily wonderful three weeks in Europe, but all that changed the morning we were to depart for Lourdes. Our tour guide had told us we would have no problem getting a taxi to the train station from our hotel in Paris. Just to make sure we wouldn't be delayed, we stepped out nearly 2 hours in advance and waited out front.....and kept waiting and waiting and waiting for the surprisingly elusive taxis. Repeated visits to the concierge proved fruitless as they kept saying that we would get taxis. The only other option was to take the subway train which was not tempting as we were loaded down with four heavy suitcases plus hand baggage and as anyone who's travelled through these systems knows that while they're great for daily commutes, the never-ending staircases and winding corridors aren't easy navigation with luggage.

Finally, my frustrated father insisted they call for a taxi, which they did only to stay on hold for like half an hour. When we were about 45 minutes from the train departure time, it dawned on the hotel staff that since the airshow was going on, the rest of the city would likely be facing a taxi shortage. We were mad enough to get into a fight.....I mean, come on, this is the world famous Paris airshow, its been going on in their city for years and they only tell us about the taxis after 2 hours????

We were then left with no choice but to take the subway. And what a nightmarish trip that was!!! I'm not going to dwell on the details now. Of course we ended up missing our train, had to cough up some more Euros for tickets on a later train and then cooled our heels for a few hours at the station. Needless to say, we weren't in the best of moods. We weren't left with a favourable impression of the Parisians at the hotel and didn't know what to expect ahead at Lourdes.

However, the 5-hour train ride went smoothly. We arrived at the sleepy little station at Lourdes and thankfully, stepped into a taxi right outside. We drove through quaint roads, got a passing glimpse of the main shrine before turning onto a street lined with narrow buildings practically sticking to each other - all hotels to accomodate the millions of pilgrims and tourists who arrive every year. I was a bit apprehensive as I was the one who'd chosen the hotel and all I'd had to guide me were Internet reviews. But it turned out to be quite nice - cozy, warm interiors bustling with cheerful groups of pilgrims from all over the world. The staff at reception were friendly too, a welcome change from those at the Paris hotel. In fact, the man who checked us in was an Arab who'd recently moved to Lourdes from Dubai! He was delighted when we said we'd come from Abu Dhabi.

After that pleasant welcome, we went up to our rooms. I did a cursory neatness-cleanliness check and then headed straight to that which for me, determines the worth of a room - its view. All I'll write now is that my jaw dropped. I'll let the pictures speak the rest of it.

The River Gave that runs through Lourdes flowed right next to our hotel and all those other buildings you see, also hotels. Our hotel had hanging balconies, so I was quite literally standing over the river!

****

The 1000 year old Chateau Fort atop a hill overlooking River Gave.

Fancy Dress Competition at Cannes

2008-05-22T15:20:00.006+05:30

And the clear winner is..........Jaya Bachchan for her clever impersonation of a cabbage!

Seriously lady, what the hell were you thinking????

Revisiting Europe

2008-05-19T10:15:00.003+05:30

May 2007 - not only was I frantically struggling to complete my dissertation for that one piece of paper which would deem me a 'Master', I was also accompanying my mother on an equally frantic round of trips to apply for & collect visas for our family's dream European vacation. Everything went off smoothly and we left on June 3rd 2007 for one of the best times we've ever had. I started to blog the experience here, but didn't get around to completing it (yes, procrastination is one of my weaknesses).

Europe has never been far from my mind since, but it was only recently when I was showing the pictures to my husband, that the tremendous beauty of all the big things and the small things that made up our trip, hit me all over again. And this time round, I will do full justice to Tourope.

IPL: Initial Impressions

2008-04-18T22:38:00.003+05:30

The Indian Premiere League has just kicked off, and the first match is on the verge of ending with Shah Rukh Khan's Knight Riders pulling off an emphatic win thanks to Brendan McCullum's fabulous century. Which brings me to how.....well, weird this is. Not in a bad way, no. It just seems so.......unreal, somehow. It was one thing when it was just on paper, but now that its unfolding in front of my eyes, its so strange to see Rahul Dravid captain the likes of Jacques Kallis & Mark Boucher, incredible to hear an Indian audience go wild cheering on McCullum & Ricky Ponting as they slam sixes and perhaps the most unbelievable image of the night, at least for me - Ricky Ponting joyfully hugging Ishant Sharma when he took Dravid's wicket, the same Sharma who plagued Ponting & his men only a few short weeks ago.

Hmm.....this is going to take some getting used to.

Word Powered!

2008-04-10T09:16:00.003+05:30

I am thrilled to bits!!! I just solved today's Times of India crossword - the entire thing - for the very first time!!! Ok, so I admit, the clues were a bit easier than usual, and yes, I had to resort to all-knowing Google for a couple of clues, but at least I learnt that 'Gar' is a type of long-jawed fish and 'Anjou' is a pear variety and there was an actress named 'Gwen Verdon'. Not bad for 9 30 am on a Thursday morning!

P.S.: Suddenly reminded of that Friends episode where Rachel finally solves a crossword by herself and she has no one to hug, and poor Gunther comes jumping over.....lol!!!!

Food and me

2008-03-12T09:11:00.003+05:30

Some months ago, the topic of discussion on a radio program I used to tune into centred on food, and how one could control food intake. One method is to try and not think of food. Apparently, there's two kinds of people - those that think of food a lot, and those that just don't. Not think of food???? Freaks!!!!!

I love food. Really love food. Not in a gluttonous sense that I'm gorging every other minute, but that I like the anticipation of what my three meals of the day will be, and of course, the relishing of every morsel during the meal. I come from a totally foodie family, where nearly everyone is at the very least, a good cook, if not a great one.

Before marriage, my relationship with food (yes, I believe you have relationships with food) was based on me doing the eating only. I'd help out my mom, who is one of the most exceptional cooks I know, but I was never tempted to cook anything on my own. I baked, though. I love cakes & all sorts of confectionery, so after moving to the UAE and finding the best of ingredients readily available, I threw myself into baking....and found that while I liked what I prepared, it was more satisfying to see my creations being savoured and enjoyed by others.

But now.... I'm coming to realise that its infinitely more fulfilling to prepare the food we eat on a daily basis. The first dish that I made, rather nervously, was a simple stir-fry chicken, one that I'd seen my mom throw together countless times. And the review from hubby was that it was good. Confidence boosted, I went ahead. Its been over a month since that day, and I'm more relaxed now. It hasn't all been smooth sailing....I have had my disasters and no doubt, will continue to encounter them from time to time, but I'm not going to let that stop me. The key to any relationship is hard work and commitment, and food is no different.

Somewhere along the way, my relationship with food has evolved, and I've come to love preparing it as much as I love savouring it. I actually enjoy planning the menu for the week, enjoy sifting through recipes, especially enjoy tweaking those recipes a bit, and of course, I enjoy the process of cooking itself. I've channelled my creative juices into many activities before, but this is so much better! Its an incredibly heartwarming high to see my food being totally relished, and God.....a deliciously rewarding experience overall!!!

Blessed

2008-02-25T15:14:00.006+05:30

Blogger's block. Soooo much has happened in my life since the turn of the year, actually since the last few months of the old year, but I can't find the words to put it all together. I've been meaning to, wanting to, been playing the words around in my head, but I can't.....blogger's block. Or is it?

Now that I'm actually putting this down, I'm realizing that its not really a block. I feel. Soooo much that its just too huge to put into words. 'Humbled', 'awed', 'grateful', 'loved'.....they begin to cover it, but only just. So I think I'll leave the words aside, and simply feel. Feel all of these things, and above all of them, feel blessed. Blessed for the family I was born into, blessed for the family I just got married into, blessed for my man.

My symbol of peace

2007-12-18T17:01:00.000+05:30

'First time' occurrence today: saw the moon, or at least a pale shadow of it, at 1 p. m.

What's so special, you might ask. Well.....I love the moon. I love looking at it. The sight of the moon, whether a faint crescent or a brightly glowing orb, has always put a smile on my face, even in the worst of my moods.

I tend to overthink things - small things, big things, something is always going on in my head, and its easy to get overwhelmed by it all sometimes. But when I see the moon, its like everything.....calms down. I feel at peace, especially if its a brightly glowing full moon.

But the biggest treat, and to me, one of the most glorious sights in all of nature's wonder, is a red moonrise. I've only ever caught glimpses of it, usually while travelling - twisting and turning in my seat to see it better :)

It's one of my deepest desires to have enough time and of course, be in the right place, to watch a red moon rise, uninterrupted. I think I've blogged about this before, but it's worth remembering again.....I feel peaceful.

Keep running

2007-12-10T17:38:00.000+05:30

"Sometimes life is like a treadmill:

you keep running, but you get nowhere."

This came to me as I walked passed a gym yesterday and saw someone on a treadmill. At the time, I thought I was having one of my (rare) moments of insight, but now I can't help thinking that I've read this somewhere. Hmmm.

Interesting thought, anyway. Pessimistic, but interesting.

Numb

2007-11-22T16:30:00.000+05:30

I want to feel something, anything
but all I feel is numb.
No valid reason, no annoying rhyme.
Just a fog-like insulation
Keeping things from sinking in.
No, I'm not hooked on anything,
I'm completely addiction-free.
Is that the problem???
Heh, of course not (a smile, at last!)

(Maybe I'll just start with this for now)

My sexy cold voice.....NOT!

2007-11-14T12:25:00.000+05:30

If I were to sing a song today, say an Abba classic, here's how it'd go:

"Babba bia (sniff)
now I reallzhy know (sniiiiiiifff)
by by, I couldh neber let you go...."

(sniiiiiiiifffffff)

- Shalobh

Life is a Cycle

2007-11-13T17:33:00.000+05:30

Picking up where I left off:

Life is a cycle…
and I'm learning to ride.
Though I fall
more often than I move ahead,
beyond the burn
of every bruise
lies a lesson
waiting to be learnt:
sometimes in confidence,
sometimes in humility;
sometimes in turning the other cheek,
sometimes in an eye for an eye.

Contradictions? Yes.
For isn't that the answer
to cycling well:
Finding your balance.

© me

What it is we hold on to

2007-11-06T17:48:00.000+05:30

I don't think I'm the sort of person who enthusiastically embraces change, or at least not in my personal life. It's not that I avoid change, no. I accept, I face and I move on.....but in my own time and in my own way, after much dwelling on my life as it has been..... savouring the good, learning from the bad.

I love introspection (just realised that!) I do it all the time, but I’ve just realised that I love it as I type these words. Funny how realisations strike sometimes!

I love going over my life..... people I've met & loved & sometimes lost… things I've done & seen & said.....I think I’ve emerged stronger and wiser through all of it.

So, recently when my friend ThoughtWarp mused over “What it is that we hold on to?”, I had so many answers. Moments that are with you all the time, moments that lie in the back of your mind; forgotten moments that are relived and relished when you see an old photo, talk to an old friend, maybe read an old post???

I totally agree that it isn’t possible to “capture” life in its entirety. But I think its worth the effort to hold every precious moment possible, especially when you’re faced with change….and life as you know it will never be the same.

Thanks to the Romance Novel

2007-09-07T19:34:00.000+05:30

My favourite genre of fiction is romance - contemporary, historical, 'paranormal'.....doesn't matter, I love them all. I've been reading romances for nearly 10 years now and the attraction still hasn't waned. Some might snidely & cynically dismiss it to getting cheap thrills, but no, that's not it. I'm basically a sentimental, romantic fool at heart, forced to adopt a practical facade to survive this world. So in those moments when there's no one to be practical for, I like to indulge the fool.

Giving in to the "practical" requests of some, I have, on occasion, tried to "elevate" my reading preferences. I once forced myself to read a V. S. Naipaul - a book so unmemorable that I have forgotten its name. Other brushes with "literature" (namely, Nathaniel Hawthorne's 'The House of Seven Gables' and Daphne du Maurier's 'Rebecca' and 'The Scapegoat' ) were not so bad. I wouldn't rave about these books, because at the end, I was left oddly unsettled, melancholy even. Then again, to be great, art should evoke some emotion in the recipient, even if the emotion is less than positive.

Therein, I suppose, lies one of the reasons I continue to stand by romance novels. Who couldn't help but feel positive after a happy ending? But why I am truly thankful to romance novels, is for all the interesting snippets of information I've gained over the years: food habits, social practices, arts, languages, geographical & historical facts......worlds now and past have been opened for me.

However, what led to this post is something I read last night in a historical romance. One of the characters quoted a couplet that quite literally, made my heart jolt.

"All nature is but art, unknown to thee;
All chance, direction, which thou canst not see;
All discord, harmony not understood;
All partial evil, universal good.
And, spite of pride, in erring reason's spite,
One truth is clear, 'Whatever is, is right.'"

The source? Essay on Man (Epistle 1) by Alexander Pope. I would never have read Pope's work just based on the fact that he's one of the greats (in fact, I once began reading Rape of the Lock, but didn't feel compelled to continue), but this, this was just divine and I had to read it all. So, my sincere thanks to Martine Berne (author of the historical romance) for including these lines, and to that supreme, unseen force that directed me to this book.

2007-09-03T00:01:00.000+05:30

Close to a month since I last posted....not for lack of things to write about, no......just the disinclination to sit in front of the computer again after spending all day in front of it. So.....ideas, impressions, observations, opinions have just been floating around in the muddle that is my brain.

One wisp of an idea, in particular, has been with me for a long time..... something I'd like to build into a poem (I'm an occasional poet.....though those occassions have been few and far between). The words are all in my head, but they don't seem to.....fit, just yet. So just to nudge myself along & begin at the beginning:

Life is a cycle.........and I'm learning to ride......

The Enigma of War

2007-08-11T23:04:00.000+05:30

When one thinks of war, the images typically evoked are those of camouflaged soldiers, bloodied or burnt bodies, the flash of gunfire, devasted lands, skies greyed by dust and smoke. Those of us blessed enough to never have witnessed any of this firsthand can imagine these visuals thanks to the media & the moviemakers. But this frontline combat and its horrifying consequences are not the start and finish of any war.

I recently watched a movie called Enigma, based on a book by Robert Harris, starring Dougray Scott and Kate Winslet. Set in the UK's codebreaking center during WWII, its basically about how Scott (the genius codebreaker) has to redecipher Nazi radio transmissions during a radio blackout to prevent the biggest attack on a convoy of Allied ships in the Atlantic, and track down a traitor among his colleagues.

Through the course of the film, the tedious aspects of codebreaking are brought out well. In the absence of today's technological ability, much of the information-gathering & mundane work, like listening to radio transmissions, recording them, filing them were performed by women. I especially liked one scene, where Scott visits a place manned by headphone-wearing women, whose only job is listening to radio transmissions (an endless variety of Morse beeps); one woman pulls off her headphones and asks Scott if they truly are making sense of all these beeps. She says something like, "Our war is only this, beep beep beep." All she wants is a reassurance that their endless hours, days & months of listening to beeps is helping.

The film later moves to a juncture where the codebreaking team realises that the Nazis will only start transmitting once the Allied convoy is within range of their missiles, meaning they cannot prevent the attack, only control its extent. The tensions between the codebreakers and the naval officer in charge come to the fore, despite being on the same side. The codebreakers know that lives will have to be sacrificed for them to gain the necessary number of transmissions to crack the code; the naval officer, himself a survivor of a similar battle, thinks only to minimise the deaths.

Among the film's subplots is a storyline incorporating the horrifying Katyn Massacre - Stalin's brutal killing of thousands of Polish citizens during Russia's invasion of Poland in 1939-40 (a fact that Russia denied till 1990). Scott's character is stunned on learning about this massacre, and even more horrified on realising that his government knows about it, but has chosen not to do anything because they needed Russia's might to stave off the Nazis.

Technically, Engima is an average film. The story has many subplots and demands complete concentration to understand, so I wouldn't recommend it for a leisurely watch. Its not a movie you can enjoy, but I appreciate the effort behind it because it makes you realise the many levels on which wars are fought and that the men and women on the frontline are not the only soldiers, the only heroes. But perhaps the strongest realisation for me was the sheer impossibility of the moral dilemmas thrust on decision-makers. How much will you sacrifice to protect "the greater good"?

Another turn....

2007-07-16T20:29:00.000+05:30

....in the path of my life. I've started work - my first job in the UAE, and the second overall - in an area that, as recently as a year ago, I never thought I'd work in. Then my dissertation happened and changed my professional focus. I'm a long way off from realising any of what I 'disserted' about, but I've taken that crucial first step. Admittedly, its not as big a step as I'd hoped, but its still something. I'm on the inside now......

Sensory Overload

2007-07-01T18:09:00.000+05:30

At the beginning of the year, I'd made a small wish. I had no idea it would be answered so soon and so spectacularly well. June 2007 passed by in a whirlwind of new sights, and I'm still recovering from the onslaught. I knew the package tour way of seeing a new place would be hectic, and of course, everyone knows that Europe is gorgeous, but still nothing prepared me for the.......sheer magnificence of the place.

Where do I begin to describe it all? The rolling green meadows, flowers and trees the likes of which I never knew existed (trees with purple and pink leaves - not the ornamental plants you see around, but trees .....how stunning they were!), majestic snow-capped mountains, wisps of mist floating among those mountains, rivers & lakes in all shades of blue including this unbelievable glistening turquoise (apparently due to calcites, I was told).....and God, even the clouds......I have never seen such generous puffs of fluffy white cloud before. No wonder this continent produced the best-known artists in the world.

The architecture, sculptures, mosaics and paintings are yet another unending delight for the senses. You see it all in pictures, in movies, in magazines, so it isn't as if its a brand new experience......yet none of these things can prepare you for the actual sights themselves. The awesome size of the buildings is the first thing that astounds, then as you get closer, the intricacies of the carvings and embellishments spread over these enormous structures just leaves you gasping.

I went crazy clicking photographs, trying to capture some part of this wealth of beauty for memory, but it ceased temporarily when I was inside St. Peter's in the Vatican. This place is an absolute explosion of art.....I'd start to click one sculpture, move ahead and see another one that was even more spectacular. Then I happened to look up towards the ceiling, and was lost completely. I don't have the words to do it justice so I'm not even trying. I just gave up clicking snaps and walked around, alternating my stares between walls and ceilings. If its the last thing I do, I'm going back to this place.

Here, and to the Louvre. We had just one brief hour of free time in Paris on the last day of the tour. My family was more interested in window-shopping; me, I just wanted a look at one of the most mysterious women of all time. I had a simple game plan: buy admission tickets, dart in, see the Mona Lisa, dart back out. The moment I saw the first painting in the Italian section, however, I was lost again......dazed, actually. Wide-eyed, slack-jawed I was slooowwly moving from painting to painting, when my dear mum had enough. I had to be dragged through, coz I just couldn't hurry up on my own. I sort of came to when we reached the Mona Lisa. Its only when you see other great paintings and then look at this one, do you appreciate da Vinci's sheer brilliance. There were so many other paintings I'd noticed that dwarf this one, have more vivid colours and subjects in more animated positions, but somehow lack the delicacy and the finesse with which the Mona Lisa has been rendered. I made a promise here too......that I'd come back someday, and do full justice to the Louvre.

For now, its back to editing the 2000-odd photos I took......some of the better ones will make their way here.

So many places, so little time

2007-06-08T14:26:00.000+05:30

This is going to be the theme of this trip, especially starting today when we join the tour. I've spent four days in England so far, and I wish I had more time....time to wander around these quaint little towns and bustling cities, time to really absorb the sights (of which there is no shortage). But since that's not to be, I'm doing the best to stay alert despite a hectic schedule, and take in all that I can. There's soooooo much to write about....the places, the people.....but more on all of it later.

Tourope....

2007-06-03T23:40:00.000+05:30

Well, gosh, where do I start? Soooooo much has happened since my last post.

Finished my dissertation......yay!!!!!

Better yet, I'm blogging from England!!!!!! We're celebrating various things with a vacation to Europe & today is the first day!

Landed in London & it was like a mini-Mumbai reunion......ran into some old neighbours here at Heathrow of all places.......the world is getting smaller!!!!!

Driving to my relatives placé, I got my first glimpse of the UK......I couldn't help but feel how much it looked like some of the roads back home....surprising, but true.

Now, I set off to explore the surrounding areas......its 7 pm & we still have another hour & half of sunlight to go......how cool, or rather hot, is that!

Melinda Do-lots!!!

2007-05-17T16:35:00.000+05:30

Oh I'm so deeply disappointed that Melinda Doolittle didn't make it into the final of American Idol. But at the same time, I can't say that I'm all that surprised coz somewhere down the line, the show has morphed into a personality contest. Not that the other contestants are bad, no, but hell, they're just nowhere near Melinda.

This lady is pure magic. When she performs, she doesn't just sing the song....she lives it. She understands the emotion in the lyrics and totally brings it to life. Where she took a beating I guess, is in the 'it' factor. She's not bubbly & chirpy & all that hip (which is what the voters seem to be going for), but she's still got a wonderful personality - she's calm, dignified, funny and most importantly, she's humble. That is what appealed to me most. She has a rare and precious voice that's almost divine, yet she's not arrogant about it, as so many with so little talent are.

I've no doubt that she'll go on to do very well for herself....she's already charmed cynical Cowell with both voice & personality, and won a set of discerning fans, self included. I wish her the very best, and hope she doesn't lose that all-important humility.

Ramblings & Yawns

2007-05-07T10:46:00.000+05:30

I'm sleeeepppyy, but its a lil after 9 am, so don't think I'll get to crash till the afternoon. I can't come up with any more points with which to dissect the findings of my wonderful research, and so I'm taking a break (yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwnnnnnn) and just writing coz it seems like the thing to do.

So (yyyyyyyaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwnn) summer's here......its strange how I shudder at the thought of a season I once loved. I can't get over how insanely bright it is when I wake up these days.....7 am and you need sunglasses! The humidity's back, as evident by my fogged-up glasses the moment I step into the outdoors (yaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwnnnn). I'm bracing myself coz I know the worst is yet to come. But at least I have it better than the labourers slogging it out right in front of my building to raise yet another one, so yes, me grateful for the small and large mercies.

And speaking of mercies, I am also blessed to be able to give my full attention to my studies, instead of having to fit it in with a work schedule. On that enlightening and heartening note, back I go (yaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwn).

The Secret of Santa Victoria

2007-04-29T15:52:00.000+05:30

This is an old English movie starring Anthony Quinn.....pretty obscure actually, its not on any "classic" lists, but its one of my favourites. Dad got the cassette decades ago and I first saw it as a kid. That's one of the reasons I think the movie means so much to me....it takes me back to my childhood.

Moving on, the film is set in WWII Italy -- the town of Santa Victoria to be specifc -- in the days after the fall of Fascism, when the Nazis entered Italy. Santa Victoria is a typical little Italian town whose livelihood, and indeed life, rests on wine-making. Wine is not just something they produce, its in their blood. For some, this is literally true; for example: Quinn's character Bombolini (notice the similarity with "bumble"), quite an apt name considering he's the town clown and drunkard.

After the fall of the fascist regime, the townspeople overthrow the local fascist government that had made their lives hell, and are looking for a new leadership. In the meanwhile, there is another commotion -- Bombolini has climbed a tall water tank and is attempting to paint off an existing painted sign "Long live Mussolini" (a sign that he painted on in the first place!), all while holding a bottle of his beloved wine and being dead drunk, as the townspeople look on, terrified that he'll fall.

For Hindi film buffs, if the water tank, drunk man, bottle of booze and nervous crowd ring a bell, its with good reason .....this is the scene that inspired one of Hindi cinema's most iconic moments -- Dharmendra's "chakki peesing" in Sholay. Getting back to Santa Victoria, after all the drama, Bombolini paints over the sign with the help of a friend and makes it down safely....into the welcoming arms of the crowd who now see the buffoon as a hero. In a fit of collective patriotism (and drunkeness!), he assumes mayorship of the town.....a role, that when sobriety returns, nobody thinks he can fulfil. But determined to make a success of himself, he cleans up and organizes a town council of sorts.

Things move on at a slow small-town pace, till the town's only college student returns abruptly with horrifying news: the Nazis are coming to take all the wine! What follows is a story of how a town where "everybody hates everybody else" unites to save what is rightfully its own, what is most precious to it, and a story of how a drunken buffoon transforms into a leader. There are a mix of smaller love stories interspersed, including how Bombolini regains his long-suffering wife Rosa's respect.

Funny, cynical, serious, sensuous, in parts.....but inspirational overall.....a wonderful film, with equally wonderful performances. The cassette I have is showing its age, so we've been on the lookout for the DVD, but its been hard to find. I may well have to pay a bomb when I do find it, but it'll be totally worth it.

Quote-worthy

2007-04-27T18:42:00.000+05:30

One of the most profound truths of modern life:

"Itna paisa mein itnaeech milenga!"

- Channel [V]'s Brought to you Bai

My Floral Inspiration

2007-04-20T17:03:00.000+05:30

This post was inspired by a comment left on another Bombay-lover's Bombay musings. The comment author was not a Bombay fan because s/he believed Bal Thackeray to be the city's biggest icon. S/he is of course entitled to her / his opinion, but I beg to differ. My instant reaction was yeah Mr. T is one of the city's icons, but is he the only one? Definitely not.

So who or what are the city's icons? Are they only the rich and famous, or the rich and infamous? Only the most popular places and things? Of course, all of these are iconic, but they're not the only ones. An icon could be any symbol, any person that represents a significant meaning to someone. S/he or it need not be well-known, need not be known to anyone other than you for that matter, but it could still mean a helluva lot to you....still convey something that maybe only you understand.

For me, there is one image that I remember very vividly. Its one of those things that I’d seen daily while traveling in the train but never paid attention to. Yet on that one particular day as I looked out at the same old scene zipping by, this image just stood out – a patch of flowers growing tall amid sewage. Tall stems and bright red and yellow blooms. You see them growing all over, even in gardens. I was just struck by their beauty and how glorious they looked, despite being surrounded by so much filth.

A lot of people talk about Bombay’s stark contrasts, which are of course undisputable. To me, those flowers represent that contrast – that you can have goodness, beauty and growth no matter how terrible your situation or your surroundings. More than being iconic, for me they are inspirational.

Street-smartness Tip # 1

2007-04-09T17:39:00.000+05:30

Today, I think I was almost picked up. I was standing at the corner of my street, waiting for a taxi. Cars of all other makes & sizes passed by except the taxis (Murphy's law at work). While one of the many, many cars passing by stopped, waiting to turn the corner, I happened to look at its driver. Everyday, average man, about early 40s, not of my nationality. He looked at me and smiled. Polite and cheerful soul that I am, I smiled back (it's one of my gripes about most people in this country: the subtle racism that keeps people from acknowledging each other based on the colour of their skin). So I thought, well, here's a more progressive man, good for him. He said hello, I said hello.

Then he asked me if he could give me a lift. All my alarm bells went off.....my aunt's dire descriptions of the many unreported molestation cases ran through my head. I said no thank you. He said again, "I can drop you" with a very ingratiating smile. With a firm 'no', I turned away, politeness be damned. A short while later, another car stopped almost in front of me, its windows an opaque black. The driver had stopped too far away from the corner to be waiting to see if it was safe to turn, and too close to the kerb where I was. Maybe s/he was on the phone.....or maybe not. I'd learnt my lesson. I steadfastly avoided looking at the driver's window and in 5 he drove off.

Was it something about me? Was I giving off those kind of vibes? Most people think I look scholarly, not slutty....I'm always soberly dressed....so no, couldn't have been me. Heck, I was even carrying a laptop.....definitely not a party girl's accessory. So maybe, its just how things are over here, I can't be sure. The closeted existence I've lived over the past year in this new country has kept me from learning the many small self-preservation tips that one usually picks up through experience. But anyway, I did learn one today:

If you are a lone woman waiting for a cab, especially on a small side street, don't look at the passing cars, don't acknowledge strange drivers; there's a place for politeness, but this isn't it.

1 Year On...

2007-04-05T23:33:00.000+05:30

....since leaving Bombay. I remember trying to be positive last year, even as gloom threatened to choke me. It was the biggest change of my life and I was not sure at all that it was a good thing. But today I know... it was good. In fact, it was necessary. Necessary for me to find myself, find my purpose. But despite it being a good thing, and me being happy, I'm feeling nostalgic... a little homesick. It doesn't hurt the way it used to, but it still can sure yank at those heartstrings.

So what do I miss the most?

- the sights ..... gulmohar trees, the flowers that bloomed among sewage, Diwali fireworks, the Mid-day logo, Imax, my old colleges, my church, VT station, the hideous dome over the VT subway, Marine Drive, Bandstand, Mount Mary, Siddhivinayak, all the roads in and around what we call "town", all the roads around my home....and my beautiful home.

- the sounds .... BEST bus horns, the million gaalis that form part of any commuting experience, Nashik dhol during Ganesh Chaturthi, dandiya beats during Navratri, church bells.

- the flavours .... crisp ghee sada dosa (nobody in the UAE does it like its done in Bombay), sinful Cheese dosa (nobody here seems to have heard of it!), bhel, wada pav, samosas, my old college canteen ka veg schezwan noodles (the best I've ever had), murg shifta at Ivy in between Chembur & Ghatkopar (I almost cried the first time I had this kabab....it was that divine), all the mithais (they use some freaky milk powder for sweets here & it makes me want to puke), the kababwallah's kababs near my house (er....the kababs that he makes, rather!!!), frankies (veg, chicken...doesn't matter....its all good), chole bhature, puri bhaji....God, this list can go on!!!

- the fragrances ..... some pleasant, some sure as hell anything but pleasant..... but they're all part of Bombay.

- and lastly, but most importantly, the people. Whoever said 'the people make the place' got it spot on. I'm luckier than most to be with my family here, but even as a family....we get lonely. For me, it isn't just that I miss my friends (and I do, from the bottom of my heart I do), I miss the million acquaintances....the people you've seen almost every other day, the faces you've grown up with. In the course of a typical day, you may just wave when you see them, may not even chat for 5 minutes.....but the point is that they're there. Its amazing how you take those familiar faces for granted...how you don't realize how big a part of your world they are.... till you're taken out of that world. It only hit me when I came here..... in this city, where life is so transient, where people keep coming and going, where they are much more wrapped up in their own lives, the worth of that wave hit me. Sure, its a seemingly insignificant gesture, but its the subconscious feeling behind it that matters and that so many of us don't recognize. The spirit, that when push comes to shove -- be it during the bomb blasts, the 26th July floods or any other major or minor crisis -- that unites Mumbaikars....that underlying sense of apnaapan. That's what I miss the most.

Revelation!

2007-03-29T00:02:00.000+05:30

Courtesy of Mr. Edward T. Hall, cultural anthropologist extraordinaire (whose work I've quoted here before), I've had yet another amazing insight... not only into the fields and the people that study the human mind & human relationships, but an insight into my own mind.
______________________

In his simple, clear-cut flow of writing, he says that we grow up, learn and continue to use things like TVs and cars throughout our lives, yet most of us have no clue about electronics or mechanics.....we can't describe how a TV or a car actually works. Similarly, we grow up and live our whole lives in a particular culture(s), yet most of us have no clue about how that culture works....how it affects us and how we affect it. And in many ways, culture is far more complex than electronics or mechanics.
______________________

I've never looked at my cultural sensitivities and abilities like that.

Extension Transference

2007-03-23T16:50:00.002+05:30

Another one of the interesting ideas from what is turning out to be the best book I've read in the past few months - Beyond Culture by Edward T. Hall.

_______________________

Hall refers to things like language, tools, instruments etc. as 'extensions' -- things that humans used to overcome their physical limitations, and thereby evolve more radically than any other species. These extensions have many fascinating characteristics......over the millennia, most have grown to become separate entities in themselves, with their own bodies of knowledge and skills to be learnt.

But because extensions can take on a life of their own, they are also confused with the process that was originally extended. He calls this confusion 'Extension Transference'. And one of the most complex system of extensions which is often subjected to transference, is culture. Culture is experienced as man and vice versa. Further, man is frequently seen as a pale reflection of his culture or as a shoddy version that never quite measures up, and man’s basic humanness is frequently overlooked or repressed in the process

_______________________

Quote-worthy

2007-03-18T15:42:00.000+05:30

The turning point in India's defeat against Bangladesh, accurately summed up by Ajay Jadeja on NDTV:

"I think the turning point for India was before they came on to the field. Bangladesh came on wanting to beat India. India came out thinking Bangladesh will lose it."

World Cup Washout

2007-03-18T09:42:00.000+05:30

I'm no cricket expert, so this post has nothing to do with a technical analysis of why we were Bangla-dashed last night (though even a novice like me could make out our batting was at fault). No, what I really want to vent about is the miserably pathetic spirit displayed by the team.

Sehwag is out of discussion.....I think the tumble he took at the start addled his mind. Dada endured, but he was struggling to find his feet. Uthappa and Sachin failed to deliver. The Wall was easily scaled. Yuvraj contributed, but was nowhere near his firecracking form. The new face of Indian advertising and hype, dear Dhoni, ducked out. This started off the 'hattrick' on the Indian line up.....three successive batsmen out for 0, leaving the tail-enders to salvage the wreck.

Not once, did any of them look like they had stepped out to win, or even attempt to win. Seeing the starting line-up on the field, I was reminded of a typical Indian bride on her wedding night....hesitant, shy and totally apprehensive. Sadly, in this case, our apprehension was deserved, coz we got screwed....not entirely by the bold Bangladeshis, but because of our own lack of spirit.

This was evident through seemingly small things. Whenever one batsman walked back to the pavilion and one was coming out, I didn't see them stop to exchange a few words or give a thumbs-up or any other sign of encouragement. The players watching the batsmen looked like they didn't give a damn about what was going on in the field....they were lounging back in their seats....and on the rare occasions they got to cheer, they did so as if doing someone a huge favour. The cohesion, the oneness, that is so apparent in other teams, seemed totally missing here. We may have a line-up of stars and of young talent, but I don't think we have a team.

Equifinality

2007-03-15T11:42:00.000+05:30

All the stress and nightmares aside, I really am grateful for my dissertation process. Its led me to discover fascinating impressions and expressions, and has literally opened up my eyes, not only to the world outside, but the world inside me. Inside my mind, to be more specific! Now on, I'm going to post some of these ideas and thoughts that truly got me thinking.

From Tony Morden's Principles of Management:

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Equifinality

Is the idea that "similar ends can be achieved from different paths and from different starting points, for instance depending on the character of the conditions or contingencies prevailing in the external environment"
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How true this is of life.

Blown in the Wind!

2007-03-11T09:08:00.000+05:30

What was blown in the wind? Just lil ol' me.

I went to sleep last night vowing to make time for some exercise starting today. I thought I'd start with crunches to tackle my burgeoning tummy. But I woke up to a gorgeous morning a while ago. The sun had just crept up over the horizon, the tide was in and the sea was beautifully blue. So I decided to go for a walk instead.

I was warned: its very very windy out there. But I shrugged it off....a lil wind never hurt anyone. So I stepped out, jacketed and capped (I'd just recovered from a nasty cough & cold and wasn't about to risk it again).

I was all peppy and upbeat till I reached the head of the road that faces the sea. The wind is powerful everywhere, but at this particular junction, the tall buildings on either side create a perfect channel and the wind just....blows???? No.....too mild a word....well, it just blasts straight down.

So there I was, gripping my cap with both hands to keep it from being swept away, head down, struggling to put one foot ahead of the other, my sweatpants flapping wildly against my legs. After ten loooonnng seconds, I made it out of that stretch. Only by now, I was sweating under the jacket and the cap. Apparently, it was just windy, not cold.

Out of the wind tunnel, I thought that since I'd come through I might as well go on. I didn't get very far. I saw one of the sea birds, (a gull maybe...I don't know) moving back and forth a few feet in a very odd way. I won't say it was 'flying' because it didn't look like it was flying. If a bird could ever get drunk, that's probably how it would move. Or as I thought later, maybe it was just caught in a cross-current. Whatever it was, it was unnerving.

When I got on to the main road, I heard this pretty ominous, metallic squeaking. The whole road has these banners for some event, attached like flags to metal poles, which are mounted on concrete blocks. The poles were swaying in the wind, and one of the concrete blocks had also moved. Between the bird and the banners and the fact that I was now sweating profusely, I thought I was being given pretty clear indications to clear off. The answer, was indeed blowin in the wind!!!!

Corny??? Maybe, but I'm crackin myself up.....

2007-03-08T14:03:00.000+05:30

I am plodding on through the process of completing my dissertation and its very easy to buckle under the more-than-healthy amounts of stress. Its even more easy to forget that there is a lot, in fact everything, in my life to be humbly grateful for...

...that I can devote all my time and attention to completing my education without having to work simultaneously;

...that I have a family giving me all the moral support and encouragement I need;

...that I have come into contact with knowledge and ideas that amaze and fascinate me;

...that I may have found the direction, the purpose of my professional life;

...that I just have the chance to learn.

That is what this is about. For the past few months, I've been living and breathing my dissertation. There have been times, like now, when I've felt like I'm submerged in a tube full of water and am struggling to get to the surface.... and every time I start to get close and see light, someone dumps more water into the tube and I go further down.

Its very easy in this process, to let your ego get totally carried away and feel like what you're doing will usher in the next Renaissance. What I need to remind myself is, like one wise man advising millions of students like me said, I don't have the responsibility of changing the whole world on my shoulders. This is a learning process for me. I need to be humble, I need to accept that neither I, nor minds far greater than mine, have found the answer. Its impossible in a subject like mine. I need to do my best, and just leave the rest....

G'bye Christmas Tree

2007-03-02T17:35:00.000+05:30

This morning we took down our Christmas tree.....about two months later than most people (or maybe nearly everyone) did. Why? Because I wanted to have at least one birthday with the Christmas tree around. So I turned another year older a few days ago, baked a sexy chocolate cake, and had photos clicked of me hugging the tree.

I guess the basic reason why I wanted the tree to remain stems from sibling rivalry. My sis was born two days before Christmas, so she's always had the tree during her birthday. It wouldn't have been practical to leave the tree up that long in Bombay. But here..... central air-conditioning = relatively dust-free environment = no worries about the tree getting messed up = Shalom can have the Christmas tree till her birthday!

The Pursuit of Happyness

2007-02-26T15:00:00.000+05:30

Saw this amazing movie based on the true story of an even more amazing person. God, it really drives home the point of how grit and determination to 'pursue' your dreams can totally transform your life. Of course, the path is never easy. In the case of Chris Gardner, the protagonist, it is a road that seemed impassable at times. The most heart-wrenching moment is when a homeless Chris spends the night sitting in a subway men's room, with his son sleeping on his lap; someone keeps banging on the door wanting to use the facility, but his son needs the rest, so he braces a foot against the door and covers his son's ears to block out the noise, tears streaming down his face.

Even if this were fictional, it would have been tremendously moving. But to know that somebody actually underwent this struggle..... it opened my eyes for a much needed introspection....

Droplets from my Memories

2007-02-19T11:26:00.000+05:30

One of the better accidents of fate led a fellow blogger to leave a few thoughtful words for me. On visiting her blog, I was stunned to read a post that so closely mirrored a feeling that I have often had, yet could perhaps never have expressed as beautifully as this.

Reading it, I was inspired to leave a record of some droplets, pearls of my memories...moments when I felt uplifted, truly blessed to be alive and well, and at one with the universe...

- Hurrying on an overbridge at Kurla station, furious at every lecher jostling past, yet looking up all of a sudden and then feeling wonderfully calmed at the sight of a glorious full moon.

- That one instant on a monsoon evening, when the clouds part and the sun shines through briefly....have you ever noticed how ethereal the world looks then? And it is only in that fleeting moment, when all the elements are present: it has to be in the evening, with the sun at that precise angle, and with the clouds a specific shade of gray...the world around you lights up in a way that it never does otherwise, and pearls of water glisten in that magical light.

- Walking through Nariman Point, my mind anxious about work, and then feeling a refreshing sea breeze waft in....again I look up, this time its sunlight filtering through the trees, the first flower blossoms falling.....the beauty of Bombay in a short-lived spring.

- On a hilltop in Khandala, gazing at the panorama below in sheer awe, amazed that such vivid natural beauty exists only a couple of hours from the bustle of Bombay.

- One night in a garden outside Hyderabad, when despite a party rocking all around me, it was just me and the music, moving with a rhythm, with a freedom, with an exhilaration I had never felt before, nor since.

- Moments of shared, uncontrolled laughter....the pearls that can set you off even years later.

- Those few instances of true friendship, when despite the flaws, the fights, the disappointments, the loneliness, you realize that someone has selflessly stood by you. Or it is the unexpected phone call, email, SMS.....a few words that let you know that friendship transcends distance.

Emirates Palace Hotel

2007-02-12T14:14:00.000+05:30

The Emirates Palace Hotel, Abu Dhabi

Not the best pic in the world (but decent enough considering I had to dash from the car with a guard shrieking on his whistle telling me to get lost). I had the opportunity to visit this architectural showpiece last night courtesy a corporate dinner. A chance to finally see the inside of this place (and the hope of mind-blowing food!) drew me there.

The hotel is, of course, the most ornately fabulous place I've ever been to. No expense has been spared in embellishing every inch of it. God bless those tireless, talented artists who combined to produce this wonder, and those who are in very likely thankless jobs, struggling to maintain its glory.

The buffet stunned us with its sheer extravagance (I've never seen a table with more dessert delicacies!), but alas, looks were deceiving in this case. It was good, but it couldn't compare to the exquisiteness of the fare at the much more humble Taj Khorfakkan.

We didn't get to see much of the hotel, but Insh'allah, someday I'll stay there on my own money.

Love at First Bite

2007-02-06T22:27:00.000+05:30

In India, and apparently in the UAE too, the name 'Taj' is quite frequently adopted by many in the food and hospitality business. But the actual offerings rarely live upto the glory of their name. Fortunately, this wasn't the case with the Taj Khorfakkan Restaurant.

The bland European-style fare served at the hotel in Khorfakkan forced us to seek tastier avenues (that and the fact that the buffet cost a bloody bomb!). We were told that there was only one Indian restaurant nearby - the Taj. So we set off on our first evening, hoping for some less expensive, more wholesome food than our lunch had been.

Though it was neat and clean, the place didn't have any 'ambience' to speak of. The first unique thing was the menu, bound inside two wooden boards carved like ornate doors. Not expecting much, we stuck to the usual options - biryani, chicken kebabs, a mutton gravy and some rotis. But man oh man.....the flavour.... the heavenly, gorgeous, mouth-watering flavour!!!! I was stunned ..... I couldn't imagine finding the best Indian food I'd ever tasted in a small coastal town in the UAE!!!

For the next three days, we took all our meals there. And they just kept getting better. We must have tried almost everything on the menu. But for me, there was nothing more beautiful, more exquisite, more perfect than the paratha. A hardcore non-vegetarian, it wasn't the succulent kebabs or the excellent fish fry that I fell for, but the paratha. If I could, I'd compose sonnets in its name, and for chef Abdul, God bless the man. After years of eating parathas that were dry, rubbery, tough or over-browned, here was a gorgeous work of art -- all glowing orange against a shimmery cream..... flaky, marvelously soft and oh so tasty! Truly love at first bite!!!